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top 24 Jack Bauer facts
dynamicobjects.com ^ | 4-2-2006 | diego's weblog

Posted on 05/11/2007 7:00:37 AM PDT by bedolido

-- If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Mayers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.

-- 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.

-- Jack Bauer could get off the Lost island in 24 hours.

-- Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.

-- Jack and Jill went up the hill. Only Jack came down. Jill was a terrorist.

-- The only reason you're conscious right now is because Jack Bauer doesn't want to carry you.

-- Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.

-- There were originally five horsemen of the apocalypse. Jack Bauer said he would travel by foot.

-- Jack Bauer sleeps with a gun under the pillow. But he could kill you with the pillow.

-- When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack found it and put it back.

-- After running out of ammo, Jack stood in the line of fire, took 3 shots to the chest, and used them to reload.

-- A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Minister walked into a bar... and Jack Bauer is going to find out why...

-- Jack Bauer has no friends, because as a child when he would play cops and robbers, the robbers would all be interogated and killed.

-- Nostradamus once predicted in his journal: "In the century 21st, the one known as Jacques will be the savior of the world... five seasons in a row." Moments later, Jack Bauer knocked down the door, shot Nostradamus in the kneecaps, and yelled "WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR?!"

-- When life hands Jack Bauer Lemons, he kills Terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade.

-- As a boy, Jack Bauer interrogated his parents on Easter until they revealed the location and contents of each hidden egg.

-- Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.

-- Jack Bauer has been to Mars. Thats why there's no life on Mars.

-- On Jack Bauers Tax Returns, he has to claim the entire world as his dependants.

-- Jack Bauer can eat just one Lay's Potato Chip. Don't tell Jack what he can't do.

-- Superman has Jack Bauer pajamas.

-- Jack Bauer is the reason Waldo is hiding.


TOPICS: Conspiracy; Health/Medicine; Humor; TV/Movies
KEYWORDS: 24; facts; jackbauer; top

1 posted on 05/11/2007 7:00:38 AM PDT by bedolido
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To: bedolido

Thanks for the Friday morning smiles.


2 posted on 05/11/2007 7:04:49 AM PDT by DCPatriot ("It aint what you don't know that kills you. It's what you know that aint so" Theodore Sturgeon))
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To: bedolido

Jack Bauer wears Chuck Norris pajamas...


3 posted on 05/11/2007 7:11:13 AM PDT by JRios1968 (This tagline brought to you by courtesy of Happygrl)
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To: bedolido

bump


4 posted on 05/11/2007 7:23:20 AM PDT by Tuscaloosa Goldfinch (If MY people who are called by MY name -- the ball's in our court, folks.)
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To: Tuscaloosa Goldfinch

good laugh, thanks


5 posted on 05/11/2007 8:22:43 AM PDT by Shimmer128 (Arrogance is no substitute for vision.)
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To: JRios1968

But Chuck Norris wears Fred Thompson pajamas...


6 posted on 05/11/2007 8:23:16 AM PDT by Little Ray (Rudy Guiliani: if his wives can't trust him, why should we?)
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To: Little Ray

“But Chuck Norris wears Fred Thompson pajamas”

...but Jessica Biel is wearing MY PAJAMAS..........

/s


7 posted on 05/11/2007 8:42:43 AM PDT by TheRobb7 (Liberalism exists to silence people who don't agree.)
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To: TheRobb7
...but Jessica Biel is wearing MY PAJAMAS..........

I happen to know Jessica doesn't wear pajamas. ;0)

8 posted on 05/11/2007 8:49:14 AM PDT by BigCinBigD (You "abort" bad missile launches and carrier landings. Not babies.)
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To: BigCinBigD

touche’ my FRiend!


9 posted on 05/11/2007 9:02:35 AM PDT by TheRobb7 (Liberalism exists to silence people who don't agree.)
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To: Little Ray

Fred Thompson wears Ronaldus Magnus pajamas...


10 posted on 05/11/2007 11:56:42 AM PDT by JRios1968 (This tagline brought to you by courtesy of Happygrl)
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