Stop Setting Alarms on My Biological Clock

Newsweek via MSNBC ^ | 07/19/2007 | Carrie Friedman

[RockinRight]

July 23, 2007 issue - I am at a party chatting with a woman I know slightly. As her young son squirms out of her embrace, she slips her hand under my shirt. She's not getting fresh with me. She's touching my tummy with her cold hand and asking me, in a concerned voice, "Why aren't you pregnant yet?" I smile, break free from her touch, and head to the food table to fill said empty belly with her brat's birthday cake. I love children and definitely plan on having them. Maternal instinct is oozing out of my pores: I've infantilized my dogs; I've gotten down on my hands and knees at the park with babies I barely know. My marriage is wonderful and solid, and we are both blessed with good health. I've been a nanny, a teacher, a youth-group leader. I've taken childhood-development courses solely for the purpose of someday raising happy, balanced children. I have always looked forward to becoming a mother. So why don't I have kids or even the inkling right now? It's because of you. Yes, you: the fanatical mothers of the world.

[RockinRight]

You USED to be my friend. Hhhmmph.

[CholeraJoe]

You can do better than that lame excuse.

"I got my nuts blown off by an IED in Iraq."

"I'm gay."

"The dog ate my testicles."

"Until Emma Watson turns 18, no other woman shall have my seed."

[Tijeras_Slim]

How about an embarassing roller disco accident in the shower?

[socialismisinsidious]

It was not a joke. I was there. Maybe the woman who touched this woman's belly was "just joking"

If you say everyone should have 2 or no kids as well, and if they choose not to they're ruining the environment or something, that's wrong.

Personally, I don't care how many kids you have or don't have. And I don't think it says anything about you one way or another.

[RockinRight]

"Until Emma Watson turns 18, no other woman shall have my seed."

Don't tell Donna.

[Millee]

Bwahahahahaha!!!!

[CholeraJoe]

That’s more like it.

[Allegra]

"My ovaries are on strike."

"Have you seen a big star in the east lately?"

"Well, I thought I was pregnant once, but it turned out to be indigestion. No more Italian sausage pizzas at 2 a.m. for me..."

"His swimmers haven't advanced out of the wading pool yet."

Oh, and the #1 reason...

"I'm not married and I'd kind of prefer that my kids grow up with a mom AND a dad." Yes, that matters to me. ;-)

[RockinRight]

Personally, I don't care how many kids you have or don't have. And I don't think it says anything about you one way or another.

Well then we're on the same page, FRiend.

It wasn't a joke. That was rude then.

Now, if said woman was on her 7th kid WITH A 7TH MAN AND ON WELFARE, THEN I might say something since it would be likely I'm supporting them with my tax dollars...but that's another subject entirely.

[CholeraJoe]

Good ones!

[RockinRight]

The “not married” reason doesn’t fly with the Prude Squad. They think you should marry the first a-hole you meet at age 20 and then be a good little submissive wife.

[socialismisinsidious]

Awww, come on, I loved every one of those men! ; )

One man 21 years, 7 kids, no welfare.

[RockinRight]

I wouldn’t think YOU were one of them! You’re a conservative!
:)

[Tatze]

[Tatze]

Why? Wanna witness it?

Why not? I'm sure Millee's got 37 seconds she can spare.

Isn't that a little generous?

[Sax]

The mommies who define themselves completely by motherhood and have that competitive, ‘I’m the best mommy’ attitude, damn near always have screwed up kids, usually with poor social skills and little or no ability to be self-reliant. Doesn’t bother me, just kind of funny in an ironic sort of way because they always seem to be so blind to it.

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

FREERIDERS RULE!!!

[RockinRight]

The “soccermom” types?

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

No one could possibly love your kids as much as you do, so stop inflicting them on others.

My favorite line of the piece....

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

That was you???