Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

You simply cannot make this stuff up!

I hope everyone enjoys the humor break, and that y'all have a happy, healthy and prosperous 2007.

1 posted on 12/29/2006 10:13:10 AM PST by Ancesthntr
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies ]


To: Ancesthntr
The world sits on the back of a turtle.

Ergo, global warming is caused by turtle farts.

2 posted on 12/29/2006 10:15:05 AM PST by Lazamataz (I just want to be loved from the bellybutton down. Is that so wrong?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr
Ah, the dreaded slow but deadly.

Instead of posting this as breaking news, we should have a new category titled "The Passing Scene."
3 posted on 12/29/2006 10:15:51 AM PST by Hillarys Gate Cult (The man who said "there's no such thing as a stupid question" has never talked to Helen Thomas.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr; Allegra; ErnBatavia

Oh Yeah!!


4 posted on 12/29/2006 10:15:57 AM PST by wazoo1031
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

Oh man! Brussel Sprouts.


5 posted on 12/29/2006 10:16:35 AM PST by BunnySlippers (SAY YES TO RUDY !!!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

Turtle #1: How are we going to get those guys to give us more brussels sprouts?

Turtle #2: I don't know. Go fart in the water level detector. See what that will do.


6 posted on 12/29/2006 10:17:22 AM PST by samtheman (The Democrats are the DhimmiGods of the New Religion of PC)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

Must have been Shell Gas.


7 posted on 12/29/2006 10:17:31 AM PST by andy58-in-nh
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

Cowabunga!


9 posted on 12/29/2006 10:26:30 AM PST by labette (Through Him all things were made; without Him nothing was made ...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

Didn't know Ted Kennedy was visiting that aquarium.


10 posted on 12/29/2006 10:27:28 AM PST by navyguy (We don't need more youth. What we need is a fountain of SMART.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

The turtle blamed the dogfish.


14 posted on 12/29/2006 10:32:24 AM PST by Redcloak (Speak softly and wear a loud shirt.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

it would make a cute short story. I can just see her sitting there a bit worried watching the turtle and then poof, one bubble, poof, two bubble, and the look on her face, which must have been priceless--and no one around to laugh with, but her sitting there laughing all alone--the turtle farting away nonchalantly. Poor guy, it must 'av hurt a bit with all that noxious gas.


15 posted on 12/29/2006 10:35:58 AM PST by GOP Poet
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

Affects my brother the same way.


17 posted on 12/29/2006 10:59:44 AM PST by Chickensoup (If you don't go to the holy war, the holy war will come to you.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr
Fire alarm yet a high water level sensor? Seems contradictory. Fire and water do not tend to play well together.
19 posted on 12/29/2006 11:12:21 AM PST by NonValueAdded (Prayers for our patriot brother, 68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub, now more than ever my FRiends.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

You're pretty darn bad off when the best thing you have to look forward to is Brussels Sprouts for Christmas!

That fact itself makes me feel better as I sit here eating my green bean casserole. I'm a High Roller, baby!!!


23 posted on 12/29/2006 7:02:41 PM PST by djf (All illegal aliens deserve a free ride - a bus ticket to Washington, DC.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr; wazoo1031; ErnBatavia
"As I watched, a few large bubbles emerged from beneath him and rose to the surface next to the tube. Straight away, I realised what must have happened.

Cool BEANS! ;-)

24 posted on 12/29/2006 8:20:33 PM PST by Allegra (Vote Dulcie / Finbar 2008)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: Ancesthntr

My brother used to have a fifth wheel camper he kept parked above a river in the NC mountains. When my kids were little we'd visit and they'd run to the methane detector whenever they had to cut one. Hilarity ensued every time there was a BEEP BEEP BEEP!


27 posted on 12/30/2006 8:02:00 AM PST by Rb ver. 2.0
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article


FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson