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43 weird things said in job interviews
cnn ^ | July 22, 2009 | Rachel Zupek

Posted on 07/23/2009 1:11:10 PM PDT by JoeProBono

"I'm not wanted in this state."

"How many young women work here?"

"I didn't steal it; I just borrowed it."

"You touch somebody and they call it sexual harassment!"

"I've never heard such a stupid question."

Believe it or not, the above statements weren't overhead in bars or random conversations -- they were said in job interviews.

Maybe you were nervous, you thought the employer would appreciate your honesty, or maybe you just have no boundaries. Whatever the reason, you can be certain that you shouldn't tell an interviewer that it's probably best if they don't do a background check on you. (And yes, the hiring manager remembered you said that.)....

(Excerpt) Read more at cnn.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: jobinterviews
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To: justkate; Jaxter

There will be no forgiveness. For you or Jaxter. I was going to make a pun but I’m still staggered by yours.


21 posted on 07/23/2009 1:39:04 PM PDT by TomOnTheRun
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To: Dysart; Responsibility2nd

You should hire her.

Then you should hit it.

I’d hit it.


22 posted on 07/23/2009 1:39:14 PM PDT by Lazamataz ("If they taxed condoms and toilet paper, they'd have us coming and going." - Lazamataz, 2002)
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To: Joe 6-pack
I once received a resume with a cover letter in which the applicant declared his willingess to negotiate a celery.

I once had a resume writing business. You just would not believe how many college seniors, ready to graduate, could not spell. Nor did they know how to compose a cover letter -- where to even put the date, inside address, make paragraphs, etc. I felt like I had to give them an education on things we all learned in grade school. That was 15 years ago, and things have only become worse.

23 posted on 07/23/2009 1:39:40 PM PDT by CitizenM ("An excuse is worse than an lie, because an excuse is a lie hidden." Pope John Paul, II)
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To: DarkSavant

I was in an interview once (as part of the hiring team, not the applicant) when this guy came in completely in drag: dress, make-up, high heels, the whole shebang (no pun intended). His outfit was never even mentioned during the interview. Afterwords, it took us at least 10 minutes to regain our composure for the next applicant.


24 posted on 07/23/2009 1:39:54 PM PDT by lafroste (gravity is not a force. See my profile to read my novel absolutely free (I know, beyond shameless))
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To: Jaxter
For instance he was certified to work on Epson MX-80 dot matrix printers. The really weird thing was they were all in frames with glass and everything.

OMG... I think I interviewed the same guy once. I didn't hire him either. :-)

25 posted on 07/23/2009 1:40:53 PM PDT by Ramius (Personally, I give us... one chance in three. More tea?)
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To: JoeProBono

nothired.com

26 posted on 07/23/2009 1:41:53 PM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: JoeProBono
"I've never heard such a stupid question."

I have been tempted to say this in job interviews...but in the interest of self-preservation, I refrained.

27 posted on 07/23/2009 1:41:53 PM PDT by Allegra ( Socks)
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To: real saxophonist
Employer's Name
Cutting Onions

Job Title
Cutting Onions

Description of job responsibilities
Cutting Onions

Dude, you totally missed the point.
That was the name of his Alternative Rock band.

28 posted on 07/23/2009 1:42:07 PM PDT by Lazamataz ("If they taxed condoms and toilet paper, they'd have us coming and going." - Lazamataz, 2002)
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To: DarkSavant
I work with a company that does defense contracts....The applicant [asked], "Yeah, how dows it feel to make weapons that kill people?"

The Lazamataz Response: Smile darkly, stand up slowly (and with an obvious erection) and say "Almost as good as killing people with my bare hands."

29 posted on 07/23/2009 1:44:48 PM PDT by Lazamataz ("If they taxed condoms and toilet paper, they'd have us coming and going." - Lazamataz, 2002)
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To: Lazamataz
Well, i don't know about hitting per se, but being bad and all, a spanking may be in order.
30 posted on 07/23/2009 1:44:48 PM PDT by Dysart (It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong--Voltaire)
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To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers
When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment but when a woman talks dirty to a man it’s $3.99 a minute.

"Sexual harassment is whatever the office lesbian says it is." -- I forget who said this

31 posted on 07/23/2009 1:46:05 PM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: JoeProBono

Hilarious. I sent it to a friend of mine who is an executive headhunter.


32 posted on 07/23/2009 1:47:02 PM PDT by wildbill
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To: JoeProBono

I was calling some references for an applicant one time and found myself talking to his parole officer. “Well, uh, is he on time for his appointments?” I managed to ask. “No.”


33 posted on 07/23/2009 1:47:18 PM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: Lazamataz
Had another guy one time:

Have you ever been convicted of a felony?
Yes

Please describe the nature of the felony
Escape, aggravated assault

At least he was honest. No, we didn't hire either of them.

34 posted on 07/23/2009 1:54:37 PM PDT by real saxophonist (The fact that you play tuba doesn't make you any less lethal. -USMC bandsman in Iraq)
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To: Joe 6-pack

Are you making that up to amuse us?


35 posted on 07/23/2009 1:55:42 PM PDT by definitelynotaliberal (Sarah Palin - It's what happens when you attempt to bikini wax a bear.)
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To: Joe 6-pack
LOL....I once received a resume with a cover letter in which the applicant declared his willingess to negotiate a celery.

Picky, picky! MS Word spill chucker didn't find anything wrong with that sentence.

36 posted on 07/23/2009 1:56:38 PM PDT by meadsjn
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To: definitelynotaliberal

Most certainly not!


37 posted on 07/23/2009 2:00:57 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
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To: Dysart
...badchick****@email.com

Should I hire her?

Depends on her face to face interview...

38 posted on 07/23/2009 2:05:45 PM PDT by JimRed ("Hey, hey, Teddy K., how many girls did you drown today?" TERM LIMITS, NOW AND FOREVER!)
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To: JoeProBono

“How easy is it to fake a work-related injury at this place, anyway?”


39 posted on 07/23/2009 2:08:00 PM PDT by mysterio
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To: Dysart
I swear to you by all that is holy I just received a resume from an applicant and her reply address - without revealing the exact address- is: badchick****@email.com Should I hire her?

LOL, I had a guy send in a resume and his email was FUBARman@.......

I sent him an email and explained that while sending resumes to professionals he might want a more professional email address, as this impression was not good, especially to those of us who knew what the acronym meant.

He appologized and actually resubmitted with a non-cutesy email, but by that time... No way was I going to hire him.

40 posted on 07/23/2009 2:09:41 PM PDT by RikaStrom
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