Where to retire?

Email | 21 July 2013 | Unknown

[Windflier]

Some uniquely American humor for a Sunday evening. Enjoy!

[arthurus]

Houston has long had a bunch of Cajuns living there who don’t use the term properly, it not being actually Cajun, and their use has infected the Houston area.

[MarkeyD]

The 5 longest years of my life were the 9 months I spent living in Massachusetts.

[bigheadfred]

EXACTLY

[advertising guy]

so true or in Texas,
a couple three means 2

and we Texans go down to Montana

[thecodont]

This is great!

Do we have one for Hawai’i? Or Nevada?

[arthurus]

Lots of New Yorkers retire to New York. They move to the Miami Borough around Biscayne Bay just a little demographically south of Long G'island.

[Berosus]

As a former Floridian, I recommend adding these to the Florida list:

6. You’ve gotten used to having bugs in the kitchen, and lizards and snakes in the yard.
7. The seasons are: Early Summer, High Summer, Late Summer, and Not Summer.

[Carriage Hill]

Ha! It’s delicious fried, and eaten with butter and maple syrup - I love it - but DON”T ASK WHAT’S IN IT!

[Lakeshark]

You can retire to the Midwest where...

6. You end most sentences with "eh"?.....Instead of saying "what", you say "eh", the word magically means lots of things.

7. You actually believe you don't have an accent when you speak.......

8. The favorite church hymn is #372, "In Heaven There is No Beer".

9. Badgers and Wolverines fight with each other for sport.

10. Lutherans are the strongest gang and have the best colors........

[Windflier]

My maternal grandfather was a Louisiana country boy, but he was very insistent that his daughters grew up speaking the Queen’s English.

Mom tells me that when they were little, he’d tell them “Don’t say y’all, say you all.”

;-)

[Old Sarge]

You soon discover that the characters from "King Of The Hill" aren't fictional.

Boomhauer. That's all that needs to be said.

Boomhauer...

[Standing Wolf]

You can retire to Minnesota where...

3. You have more than one recipe for casserole.

Having spent eleven winters in Minnesnowta, I can tell you with full authority you'll never hear the word "casserole" unless you're speaking with a recent import from Iowa, the Dakotas, or 'Sconsin. The term is "hot dish." According to a friend who still lives there, the most recent count is 45,782,142 varieties of hot dish. The best place to eat in any town is a potluck supper.

[Carriage Hill]

I’m thinking a 2lb brick of Scrapple probably looks like C4, on an airport scanner.

[Windflier]

Do we have one for Hawai’i? Or Nevada?

Can't retire to Hawaii - it's full up with liberals and other 'people'.

Nevada? Only if you love scorching temps, scorpions, or hookers and thieves.

[Windflier]

Boomhauer. That's all that needs to be said.

I've lived next door to Boomhauer at least a couple times since moving here ;-)

Never understood a single word he said, either.

[Billthedrill]

Well, we're not all armed-to-the-teeth racists. I knew a guy in southern Idaho who truly loved all his fellow men and women no matter what their race, creed, or origin. He was open, loving, progressive, sophisticated, and educated.

That's why I shot the bastard. Officer.

[Eepsy]

Number four for Minnesota is completely wrong. Everyone knows the best flannel lingerie has buttons that go all the way down....

[bigheadfred]

LOL

[Windflier]

Everyone knows the best flannel lingerie has buttons that go all the way down....

Dang. Must have to be from a cold weather state to get that one. Most of us Texans figure the best lingerie is a set of tan lines ;-)

[ConservativeInPA]

Would Idaho accept a well armed racist from PA? I do have a sense of humor though.