Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Morning Face. :)
That building is a recent rebuild. It was falling apart. £15 million later....
How’s Face today?
Not too bad, thanks! My son posted an old pic of me for Mother’s Day on Facebook, and I wasn’t happy — 40 pounds heavier, glasses and REALLY short hair! LOL! But he loves me and that’s as good as it gets!
How are you doing? You have sunshine and nice weather and we have rain and more rain. The weather gods are pretty mixed up!
Just about to have a cuppa tea. :)
That sounds very good! I think I’ll join you!
*slurrrp* , hahhhhh!
:)
Don’t forget the two Chocolate Digestives to go with the Coffee. :D
We are rather convincing, aren’t we, Moosie?
My tea of choice today is hibiscus tea. It tastes a lot like red bush tea, which I really like.
:o]
:D
It is a service we provide.
You have hibiscus !?
Mellow chill-out in 5-4-3-2.....
Great stuff.
Yes, I bought some after our last discussion about it. I like it! It’s even good cold!
Precious Ramotswe drinks red bush tea. I’ve never tried it.
Back from church. Everything was a success. My feet hurt!
Yes, and that’s when I bought some, when I read the first book in the series. It’s very good and rather citrusy, but the hibiscus is quite similar, just not as tart.
I’m glad you’re back from church. That must have been a long four hours for you.
Some gals from the church came by and brought me some Mother’s Day treats, which I thought was really sweet.
And my daughter is on her way here, as we speak.
I hope you and your daughter have a nice visit! My family are all home except Bill, who is at work at the grocery store. Tom just arrived back from wherever he went last night.
Shannon is napping and shedding on one of my new chairs. I was invited for a Mexican blowout with one of the First Communion families, but I really should be with my own dubious Offspring, plus my arteries are still aching from the snacks at choir practice yesterday.
So far, so good on the visit. She hooked up the home theater stuff, and we are still a cable short, but my daughter ordered the thing we need, so she will hook it up soon, so I can watch movies! YOWZAH!
Shannon is certainly of two minds about where she wants to sit! LOL! So many chairs, so little fur!
Yes, Mum’s Day is a good time to spend with dubious offspring. Which is what I’m doing. And my son called!
YAY!
Better for your arteries than a Mexican First Communion blowout.
My arteries have threatened never to be clogged. :o])
My daughter just now left, and I’m pretty beat up. I think she wanted me to go to a movie with her, but I’m just too tired.
My right leg is bothering me, too, so I will go to bed, soon.
And I believe I’m off to bed.
Ta!
Ta!
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