Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Mine?
Ohnoes!
Poor Fluffy!
We have liquid sunshine today. :o|
In other words, the faulty Dell made it to Dell HQ in Houston.
Close! If you hadn’t posted, I would have let Nully have it.
The post, that is. ;o]
Jake and Shannon have Sunbeam. We plan to go to the library, if the appropriate parties can get themselves sorted out.
I just went to the Rebel station to get quarters for Monday. It is so NICE to see that the wipers are doing their jobs! LOL!
It still smells nice out, but after a while, the odors of life will take over and I’ll have to wait until early tomorrow morning for it to smell like rain on the desert again.
Nothing is planned. The right ankle and the back are knocking me out today. UNGH!!!
Howdy!! That kitteh reminds me of a story. Decades ago when I lived in cali my stepfather was watching baseball on TV in the living room. He was laying on the floor.
Behind him was our sliding glass doors going out to the pool. Our cats....kittens at the time walked up to him then had that pose this kitteh has. They had their hair up on their backs. Walking sideways up to my stepfather.
He was freaking. LOL they saw their reflection in the window behind him.
That makes my eyes go jig-jog!
LOL!
Yup! LOL!
Ah, Another Wisconsin Tall Cat !
NY for Long Cats, WI for Tall Cats.
And Las Vegas for Cool Cats! ;o]
My cat did that this morning.
LOL! Cats are cool when they do that as adults, but when they do it at kittens, I often, literally, roll on the floor laughing!! <3
She was spazzing out completely.
Her head was wiggling all over as if she were shaking her head “no” while looking everywhere.
And the sideways shuffling while arched.
*snerk*
Yah, that’s really funny stuff! Natural born comedians!
A few years back, the neighborhood slut calico kept slipping out of my rear yard towards a neighbor’s tool shed. One day I happened to be working just about there when I heard a quiet mewling. Peered under the raised shed floor and spotted five tiny kittens. Each about the size of a large Kiwi fruit but three times as hairy. Two of the little beasties started with the raised hackles and hissing and trying the side ways hopping. They collided with one another, forgot about be and commenced to boxing. Laughed so hard at these tiny thugs duking it out and spitting and hissing between bouts of toppling over. Moments when one wishes a video cam was available.
LOL!
There is a pattern developing,here.
Looks like evolutionary development to environmental stress.....CoolCats: A Cat fitted with AirCon, designed for the hot Dessert environment.
I wonder what will come wondering out of Texas.? Whatever it is ,you don’t want to mess with it.
The Rattle Tailed Cat perchance?
Was She having her software updated by force?
Is she okay now?
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