Silly Songs: I Love My Lips
Posted on 09/01/2006 12:50:57 AM PDT by sully777
It's been a long summer. The workload has increased as the hairline decreased. There is a change in the weather this week that seems to mark the start of autumn. Time to push aside the paperwork, the reports, the bills, and the everyday world of life. Time to start something nutty...
...if you've ever emailed or ICQed your roommate.
...if you know more people online than in person.
... if you feel naked without a keyboard.
...if you carry a voltmeter with you.
...if you get excited when someone mentions vectors.
...if you know more than one programming language.
...if you can carry on conversations in C++.
...if you talk to your computer and it doesn't seem to be listening.
...if you can convert English into binary, hexadecimal, and octal.
...if you've taken apart your alarm clock and reprogrammed it to read in Klingon.
...if you make friends by fixing people's computers.
...if you consistently stay after class to talk to the professor because you find him/her incredibly interesting.
...if you have a drawer full of spare hard drives.
...if you print out your math homework on your computer.
...if you calculate the time dilation between you and the earth on a transcontinental flight.
...if you wear a necktie because it's stylish and "chicks dig it."
...if you're not quite sure what a chick is.
...if you go to a school with the words "Institute of Technology" in the name.
...if your SAT score was higher than your total income for that year.
...if you know pi to more than 4 significant digits.
...if you know your IQ to more than 2 significant digits.
...if you know what significant digits are.
...if you can convert any quantity from mks to cgs in your head.
...if you understood that last indicator.
...if you've read more books than your local librarian.
...if the majority of your personal library consists of Arthur C. Clarke, Isaac Asimov, and Newton.
3 woids...
Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!
Shalom.
Does anyone remember the summer when Taco Bell had a promotion that you could win gas by playing in their contest.
I kid you not - I got a plastic cup that said, "Eat at Taco Bell, Win Free Gas!"
Shalom.
OK, to fit non-computer nerds, the following chnages are needed!!!!
You might be a nerd if...
...if you've ever emailed or ICQed your roommate.
...if you know more people online than in person.
... if you feel naked without a calculator and mechanical pencil.
...if you carry a voltmeter with you.
...if you get excited when someone mentions rockets, and airplanes.
...if you nearly get into or cause wrecks looking at power plants.
...if you can continually re-calculate your miles driven, miles to go, and gas mileage while driving anywhere. Then begin converting to metric when that gets old.
...if you talk to your computer and it doesn't seem to be listening.
...if you've taken apart your alarm clock and reprogrammed it to read in Klingon.
...if you make friends by fixing people's cars.
...if you consistently stay after class to talk to the professor because you find him/her incredibly interesting.
...if you have a drawer full of spare hard drives.
...if you print out your math homework on your computer.
...if you calculate the time dilation between you and the earth on a transcontinental flight.
...if you wear a necktie because it's stylish and "chicks dig it."
...if you're not quite sure what a chick is.
...if you go to a school with the words "Institute of Technology" in the name.
...if your SAT score was higher than your total income for that year.
...if you know pi to more than 4 significant digits.
...if you know your IQ to more than 2 significant digits.
...if you know what significant digits are.
...if you can convert any quantity from mks to cgs in your head.
...if you understood that last indicator.
...if you've read more books in a year than your local librarian does in her entire lifetime.
...if the majority of your personal library consists of Arthur C. Clarke, Isaac Asimov, Robert Heinlein, and Newton
John Lennon.
I thought this was supposed to be a silly thread. You about made me bawl over here with that. Snap out of it.
Present!
Last full weekday before the teenager returns to school and our lives return to some sort of normal schedule!
Woo hoo!
"The game is afoot, Trebek."
If you own more than one digital camera,
You might be a nerd.
If you buy refills for your ballpoint pen,
You might be a nerd.
If you spent your vacation at a computer show and convention,
You might be a nerd.
If this was the most exciting vacation you’ve ever had,
You might be a nerd.
If you sometimes forget to leave work at quitting time,
You might be a nerd.
If your tie and socks match,
You might be a nerd.
If you understand your palm pilot better than you understand people,
You might be a nerd.
If you have a spare pair of horn-rimmed glasses,
You might be a nerd.
If you have more than one home computer and all of them work,
You might be a nerd.
If they are networked,
You might be a nerd.
If the network is wireless,
You might be a nerd.
If you ever spell check your "to do" list,
You might be a nerd.
If you enter the unrecognized words into the dictionary,
You might be a nerd.
If you sleep with a pocket calculator in your pajama pocket,
You might be a nerd.
If you save your brown paper lunch bag and reuse it,
You might be a nerd.
If you work for the government, an accounting firm, or a bank,
You might be a nerd.
You think accuracy is more important than speed,
You might be a nerd.
If you keep spare batteries for your flashlight,
You might be a nerd.
If you subscribe to a crossword puzzle magazine,
You might be a nerd.
If your favorite TV program is the Weather Channel,
You might be a nerd.
If you wear your work ID card at home,
You might be a nerd.
If you've programmed your security system to accept it,
You might be a nerd.
If you have any friends that are auditors, programmers, or embezzlers,
You might be a nerd.
If you always remember to floss when you brush,
You might be a nerd.
If you understand the metric system, quantum mechanics, and HTML,
You might be a nerd.
You have 25 electronic gadgets and actually know how to work them all,
You might be a nerd.
If all of their clocks are set,
You might be a nerd.
If all of their clocks are set to the same time,
You might be a nerd.
If you have a picture of your mother on your desk,
You might be a nerd.
If you are allergic to cats, plants, mold, dust, and latex,
You might be a nerd.
If you ever wear brown shoes with black pants,
You might be a nerd.
If your emergency supplies include a glare screen and a tiny screwdriver,
You might be a nerd.
If other nerds envy your taste in pocket protectors,
Might as well admit it, you're a nerd!
Shalom.
If you have stock options that are actually worth money,
You might be working for a nerd.
Shalom.
Wasting away again in Margaritaville,
Searching for my lost shaker of salt.
Some people claim
That there's a woman to blame.
But I know
What blame? Is there a problem or something? What are you doing with your life that's so important?
With apologies to Jimmy Buffett
Shalom.
I think I'd like this old fart!
A very self-important college freshman attending a recent football game, took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation.
"You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one," the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear. "The young people of today grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon, our spaceships have visited Mars...We have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing ..and," pausing to take another drink of beer...
The Senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said, "You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young........so we invented them. Now, you arrogant little shithead, what are you doing for the next generation?"
I love senior citizens
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.