Posted on 06/15/2010 8:52:43 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
(2010-06-15) — In his first televised address to the nation from the Oval Office, President Barack Obama will reportedly tell Americans Tuesday night that the ongoing Gulf oil spill crisis has him “paralyzed with fear, and feeling absolutely overwhelmed,” according to White House sources who have reviewed a draft of the speech.
“I’m really freaked out right now,” the president will reportedly state from behind his desk. “It’s a gusher, and there’s not a thing I can do about it. I feel like a failure. I want to scream or kick something, or eat an entire container of moose tracks ice cream at one sitting. Sometimes I just curl up in the fetal position and ask Michelle, or Robert Gibbs, to hold me.”
White House sources said the speech would not only lay out a clear plan for the continuing federal disaster response, and a comprehensive approach to U.S. energy policy, but would “connect with viewers emotionally in a way that only President Obama can do.”
“The phone keeps ringing — sometimes here in the Oval Office, but mostly on the golf course — and people expect that I’ll know what to do,” the president will say. “But I don’t know what to do. I’ve never had an executive job in my life. What do they want from me? I know I have to put on a brave face for the public, but sometimes I just can’t stop sobbing. You know what I mean?”
The president plans to tell the nation that he just needs “a little me time” away from the crushing demands of work, and he’s “thinking about renting an RV and just hitting the road, eating at truck stops, listening to country music and sleeping at KOA campgrounds.”
In related news, President Obama today announced he has “suspended indefinitely” his personal moratorium on cigarette smoking.
yet again no leadership, no class in his words, the man is a total waste and a fraud
Ahhh....Scrapple...
satire is a wonderful thing
Scrappleface ...
Oh, great! What a leader!! All fears and feelings, but no ‘take charge’ or courage or spine.
What leader would ever just grovel before those he leads? So different from Churchill — ‘follow me’ or George Bush or any of the great leaders.
Can you imagine ANY president, anywhere, any time, any leader in the world’s history — with the exception of Jimmy Carter — coughing up this furball??
Ah, Scrappleface — sounds so real.
But this time the satire is soooo close to reality, it’s scary
This has to be satire. He'd never say that. He'd blame Bush.
Nah. He’s only freaked out when his boss, Soros, is mad at him.
Right now, Soros is happy as a clam raking in Petrobras bucks due to the drilling moratorium.
http://canadafreepress.com/index.php/article/24214
LOL...hard to tell Scrappleface from reality nowadays...
It wouldn’t be funny if it weren’t plausible.
seriously this is so funny but true of our narcissist in chief. i almost fell for it. i can truly picture him using these words to take his butt out of ass kicking position and trying to convey to his little daughters how serious this is.
What does Rush say? that there is an amount of truth in satire. This scrappleface bit has an aroma of truth to it. Totally could believe he would say something like this. LOL
0bama needs a Snuggie, Hot Cocoa and ‘You’ve got Mail’ DVD - that will make him feel better - poor thing.......
That's just what he feels but he'd never admit it. It's [BP's/Bush's/Our lack of a climate bills] Fault. This is what happens when you send a community organizer who's only experience with the corporate world is standing outside the corporate HQ, in front of a rent-a-mob yelling "gimmie" ,"where's mine", and "No justice No Peace" to do a man's job.
What college did he attend. I think he needs to ask for a refund.
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