Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Today's kitten lives in Romania.
Aw, excessively cute.
I’m up, but I sure don’t want to be. I slept most of the night, but kept having dreams of He Who Should Not Be Named and that doesn’t bode well for Him. This is the second night in the last few days when I have dreamed of him and it scares me (If I had slept night before last, I may have dreamed of him then, but I didn’t so I didn’t.) I don’t wish him ill, but I shouldn’t be dreaming of him like this.
When the morphine has begun to work, I will strip the bed and sort the laundry. I will dress warmly. It’s 58 degrees and will only get to about 68 today, so I’m glad I didn’t swap out my winter clothes last week!
Now to comb my hair...which I hope to cut, shortly, into a shorter style. (Is “shortly” the Buzz Word of the Day?” And will I get a prize for using it?)
I love seen animals of different species being friends. Just like little kids, they don’t know from different.
Are you feeling better today?
Good morning, All.
I ran in the 9/11 memorial fun run yesterday. It seems so wrong to have had FDNY personnel standing along the route cheering us. We were running to cheer them.
That looks to be altered. I’ll bet the deer is licking a salt lick.
It’s 58 degrees, the wind is W @ 12-15 mph, and the humidity is 38%. I just opened the door and unlocked the gate and it smells like rain, out there. Weather prognosticator says it’s raining on the I-15 to the west of us, so I’m thinking we’ll get some, soon.
I will dress up VERY warmly when I head for the laundry room... *shudder*
Um...if I may ask the obvious: Why isn’t the 9/11 Memorial Fun Run not scheduled for 9/11?
But then, I don’t live in Neew Yawk.
You’d have to ask the museum people. I suspect it’s because so many places are clogged up with events honoring those who fell that it would be tough to get a track.
I’ll tell you what, though, it was COLD out oun the pier waiting to start. And everyone was dressed to be running, not standing still. They should run in May.
LOL!
Took the wind right outta my sails, that one did.
I’m going to lease an Asus when this laptop is in the shop, but I already suspect an Asus will be my next purchase, if I can’t pull the money together for a custom job.
Ah. OK. It just seems to me it should be closer in time to the actual event, rather than five months out.
When I was in NYC for a week, it was June, but I wasn’t impressed with the weather at all. Living in the desert for most of the last 40 years, I can say, this is MY kind of weather!
Well, not the rain and wind, but warm and dry. That’s the ticket!
It’s RAINING!!!
Anon...as in, "The battle with the flu will have crested anon, tomorrow perhaps."
The image is from a late 1800s edition of National Police Gazette, the story was titled “Battle With Corpse Eating Cats” it more or less (well OK less) seemed to fit the theme of the Undead Thread...
My dreams were a weird combination of “Grease” and the life of Mary Shelley.
Gargling with Listerine works wonders on colds and flu. Really clears things out...ahem.
The laundry is done, and now the bed has to be made. I couldn’t figure out why I had a quarter left when I used two machines, and after they started, I sat down, facing them and noticed that one was on regular wash and the other was on “Heavy Soil” which fills the tub a little higher. GAH! But, that machine didn’t have as much in it as the one with bedding, so it was all good. And I need to get quarters again. That extra .50 cents to dry makes a lot of difference.
I called the appointment desk, and my doctor is out on maternity leave again. She had so much fun the first year her son was born that I figured she wouldn’t stop with one! She was always bragging about him!
So my appointment is tomorrow at the Convenient Care clinic at 1130. I don’t want to go that late, but I need to.
And: TA-DA!! I’m making sun tea with no sun! Clever me! Another hour and it should be done. :o]
We’ve already gotten .25” of rain, but since the forecast was for only a 60% chance of rain, this is only 60% rain.
Afternoon, Moosie! My mother always had a bottle of Listerine on hand, and I used to, when my kids were home and I had a spouse. Maybe I should start buying that again...
How are you doing today?
Raucous round of applause for your outstanding productivity! I went to Walmart.
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