What can you say to a judge?

June 3, 2005 | self / vanity

[The Other Harry]

I have recently got myself in a fair amount of trouble for a DUI. There is no question that I am guilty of the basic offense. I am willing to pay the fines and do the time. That all seems the way it should be.

What I would like to do, however, is to go into court (the next time), and express my sentiments to the judge.

These would not be real polite. I cannot repeat them here. Think of the worst things you could say to someone and you will be close.

My question is: How much more trouble can doing that get me into?

As of now, I figure I am messed-up either way. So, I would like to express my thoughts. They won't likely be anything he has heard in his court before.

[Dr.Hilarious]

Considering that you've admitted you're guilty of DUI, you have a lot of nerve even thinking of telling off a judge.

Why not just tell him off with every four-letter word you can think of? The extra fines he'll slap on you may kick some sense into that head of yours. Or maybe apologize for putting people in danger with your drunken behavior?

Seriously, you think you're going to get sympathy here for driving under the influence?

[martin_fierro]

My question is: How much more trouble can doing that get me into?

You could get a fine and/or some jail time to cool your jets.

I wouldn't push it were I you.

[thegreatbeast]

Don't be an idiot. Keep your tongue. Inside a courtroom a judge can fudge you up and make things worlds worse for you.
Behave.

[hole_n_one]

My experience is that you can pretty much say anything you want to a judge without fear of any consequence.

So, let 'er rip, and, with any luck, you'll be FReepin' again in time for the 2010 midterm elections.

[martin_fierro]

So, let 'er rip, and, with any luck, you'll be FReepin' again in time for the 2010 midterm elections.

LOL

[Treader]

Get drunk before your court appearance, so you will have the upper hand on the judge. Best way ta go...dude

[Robert_Paulson2]

WHY would you be wanting to pissoff the judge so?
Did he out drink at the bar or take your girlfriend?

It's just strange that you would want to ruin your life further by going into the lockup one second longer than you have to.

Did your dui relate to something OTHER than alcohol?

[hole_n_one]

Keywords run amok

[middie]

The viseral and transitory satisfaction that may be obtained from such an idiotic act will be vastly superceded by the vastly enhanced pain this jerk will experience in the slammer. The cretins who run county jails will note and take great joy in retribution for verbally assaulting a judge. Hey, knock yourself out and while you're at it find some way to shoot yourself in the other foot too.

[The Other Harry]

Did your dui relate to something OTHER than alcohol?

Expired stickers.

We won't be doing that again.

[bagocookies]

Dude, you'll get contempt of court and the judge will NOT be lenient with you! Do you want to go to jail?

[hole_n_one]

Expired stickers.

Well, that's an entirely different story.

There's no reason that you shouldn't unleash a verbal assault upon the sitting judge that would make Richard Pryor blush.

[vikzilla]

The goal is to win the war, not every battle.

Silence would seem to be the best strategery.

[Crazieman]

Hold muh beer

[Dallas59]

Are "series"? (serious). Just ram your car though the front of the court house...then step out and start cussing.

[Hetty_Fauxvert]

You can't say squat to a judge. They can slap you with "contempt of court," etc., which might involve not only fines but jail time, as others here have already observed.

What you *can* do, if the judge is an elected one and you feel he/she has been rampantly unfair, is find out who is running against this judge next time, and do everything in your power to support his/her campaign. Watching this judge go down in flaming defeat at election time would be much sweeter than spending time in jail yourself, wouldn't it?

[Lord Nelson]

There are some judges I'd like to give a piece of my mind to. The liberals on the Supreme Court.

I will try not to judge, because God know I too am a sinner, but you should humbly express your guilt. (If you are indeed guilty)

[Ronin]

Hey, why not instead, drop your pants, lay your willie on a chopping block and hand a cleaver to a hungry cannibal?

It's bound to be less painful in the long term, and since you are dumb enough to post this question online, there is considerable doubt that you should be reproducing.

[ConservativeMind]

I am messed-up either way.

So true on so many levels...