Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
I wish I had some Diet Coke. Oh, well.
Odd...I’ve never cared for cola, once RC Cola had to give way to Pepsi and Coke. Squirt and Dad’s Root Beer were my favorite.
I’m sleepy but I don’t want more coffee. I need to pick Tom and Pat up at church at 10:15. They rode over with Bill, but he’s going to work afterward.
Tea? That’ll pep you up!
I just had some Earl Grey and a mini sourdough English muffin. NOMNOMNOM!
You should get your crumpets in a couple of weeks.
I will watch for the crumpets! So fun to eat!!
I was thinking seriously about going to church today, but my hips are burning, for some reason. And I didn’t sleep well last night. I woke up a little after midnight and it was close to 0300 when I finally went back to sleep.
In the local news this morning, a city bus plowed into a bus stop and killed a person. When they finally got the body untangled, they couldn’t even tell the gender.
The report said the driver “lost control,” and ran up on the curb. Most of the drivers are drug free, because they are all subject to random drug tests, and those are always monitored.
I, for one, am glad that Busdaddy has never had to deal with something like that.
George Foreman was born on this day in 1949, and Rod Stewart on this day in 1945.
:o]
I need to get ready for church in a few minutes. I keep remembering things I have to do first ...
And here I thought I was the only one to get side-tracked while trying to accomplish things...
;o]
Not at all. I printed out a couple of things ... now I just have to remember to take them, and then I have to remember why I took them ...
I think I’ll finish dressing before I accidentally walk out in my Confederate Artillery t-shirt instead of the Official White Blouse of Choir.
Or like me...walking out without your ID and DL...
I just fixed another ulcer cocktail, and noticed I’m almost out of ginger. I don’t use it for anything but that, but it sure does a good job.
Now I’m sleepy again. Ohnoes. Maybe I need to go run around the block, or something...
Cute kittehs!
Squee!
That one with the cage over it is pretty doggone scary, just to contemplate.
The other is a little on the funny side!
Something tells me that I’m going to get awfully tired of political ads between now and November! *sheesh*
I’m already muting the TV a lot.
Fortunately for me, I don’t watch TV.
I just keep it on for the noise. Otherwise, it would be very quiet in here.
I get my news on the Internet, and I don’t have any premium channels, so about the only thing I watch is the local weather and PBS — only because I can’t get documentary channels.
Poor fellow, only 43.
!
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