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Mensa's New Words for 2005 (humor)
e-mail to PA Times | 9/12/05 | unknown

Posted on 09/12/2005 3:49:22 PM PDT by pissant

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing of one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are the 2005 winners:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a**hole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.


TOPICS: Business/Economy
KEYWORDS: ancientpost; doasearch; mensa; mensapissant; wapo
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To: pissant

I like #4 becaue I have not heard anyone say "What in Tarnation" in years! I never understood what tarnation menat....but sure do like the word.


21 posted on 09/12/2005 4:34:33 PM PDT by Feiny (I am not mean. You're just a sissy.)
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To: Chickensoup

Who do you think these people are? Mensas? ;o)


22 posted on 09/12/2005 4:41:25 PM PDT by pissant
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To: marmar

Are you just stirring up trouble tonight! ;o)


23 posted on 09/12/2005 4:41:52 PM PDT by pissant
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To: Apparatchik

I think not!


24 posted on 09/12/2005 4:42:10 PM PDT by pissant
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To: The SISU kid

Catasstrophy: What you keep to memorialize catching the feline who's been yowling under your window all night.


25 posted on 09/12/2005 4:42:47 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (Go Sharon! And take Peres with you!)
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To: feinswinesuksass

I've always suspected it was a hillbilly contraction of "the entire nation".
[with the "tire" in entire pronounced "tar", naturally]...;))


26 posted on 09/12/2005 4:42:47 PM PDT by Salamander (There's nothing that "MORE COWBELL!" can't fix.......)
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To: theDentist

Kennetee: part man part fat sea creature.


27 posted on 09/12/2005 4:43:06 PM PDT by pissant
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To: feinswinesuksass

That was one of Yosemite Sam's favorite lines!


28 posted on 09/12/2005 4:43:32 PM PDT by pissant
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To: pissant

"I think not!"

Careful pissant...Rene' Descartes once said that...and -vanished-!...;D


29 posted on 09/12/2005 4:44:06 PM PDT by Salamander (There's nothing that "MORE COWBELL!" can't fix.......)
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To: pissant

Your asking me???????????? I never stir the pot.....


30 posted on 09/12/2005 4:44:20 PM PDT by marmar (435 CASF..Ramstien Germany.....Bringing the Wounded Warriors Home....)
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To: pissant

Guitard: Moron who thinks his future lies in playing 32nd-note ladder riffs and grimacing.


31 posted on 09/12/2005 4:46:51 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (Go Sharon! And take Peres with you!)
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To: pissant; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; Old Sarge; SandyInSeattle; Darksheare; ...
DUmbkopf: Official title of William Rivers Pitt.
---
This-Is-Not-A-Ping-List ping!

[Freepmail me to get on or off this Not-A-Ping-List.]

32 posted on 09/12/2005 4:50:06 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (Go Sharon! And take Peres with you!)
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To: apackof2

Puposterous: When Muttly denies knowing anything about the pic-a-nic basket.


33 posted on 09/12/2005 5:10:48 PM PDT by PoorMuttly (A strong body makes the mind strong. As to the species of exercises, I advise the gun -T.Jefferson)
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To: Clemenza
Kinda disappointing, as I have met some hotties at Mensa meetings, although it remains a heavily male environment.

I think women are too smart to waste their time on such things. ;-)

34 posted on 09/12/2005 5:20:26 PM PDT by Gondring (I'll give up my right to die when hell freezes over my dead body!)
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To: pissant
Although you'd believe the amens from a manse might belong to someone in Mensa, by no means would you think Natalie Manes is among the names of their membership...
35 posted on 09/12/2005 5:26:48 PM PDT by mikrofon (Dumocrat == A member of a minor, dying political party w/o a clue)
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To: Salamander

I'm obviously not a candidate for Mensa!


36 posted on 09/12/2005 5:27:56 PM PDT by pissant
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To: Slings and Arrows

Hehehe. I like that one!


37 posted on 09/12/2005 5:34:07 PM PDT by pissant
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To: marmar

Uh-huh. You are the picture of innocence 'round here! Of course, too many Pissant threads may tarnish that halo! ;o)


38 posted on 09/12/2005 5:35:21 PM PDT by pissant
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To: mikrofon

ooooooo. Very good. I think you get a free week's membership! ;o)


39 posted on 09/12/2005 5:42:23 PM PDT by pissant
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To: pissant

Geek humor!


(The scary thing is, I think it's funny!)


40 posted on 09/12/2005 5:43:02 PM PDT by wimpycat (Hyperbole is the opiate of the activist wacko.)
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