Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
(nab)
Yes, I have had several computers where tiny e-vil laughter came from the hard drive, every time I got frustrated. It’s a conspiracy!!! ;o]
I think now they are using a different language, and the e-vil laughter sounds like a pingy thingy from a sci-fi movie...
Snap! Too slow.
Not that hungry yet ...
That is THE. WORST. question to ask me when I’m already frustrated by an inanimate object. I have hung up and called back, just so I wouldn’t have to deal with that level of “I know more about computers than you ever will so shut up and listen.”
THAT post actually works. Often.
Yes, sweet potatoes ARE better! I like sweet potato fries, too, and the chips. I know from a dietary stance, they are better for you.
But what I was thinking in the way of soup was a can of broth, some frozen vegetables and a can of chicken, beef or tuna would make a meal. The small can of broth would be good, and not make too much. And maybe throw in some fat noodles! Or rice. Why I never though about this before, I will never know.
:o|
That was — interesting. I think.
Her name was : Padme Amidala.
I suspect she did have her ups and downs , and reputedly has a great singing voice.
That cleared the rope....
The referee has raised his finger...it’s a SIX ! :)
Happy New Year, Moosie! Are you in the final countdown hours?
Star Wars VII.
As an action film: 8
As a Starwars Film: 7
As a film with a story: 4
A rehash of episodes 4-6.
Needs to be seen in the cinema, or you’re going to need a bigger TV.
The cert12 is a bit harsh.
The Bacon sandwiches in the foyer were very good.
And a Happy NewYear to you to ‘Face.
6 hours to go....
There may be a bit of a squeal as we pass midnight the oiler ran out of lube until Feb.
to you too....duh!
Happy New Year hug! (I forgot to add that! LOL!)
:o])
:)
(((Hugs)))
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