Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Our forecast shows temperatures in the 70s and thunderstorms over the next few days. I’m confused.
That’s an amazing weather front, coming to gift you with rain and/or snow that I’m sure you could deal with if it weren’t so cold.
And in NV news...some idiot woman deliberately drove her car into a crowd of people on the Strip, in front of the Paris Casino. One person dead, 40 injured.
That’s what I woke up to. *sheesh*
My morning will be officially shot by the time I get my pills at Walmart. I will also ask for the printout so I can get my meds transferred so I don’t have to wait until 0900 for the pharmacy to open. Talk about a time-waster!
One of my great nieces got married on Saturday, and I knew from the first pic they posted on FB that love was in the air. I got an invitation, but there is no way I could have gotten to Idaho for it!
Oh, that’s a good one, Moosie! Grumpy Cat is always good in a meme.
We won’t hit the 60’s all week. I’m done with winter, and it hasn’t even officially started, yet.
I hope I don’t have to stand in the cold too long this morning. When I first moved here, we all had keys to the laundry room, and I could go anytime I wanted, which was usually around 0430. No one to bother me, and I could use all four of the machines if I needed to.
Thanks for asking, although I’m answering 2 days later. (DOH)
She seems fine. She still tires easily but when she’s up she’s much more like her normal 10-y-o puppy self.
I’m glad to hear that, ArGee. I thought about her over the weekend, for what it’s worth.
It’s hard to believe that Christmas is Friday...maybe because I haven’t decorated...
We finally bought our tree yesterday. Well, it’s a little bush really since we have such a small apartment.
Anyway, we usually wait and then keep it up since Christmas is *supposed* to start on 12/25 and end on 1/6.
No tree here. No ornaments. No decorations. Everything is in the boxes, and I didn’t feel like getting them all out.
Maybe next year.
Well, I lied...I have the Nativity that I never put away and a Serta Sheep (pink) is in front of it for atmosphere, and a shelf elf but that’s it.
Who needs a tree when you can have BACON!!! Yum-yum-yum!
When I was searching for the image Gobble suggested I type “recipe.” So maybe that’s out there.
Nah...not enough people to eat it, and I wouldn’t want to waste all that bacon!
But thanks!
Outlook : Intermittent wet for the next week. Temperature cooling slowly to the next weekend.
That better? :)
Was looking for a Grumpy cat for a work E-mail..... :)
*tagline*
Just sat on top of his scratching post, lice and bedbugs no doubt, with people bringing him food, while angels sang in his ears alone. Made him a saint.
Grumpy Cat always works!
That cat may be grumpy by a twist of fate, but she sure makes a lot of people smile!
My sister likes to argue that everyone *should* vote and we should do whatever we can to make sure everyone does.
Of course, my opinion is only those educated enough in what’s going on because Trump, Hillary.
Wow. What an awesome relic!
Is it for real? Or a tourist thingy?
Makes sense to me.
I have to re-set my computer today. It’s been getting wonkier by the day. I should have gotten the Asus instead of the Dell.
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