Vanity: Most Annoying Christmas Songs

The Radio | 12/17/2008 | VRWCmember

[VRWCmember]

For several weeks now a few local radio stations have been playing Christmas music non-stop, and I love hearing the songs celebrating the season -- especially the traditional carols.

How can you help but feel better when you hear Nat King Cole's smooth voice singing "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire..." (The Christmas Song) or Bing Crosby wishing you a White Christmas with every Christmas card he writes. And when Mark Lowry asks Mary if she knew that her baby boy would one day walk on water, it gives me chills. My drive home from work from late November to late December is so much more peaceful and enjoyable as I hear so many cheerful and encouraging songs celebrating the nativity.

There are, however, a few annoying songs that seem to get a lot of play this time of year that prompt me to change the station as soon as they begin. Just the first few notes, before the lyrics even kick in, make me want to hurl, or lash out at the stupidity of the idiot that put the disc in the player.

So as a diversion from the more important issues of the day, please post the titles/artists of the songs of the season that induce the urge to vomit or cause you to change the station when you hear them.

Here are my top most annoying Christmas songs ever: 1. So This Is Christmas (War is over?) by John Lennon 2. Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time by Paul McCartney 3. Last Christmas I Gave You My Heart by Wham/George Michael 4. Santa Baby by Madonna

[prismsinc]

My most disliked song is that stupid one with the “Feed the world” line in it. It’s such a demagoguery of what Christmas is truly all about.

[weegee]

I downloaded 8 different versions of that and burned it to a CD which I gave to friends for Christmas one year. I played it for several hours at a party and no one noticed that it was the same song over and over and over.

Maybe they were too mesmerized by the dancing:

[LearnsFromMistakes]

ah yes. a classic...

[Bubba Ho-Tep]

Special mention has to go to any Rudolf song except Asylum Street Spankers’ Hoochie Koochie Man version

The Temptations did a good version, and there's a version by Billy May's orchestra on Capital Records that's pretty hilarious.

[Ann Archy]

LOL!!!!!!

[weegee]

We three kings
Of Orient are
Trying to smoke
an El Ropo Cigar
It was loaded
and it exploded
and none of us are
no more...

Anyone else remember it that way (decades old)

[Ann Archy]

THANK YOU AGAIN!!!!!!

[weegee]

Jerry: “You cry, and then you cry again...”

[william clark]

Any instrumental version of The Twelve Days of Christmas, because without the lyrics it really begins to sound like a stuck record

[CharlieOK1]

beat ya to it. Surprised we are the only two to have mentioned it!

[redangus]

I would put “Oh Little Town of Bethlehem and Away in A Manger” in that group also. I like all those song when properly song, but little children versions drive me up a wall.

[weegee]

There was a local parody at the time “Thank you all, for lowering our tax brackets, we thank you alll, for lowering our tax brackets...”

[allmendream]

To the tune of “Winter Wonderland” (with a well defined Balmer (from Baltimore) accent) (Essex isn’t a nice neighborhood)

Oh, by the way, hey did you know
Tomorrow night, we’re playing bingo
It’s a beautiful sight, we’re going bowling tonight
We’re walkin in an Essex Wonderland

Down the plant, we got the day off
Cuz the foreman got his payoff
We’re drinkin’ all day
We been wizzing away
We’re walkin in an Essex Wonderland

Let me tell you sumpin at this time, hon
Essex is da only place to be
While you’re at it you should get your hair done
And bleach it blonde so all the folks’ll see

We’re gettin Hazel to make some eggnog
In the fireplace, we’ll burn a fake log
Little Butchie will cry
Eatin rum pumpkin pie
We’re walkin in an Essex Wonderland

Joey’s home from the service
And his girlfriend is gettin nervous
While he was at sea
She contracted VD
They’re walkin in an Essex Wonderland

You can make and ornament from a Bud can
And then you’se can hang it from the tree
“Sherry are you pregnant?” she’ll say “No, man”
“But I’m thirteen, so ain’t it time to be?”

We’re calling Donnie up in jail
We’re raising money to post his bail
Iron Maiden is cranked
And Uncle Jimmy is tanked
We’re walkin in an Essex Wonderland
We’re walkin in an Essex Wonderland

Happy Holidees, Hon

[tioga]

we have a local radio station that plays ONLY Christmas songs for the season and they start before Thanksgiving........I LOVE it! I must be the only one...LOL

[weegee]

Any instrumental version of The Twelve Days of Christmas, because without the lyrics it really begins to sound like a stuck record

Dun da dun dunna dun dun dun dun dun dun dun da...
Dun dunna dun
Dun dunna dun
Dun dunna dun
Dun dunna dun
Dun dunna dun
Dun dunna dun
Dun dunna dun
Dun dunna dun...

[MCH]

The ones I originally came up with when I started reading this post looks like they've mostly been covered already:

Elmo & Patsy - Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer
John Denver - Please Daddy Don't Get Drunk This Christmas
Anyone - 12 Days of Christmas (right up there with 100 bottles of beer on the wall)
NewSong - The Christmas Shoes (way too depressing for Christmas)
Singing Dogs - Jingle Bells
Anyone - Fum Fum Fum (inane)
Ames Brothers - Good King Wenceslas

BTW, one of the best that's very little know is "Solder's King" by Donny Osmond. Also really like Narada, John Tesh and John Williams' soundtrack from Home Alone. IMHO, some of the best Christmas music artists are folks I wouldn't normally listen to at all. And, how can anyone NOT like Mannheim Steamroller :o)? C'mon you guys!

[Biggirl]

“Grama Got Ran Over By A Reindeer” is my most annoying Christmas song.

[Slings and Arrows]

[mupcat]

That is probably the most beautiful Christmas song I’ve ever heard! You just don’t hear it that often, and I had forgotten about it. Thanks so much for posting the link. Only problem is it should come with a warning of having Kleenex near by. Whew-—just amazing.

[knittnmom]

The thing that annoys me about that song is that, yes, for heaven’s sake, she did know! An angel told her, she accepted the responsibility knowing the consequences. Yeesh.