Posted on 11/11/2012 12:18:55 PM PST by Badabing Badablonde
I confess. I'm horrid at tipping. I dread that moment when that impersonal folder is placed discreetly at my elbow, and I begin the task of checking the bill and scrutinizing the service. I came in for a meal and I still resent the fact that I can't pay for just my meal.
When I was a kid, tipping was different. I remember watching my dad pay the bill, then as we stood to go he would tuck a few bills under a saucer or a salt shaker. When I asked, he explained that our waitress did a good job, paid extra attention to us, made our meal pleasant, and he wanted her to know he appreciated it. That made an impression on me, because it told me that a job well done had its rewards.
Fast forward to today. We are expected to have our meal selections made in a matter of seconds. Hot plates arrive half way thru the salad, and the bill arrives with a convenient line for a diner to indicate the tip amount. Get us in, get the money, get the next party sat.
Because, you see, a tip today is an entitlement. We are expected to pay extra for the basic service. We are not asked if we appreciate the attention. That is assumed. We are grateful to just get service, and maybe if the service was really bad its acceptable to ditch the tip. Waiters assume we will make up for the deficit in their wages. Because, you know, it's just not fair that they don't make the salary that Joe the Stockbroker makes.
I have my share of tipping horror stories. Like the waiter who waited for me outside the ladies room and demanded to know why his tip was below 20%, forgetting that he got half our orders wrong, wrote nothing down, charged us regular price for happy hour drinks, and we had to hunt him down when we needed him. There was the waitress who believed that because I paid in cash she could help herself to my change.
Spare me the argument that its a poor paying tough job, and just agree with me that some endeavors are just a gamble. Do we sit down at the poker table and blame the other players for hand we are dealt? Do we make the dealer take their cards to give us a better hand? Or do we try to make the best of the hand we are dealt? Do we try to make it up with the next hand?
At least in life, we are not forced to fold. We can play as many hands as we can stand, stay in the game as long as we want.
Anyway, I had my lunch today, the waitress performed her job according to her job description, I made no unreasonable demands, and I quietly added 15% to my bill. But deep down I resent her entitlement attitude that I have to pay for her minimum wage choice.
Preparing for Freeper backlash.........
Waitresses don’t even make minimum wage and you are of course free to couch cheap behavior in any spin-dress you choose.
I tip very well when the experience is good....and very poorly when the experience is bad. But in my area, most experiences are good.
Maybe you should eat at home more.
What incentive for good or even great service would there be if there was no tipping?
Then I guess a career change would be in order
Wait staff is usually underpaid and overworked. IMO.
I don’t consider a tip an entitlement...but earned pay. If I get poor service, they’ve earned less of a tip. If I get good service, they’ve earned a larger tip.
If the food is bad...I do not blame the server. BUT how they handle my commenting on bad food...also will be reflected on the salary they’ve earned from me.
As do I. But today, actually applying consumer criteria to the service received is appalling. In other words, I’m a terrible tipper if I don’t mindlessly tip 20%.
Perhaps you should get out more.
I have my share of tipping horror stories. Like the waiter who waited for me outside the ladies room and demanded to know why his tip was below 20%, forgetting that he got half our orders wrong, wrote nothing down, charged us regular price for happy hour drinks, and we had to hunt him down when we needed him. There was the waitress who believed that because I paid in cash she could help herself to my change.
That waiter should have already known he wouldn’t get a tip and why. Don’t be afraid to speak up if there’s a problem.
As for the waitress, I’m sure most assume the change is their tip. All of my waitresses have brought me my change and expressed “delighted surprise” when I told them to keep it.
If the service is acceptable, they get a minimal tip. If it’s good service, they get more. If I can’t afford to tip, I stay at home and prepare/serve my own meal.
Yeah, it’s real hard to understand tipping. That’s why I recommend people like you stick to the drive-thru.
I have no idea when the current “system” started, I too grew up thinking tip/tip amounts were based on service received and my mother’s family had a restaurant. My mother and aunt were the family tip experts, from their restaurant experience and both were adamant that tips were earned. If your server went out of their way, or you had messy children or other issues they had to deal with you over-tipped. If someone was a complete fail as a server you could/should stiff them, the idea then was slackers would not be able to make a living as a server and could be replace by someone who was willing to hustle.
At some point restaurant owners decided tips were part of wages (some blame the IRS) and started a system where tips are considered part of wages, in many places shared and not given to the “earning” employee individually. It doesn’t make sense to me- if I get crummy service I would like to know I can give that message in no tip/lower tip. If I do that then other workers that do work hard and go the extra mile will also be punished for the slacker.
At this point tips have no meaning- so should be done away with. Restaurants should raise wages accordingly and it would be a more honest system.
Simply put, you tip if the experience is good. If the waiter screws up an order, the food is horrible, the service terrible, do not tip. I worked as a bartender and a waiter in college, amongst other jobs to pay for my tuition, and one thing I learned really well is one does not return a meal and want it ‘cooked more’ or ‘it’s cold’. Cooks are vindictive..
Well the little hispanic waitresses Wed AM in a FL. hotel were so giddy over their Obama win that I rewarded them with a scribbled educational note and left their tip amount as ‘ZERO’.
I almost never go to restaurants where the tip is automatically added to the bill. I’ve had 15% tacked immediately to our bill when the waiter was an a-hole.
Almost never, unless the other party or everyone chips in but I have cheapskate friends and they even balk at it.
If the service is terrible I don't tip.
If the service is adequate I leave between a 5% to 10% tip.
If the service is great they get a 20% tip.
If they challenge me on it, they get no tip.
It's my money, for now, and I'll redistribute it how I see fit.
A lot of jobs today could be defined as overwork and underpay. And as an earlier poster pointed out, where is the incentive? This is a perfect example (and a few of the comments thus far) of the current attitude of “my life sucks and someone else has to make up for it”. Lets just go the route of full communism and everyone gets standard pay and a waitress can be a waitress for life because she makes the same wages as a physician.
No, I don’t buy it. Jobs that pay minimum wage are that way for a reason. I’m the words of Jimmy Johnson, if dont like ass whoopings, play harder.
Sometimes the people waiting on you have just undergone a *career change*. For right now, waiting tables may be the best they can get, and without knowing you personally, I'd bet that you would have contempt for somebody drawing unemployment who was offered a job and refused to take it because they thought it was "beneath them."
In this economy, I have to look at someone waiting tables as somebody who is at least trying. I don't eat out anywhere near as often as I used to, but when I do, I engage the server in some idle chit chat when they first introduce themselves. 90% of the time, you'll know at that point pretty much what kind of service you're going to receive and what kind of tip you're going to want to leave.
I tip well and in cash. I know that the tips on credit card receipts will be reported, whereas cash is not and the servers are assessed at a lower than 15% rate.
If people want tipping to go away, then restaurants will have to pay servers more and, guess what? Prices will go up. Regardless of service. So, I prefer to show my appreciation for good service with a good tip (usually 20-25%, unless incredible, then sometimes 30%, if awful, then 10-15%). This is just me; although, I have been known to go back and leave extra when the person I am with undertips. lol
I do not go out to eat all that often, so my experience may not be the norm, but most servers around here are working their tails off to make money to make ends meet. I prefer to reward that, in order to make sure it continues. I consider my tip as part of the cost of the meal from the beginning, so no sticker shock for me.
Thank you! You just made my point. :-)
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