Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Fast food?
But poor service.
The only thing we have to worry about here when we plant is the wayward utility vehicle that careens around the property, mangling the sprinkler heads that were just repaired and making us all wish it were battery-operated instead of gasoline powered.
And I don’t plant green, growing things, anyway, because I’m s serial plant killer: My black thumb proves it.
Hahahahaha!
Both are very pretty kittehs!!! *hug dem*
59 degrees SE@ 14 mph 23% with a high of 63 projected for today.
And I’m wondering why I got out of bed this morning.
Overslept. Feel like I was beaten up in the night. Bad dreams.
‘morning...
Morning, folks. It’s sunny here, expecting a high in the 60s. We went to the gym.
Boy, I know how that feels. I just got up from an hours’ nap, and I feel like I need to do it again.
And I haven’t been sleeping well, what with bad dreams and all, so I empathize. *hug*
And now, I can hardly wait until bedtime...*sheesh*
Good morning to you...want some dark chocolate? That’ll get yer heart started! *heh-heh*
Jake has Sunbeam Time in his bed now, but Shannon doesn’t get it until after 1:00. Andrew Wilkow is going to have Ted Cruz on his radio show this afternoon. Maybe I’ll remember to turn it on.
It’s sunny here, too, with the wind blowing... 62, NW @ 8, 18%. Unghh.
And I’m having chills right now. I haven’t felt good for a week, now, maybe a little longer. *bleh*
And now I can’t decide if I want coffee, tea, hot cocoa or hot cider...decisions, decisions... :o|
I suggest tea.
I’m going to read in the living room until the kids have finished lunch and cleared up.
There is a Sunbean coming in the window (When I was a tot, singing in Primary, I thought the song was, “Jesus Wants Me For A Sunbean,” so that’s what it is to me!) and the wind is making the shade all dappled and dancing. It won’t last long, though. Maybe another 15 minutes before it is more toward the south.
I could fall asleep. Maybe I want some tea, too.
I just made some coffee and a slice of rye toast. Maybe I will feel a little better after I nibble some.
I hope.
Maybe you need an early nap, too! :o]
I’d be happy to get an early nap, but I need to get Kathleen squared away. Maybe after the radio interview; that’s less than an hour from now.
This working for a living is a communist plot to remove the joy from our lives!!!!
Wait ... that’s not right.
But it sure feels like it!
Of course it's not right. The communist plot is to have you not working for a living, but subsiding on government handouts, while during the day you're required to produce your "fair share" of what everyone else needs.
It may occur to you to wonder at this point whether it might be simpler to let folks just go and do their jobs, and then buy what they need from what they earn, but that wouldn't leave any room for the government to be telling you what to do, you silly capitalist!
Did you see the quote yesterday where the guy was asking Bernie Supporters if they realized that those wealthy people whose wealth they wanted to redistribute earned that wealth via capitalism?
I wish I had seen that. But then, Bernie has been living off the public all his life. He doesn’t know any other way to be than non-productive.
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