Posted on 09/04/2015 5:55:01 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Thanks for everything, Summer. Don't come back for another 12 months, m'kay?
Dear Sun. Some of us would like to sleep in until 7. K-thx.
Bring on jeans, leggings, and never, ever having to bandage bloody nicks.
Sometimes I just want to sit in my dark, den of a house and watch TV and nice weather BE DAMNED.
And only some of that is actual dirt.
A dry nose and eyes that don't water? Must be magic.
If I wanted to sunburn while I ate, I could've just had a sandwich on the sidewalk.
Just put on a sweatshirt and EAT ALL OF THE ICE CREAM.
FACT: If you got to leave the country, I secretly hate you.
Bring on open window weather!
Not much you can do about it in 99% humidity.
Life is so much simpler when you can wear long sleeves. (But seriously, always wear sunscreen. Always.)
Mmm... the refreshing feel of bacteria.
#1: I have a house.
First frost and they're all dead. Can't wait... mwahahahaha!
***
One sunny day in January 2017, an old man approaches the White House from across Pennsylvania Avenue where hed been sitting on a park bench. He speaks to the U.S. Marine standing guard and says, I would like to go in and meet with President Obama.
The Marine looks at the man and says, Sir, Mr. Obama is no longer President and no longer resides here. The old man says, Okay, and walks away.
The following day the same man approaches the White House and says to the same Marine, I would like to go in and meet with President Obama.
The Marine again tells the man, Sir, as I said yesterday, Mr. Obama is no longer President and no longer resides here. The man thanks him and again just walks away.
The third day the same man approaches the White House and speaks to the very same U.S. Marine, saying, I would like to go in and meet with President Obama.
The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looks at the man and says, Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking to speak to Mr. Obama. Ive told you already that Mr. Obama is no longer the President and no longer resides here. Dont you understand?
The old man looks at the Marine and says, Oh, I understand. I just love hearing it.
The Marine snaps to attention, salutes, and says, See you tomorrow, Sir!
***
***
"In a new campaign ad, Jeb Bush referenced 'The Godfather' and said his nickname used to be 'Veto Corleone' because he vetoed so many bills in Florida.
When you're the third person in your family to run for president, maybe you shouldn't bring up a movie trilogy where the third one was clearly the worst." Jimmy Fallon
***
"Today Jeb Bush announced he's running for president on Snapchat. By using Snapchat, Bush's message will disappear after 10 seconds just like the excitement over his campaign." Conan O'Brien
***
"Jeb Bush is taking his presidential campaign on a tour of Europe. He's telling Europeans, 'I like you guys because you're comfortable having the same family in charge for centuries.'" Conan O'Brien
***
He makes . me so sleepy . ZZzzzz
"Jeb Bush gave a speech yesterday. He had a pretty rough time. He accidentally said that ISIS has 200,000 men instead of 20,000, and then he mispronounced the name of the terrorist group Boko Haram. So if history has taught us anything, Jeb is well on his way to winning the White House." Jimmy Fallon
***
"By accident Jeb Bush announced that he was running for president.
And then he said, 'No, not yet. OK, I made a mistake.' And then later in the day, by accident, he called Hillary and congratulated her. " David Letterman
***
"According to The New York Times, Jeb Bush identified himself as Hispanic on his 2009 voter registration form. While Hillary Clinton identified herself as 'President.'" Seth Meyers
***
"Jeb announced on the Internet that he is exploring a 2016 bid for president. And to increase his chances, he's going to run as just 'Jeb.' He said, 'My last name? It's not important.'" Seth Meyers
***
"Jeb Bushs brother Neil said that their mother has 'come around' to the idea of Jeb running for president in 2016. Because if there's anything that says you're qualified to be president, it's your own mom saying, 'I guess you could do it.'" Jimmy Fallon
***
"Bush said his brother, Jeb, would make a great president. That's all we need. Big Brother's little brother." Bill Maher
***
IN!!!
IBP
Woohoo!! I’m taking a week off next week!
Good Morning!
:-)
Top Six! :-)
Top ten
WOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AH MEN TGIF!!
Number 10... woohoo.
Bet I am now 11.
Top ten!
What a relief! Now many of us can get back to washing our feet every other night. Or, like me, every 3 or 4 days. :)
Dang! Missed it by that much! Oh well. Happy Friday everyone. :)
IN!!!
Happy FReeper FRiday!
That was a great show! Thanks for posting.
FLOATING SPOON on Mars
What a relief! Now many of us can get back to washing our feet every other night. Or, like me, every 3 or 4 days. :)You still picking your feet in Poughkeepsie?
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