Posted on 08/12/2005 2:23:28 PM PDT by birbear
From my email... sorry if it's a dupe:
Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican? Here is a little test that will help you decide. Question: How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans And Southern Republicans?
The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
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Democrat's Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this! with so me friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Republican's Answer:
BANG!
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Southern Republican's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"
Funny. ;)
John Kerry's response...he shoves Mamma T toward the terrorist and calls his mistress to see if she's available for dinner.
LOL love it! LOL
Silver tips are hollow points.
I guess I'm not a Southern Republican.
I don't have a daughter.
Doesn't this rule out being a Democrat?
Hey, oldies ARE goodies. I'm glad to see this posted for all those that haven't had the opportunity to ROTFLTAO.
You left out homemade slugs cast out of melted down truck batteries, hollow pointed on a Big Lots, $39.95 drill press, with the cavity resulting filled with stump whipped chitlins, sealed with Dollar Store epoxy, and loaded over a suitable amount of 2400! Other than that, right on! If this load doesn't kill them outright, it at least protects 72 virgins, and a whole bunch of innocent young boys!
They welcome death, but only so long as death is limited by their standards. Never, ever, believe that mooselimbs are fearless, just focus on the things that scare them the most, and watch them go back to molesting goats.
I like it.
BTTT
Ok, I'm in deep doodoo here, I never carry a Glock. I don't own a Glock! It's either my Savage, S&W, or Kimber.
I would need to ask for a rule clarification.
Can I shoot the guy with interchangable ammo that would have fit my Glock had I owned one???
If not, we need more classifications. :-)
The above scenario is completely unrealistic since it posits, "You are carrying a Glock cal .40..."
Those Glock .40 things are for those southern Republicans who live way, way up north in towns like Richmond, Charleston, Atlanta, Little Rock and Shreveport.
Of course the gun stores around here do sell 'em, but mostly for teaching kids and yankee transplants, in other words, people who don't know much about shootin' real weapons.
See, there ya go!
That settles that! :-)
Where I'm at in Louisiana, we don't even need windshields.
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