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PENIS CLOSES ROAD
Sky News ^ | May 25, 2005

Posted on 05/28/2005 4:32:09 AM PDT by billorites

A large fake penis has caused a major terror alert in America.

A key highway though Florida was closed after a driver spotted what looked like a pipe bomb under an overpass.

Fearing terrorists were trying to blow up the structure, police closed Interstate 75 for an hour.

But on closer inspection police found that the 'device' was actually a foot-long plastic penis.

"Someone took construction-grade plastic, moulded it into a penis and wrapped it with duct tape," said Lee County Sheriff's Chief Deputy Charles Ferrante.

The bomb squad was brought in to handle the situation and a remote-controlled robot used to make the fake penis safe.


TOPICS: Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: floridawatch; homelandsecurity
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To: billorites
From the title alone, I feared the wuurst.

Like a 50 foot long 500 ton monster penis snaking across the road. Or a really hard penis *holding up* the road literally (brave man sacrificing a vital function for the driving safety and/or comfort of other motorists).

Or a severely over-inflated love-blow-up-doll frightening the children (though, I think more than just the member would be scary).

Good to see it was only a giant dildo...

21 posted on 05/28/2005 5:09:09 AM PDT by Atheist_Canadian_Conservative
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To: billorites

Hysteria...LoL!


22 posted on 05/28/2005 5:12:51 AM PDT by demlosers
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To: Ichneumon

Perhaps it was equipped with a beret and presidential kneepads? Or was it the new Bobbit prototype that slices the 'package' into small pieces?


23 posted on 05/28/2005 5:14:49 AM PDT by chief_bigfoot ("isn't THAT amazing?" - Ron Popiel)
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To: billorites
PENIS CLOSES ROAD

Well, that's not something you see every day! Either on the road, or on FR!

Mark

24 posted on 05/28/2005 5:15:06 AM PDT by MarkL (I've got a fever, and the only prescription is MORE COWBELL!!!)
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To: billorites


Bwahahahahahahahah...I love this Country.


25 posted on 05/28/2005 5:18:02 AM PDT by SouthernFreebird
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To: billorites
Rename the thoroughfare:

"Via Agra"

26 posted on 05/28/2005 5:18:39 AM PDT by Young Werther
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To: billorites
So Interstate 75 is a hard road to travel.

I imagine if they find the perp who dropped the "pipe bomb," some stiff penalties may be implemented.

I just hope the judge isn't one of those wooden characters.

I am so sorry for this extremely flaccid attempt at (BAD!) humor...

27 posted on 05/28/2005 5:25:56 AM PDT by Allegra (It's Hotter'n A Whorehouse on Nickel Night)
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To: billorites
"THEY BLEW UP MY WHAT?!!?"


28 posted on 05/28/2005 5:27:45 AM PDT by quark
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To: billorites

Also reported in the news as

Suspicious package was fake foot-long plastic penis
"It looked like pipe bomb and was in a position that could cause structural damage." Ouch
http://www.news-press.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20050525/NEWS01/305250001/1002/NEWS01


29 posted on 05/28/2005 5:39:53 AM PDT by Smartaleck
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To: quark

News headline...Janet Reno observed on hands and knees along major highway searching for giant penis...AlGore was nowhere to be found.


30 posted on 05/28/2005 5:39:54 AM PDT by Route101
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To: cjshapi

Ping.


31 posted on 05/28/2005 5:45:17 AM PDT by Junior (“Even if you are one-in-a-million, there are still 6,000 others just like you.”)
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To: billorites

No picture posting here!


32 posted on 05/28/2005 5:46:30 AM PDT by Dallas59 (" I have a great team that is going to beat George W. Bush" John Kerry -2004)
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To: Route101

I don't think Butch Reno likes penises.


33 posted on 05/28/2005 5:59:52 AM PDT by Neville72
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To: Neville72

Compliments of the late,great John Holmes.


34 posted on 05/28/2005 6:44:51 AM PDT by hillyes
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To: billorites; Squantos; Eaker; TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig

phallic EOD ping


35 posted on 05/28/2005 8:45:19 AM PDT by Horatio Gates (Mullah al-Whipple says,"Don't squeeze the Koran." Safe for septic sytems.)
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To: Larry Lucido

Actually they piped in some conversation about baseball


36 posted on 05/28/2005 8:48:31 AM PDT by TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig (You can turn your head away from the Berg video and still hear Al Queda's calls to prayer.)
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To: shotokan

You know the patrol officers laughed when they saw it and then said, "you know, that COULD be a pipe bomb. We should call in the bomb squad."LOL


37 posted on 05/28/2005 8:51:31 AM PDT by TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig (You can turn your head away from the Berg video and still hear Al Queda's calls to prayer.)
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To: TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig

Whoever is responsible for this is a real dick. IMHO. 8>)


38 posted on 05/28/2005 8:54:38 AM PDT by Horatio Gates (Mullah al-Whipple says,"Don't squeeze the Koran." Safe for septic sytems.)
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To: quark

Janet Reno pic LOL! Great thinking on your part, good "Freeper Funny". :-)


39 posted on 05/28/2005 8:57:30 AM PDT by Lockbar (March toward the sound of the guns.)
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To: billorites

Was it wearing its hat or was it mutilated?


40 posted on 05/28/2005 9:04:24 AM PDT by hobson
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