Posted on 04/22/2007 4:03:07 PM PDT by Tall_Texan
Remember the 1960s hit "Harper Valley PTA" by Jeannie C. Riley? It dawned on me that we could craft a parody song to reflect today's educrat types. I'm not satisfied with all the lyrics here so I'm asking for help. Change it however it suits you. If it doesn't totally suck, we can try to get Paul Shanklin or somebody to record it.
Well, the note said "Mrs. Johnson, your SUV has a sticker praising Bush.
It's reported you've attended Bible studies and are listening to Rush
And we don't believe you ought to be a bringin' up your little girl this way."
And it was signed by the Secretary, Harper Valley PTA.
Well, it happened that the PTA was gonna meet that very afternoon.
And they were sure surprised when Mrs. Johnson brought her .22 into the room.
And as she walked up to the blackboard I can still recall the words she had to say.
She said "I'd like to address this meeting of the Harper Valley PTA."
"Well, there's Bonnie Taylor sittin' there and seven times she's asked me for a date.
And I would tell her where to go but she'd just claim I had done a crime of hate.
And Mister Baker, can you tell us why your babysitter had to leave this town?
And shouldn't Greta Jones stop lying that the polar bears will all completely drown?"
"Well Mr. Harper couldn't be here 'cause he's out with his new boyfriend he calls 'Seth'.
And if you smell Shirley Thompson's breath you'll find that she's been dabbling in meth.
And then you have the nerve to tell me you think that as a mother I'm not fit.
Well this is just a PC loonyland and you're all Harper Valley nitwits."
No, I wouldn't put you on because it really did, it happened just this way.
The day my momma punked the asses of the Harper Valley PTA.
The day my momma punked the asses of the Harper Valley PTA.
===========================
I know this could be better, so give it your best shot.
Just looking at the scansion (fit of words with rhythm) I’d change “SUV” to “pickup” or “Hummer.”
In the 4th verse, I’d use “claim THAT I had done a crime of hate.”
In the last verse, you need a 3-syllable word in place of “nitwits.”
(Gol-lee this makes me feel old!)
I’m not sure which Valley you are speaking of. Is it two syllables? Silicon valley? San Joaquin Valley? Napa Valley?
This looks like a job for Doug from Upland
Calling Doug, Doug report to this thread please...LOL
Good.
In the 4th verse, I’d use “claim THAT I had done a crime of hate.”
Better. It's still awkwardly-worded.
In the last verse, you need a 3-syllable word in place of “nitwits.”
Well, the real verse is "hypocrites" but these liberals aren't exactly hypocrites. "Id-i-ots", maybe?
Not to mention another clever resident wordsmith...
I’ve tried to get songs recorded for years. Shanklin is certainly not going to do it.
If you said it, "Id-ee-its" it would rhyme :-).
Record it yourself. It ain’t hard.
Can you sing at all?
I thought this would be something you would be able to help with.
You have a way with the catchy lingo....
I cannot sing.
If you have good midi's I could help you out some if you want. They won't be studio quality but they are good for a laugh or two. If I get a really good one sometimes I will take it to the studio.
Passably. But I'm not a woman and I have no way to circulate a song (other than here). It's just a parody I've been kicking around my head today. I was hoping somebody else would pick up the ball and run with it. I'm not looking for credit - just want to get the idea out there.
The original concept was how Mrs. Johnson encountered a busybody hypocritical teacher's group and told them off by wearing a mini-skirt they thought was immoral.
Well, in many communities, the "conservatives" are now considered the immoral ones who aren't following the dictates of political correctness and environmentalism so I wanted to take the *new* Mrs. Johnson and have her verbally attack the new PTA, illustrating who now controls our schools and how they are just as intolerant and intrusive as the fictional 1960s PTA was portrayed.
I'd really rather go after a school board or a teacher's union but they just don't rhyme very well.
There's not much money in parodies. Unless you hook up with a big radio personality or sell your own CD's mostly you just do it because you like it or want to say something about our culture. I don't think it matters that you're not a woman.
"I have no way to circulate a song"
Now days good stuff circulates itself. It's a good parody.
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