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Posted on 04/23/2005 7:54:04 PM PDT by EveningStar
The Dialectizer takes text or other web pages and instantly creates parodies of them! Try it out by selecting a dialect, then entering a URL or English text...
(Excerpt) Read more at rinkworks.com ...
ping
I selected "moron".
I got the same thing back.
Preach it loud, bruddah!! Preach it loud, bruddah!! Right on!
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CLICK HERE (177KB) |
I did Kimberamerica (firearms) in redneck reads great
Heres some of it:
Kimber quality whar yo' need it most.
Small pistols present a host of design an' manufackurin' challenges. They muss be strong inough t'han'le th' same ammunishun as full size models, maintain absolute reliability an' be accurate wif a wide variety of ammunishun. Recoil also becomes an impo'tant facko'. Li'l pistols chambered fo' trimenjus calibers muss be corntrollable fum shot t'shot by shooters wif all levels of experience.
Ultra Carry pistols is th' smalless 1911 pistols evah manufackured, cuss it all t' tarnation. Mo'e impo'tantly, Kimber quality doesn’t fo'ce a choice between perfo'mance an' size. Th' slim 1911 profile makes them easy t'carry an' cornceal, ah reckon. On account o' a 1911 fits most han's better than enny other semi-autymatic design they haf a natural pointability thet brin's them t'targit faster. ...
ROTFLOL!
I absolutely LOVE "he'p". ;o)
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Suh Joh an influential politician: PM (conservative ex Premier of Aus state of Queenslan' dies)
Posted by NZerFumHK
On 04/23/2005 11:27:12 PM PDT
MCah Embraces Qwest's $9.75 Billy Joeion Takeovah Bid; Verizon Has Five Days t'Prodooce Better Offer
Posted by HAL9000
On 04/23/2005 11:19:46 PM PDT · 6+ views
Assosheeated Press | April 23, 2005 | Brooce Meyerson
NEW YORK (AP)
Sources: Grasso Ally Langone Mountin' Rival Bid Aginst NYSE fo' Archipelago
Posted by HAL9000
On 04/23/2005 11:15:17 PM PDT · 10+ views
Grams tells GOP group he's outta Senate race (Minnesota)
Posted by LdSentinal
On 04/23/2005 10:56:49 PM PDT · 39+ views
Red Star Tribune ^ | 4/24/05 |
to be, ro not tOb e,--that is teh quest1on:- - wehth3r 'tis nobler in teh Mind to suffer teh slings an darOrwds o foutrageous dortunme or tO take arms agAimst 4 Sea of rtoulbes, and bby oppoisng end them??????????????!!!!?????????????????? --t0 Drei,--to sleeop,-- no more; and by 4 sleep to sayy we end teh hertache,, and teh thosand n4tural shoX0rs Th4 tflEsh si jiue to,--'tis a ocnsummation devoutly t0 be wish"d~ to dfei,--tto sl3ep;-- to sleep!!!!!!!!!!1~~~~~~ LOLOLOLLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!~~~~ PPARCHANCE TO DREAm-:--AY, TEHRE'DS THE RUB; FOR N TH4T S7EEPOF DEAT H2H4T DREAMS MAY COME, WHEN WEE AHVE SHUFFLED OFF THIS MORATLL cOiL, UMST GIVE US PAUsE: THERE'S TEH RESPCET ThAT MAKE CALAmITY OF SO LONG LIFE; FOR WHO WOULD BEAR THE WHPS AND SCONRS OF TIME, THE OPPRESSOR's WRoNG, TEH PROUD MAN"S OCMTUMELY, TEDH PANGS OF DESPISD LOVE, TEH LAW"S DELAY, ETH INS0ELNCE OF OFf1CE, AND TEJH SpUNRS THAT PATEINT MErIT 0F TEH UNWOTHY TAKES, WHNEH E HIMSE7F MIGH THIS QEUITUS MAKEW W 1TJH A BARe BODKIN!?!?!?!?!? lolololollol!!!!!!!!~~~~~~~ loololololollololo!!!!!!!!1 wjho wold thes ef4rdeld bear, to grunt a|\|d sweat undatr a weary life, but that the dread of soemthing afTar death,-- teh undisoov3rd country,, froM wh0se bourn no teavellder Rerrns,--pzuzles the 2ill, and makes us rath3r bearr thosE ills we have than fly t0 otehrz That We know nOt of??????? thusc onsc3incE does make cowards Of us All; and thzu teh native huee 0f resolutioN 1s siX0tleid o'er w1th thep ale dasto f thought; and enterprisez of gr8 pitH and mome|\|t, with htis re4rd, theirc urrentst urn awry, and los ethe name of cation!!!!!!!!111~~~~~~~ OLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11~~~~~~~ --S0FT U NO~ W tHe fairt 0pheli!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111~~~~~~~ aahck thE lpannet ---ntymph, iN thy roisons b3 all my sins remmeberrd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1~~~~~~~
I've seen worse from DU'ers and from an opus or two, but this still struck me as funny.
This is really funny. I do sort of wonder if this is a DU communications tool. It kind of looks like the way they post. LOL.
Velcume-a tu Free-a Repoobleec!
Free-a Repoobleec is zee premeeere-a oonleene-a gezeereeng plece-a fur independent, gress-ruuts cunserfeteesm oon zee veb. Ve're-a vurkeeng tu rull beck decedes ooff gufernmentel lergesse-a, tu ruut oooot puleeticel frood und curroopshun, und tu chempeeun cooses vheech foorzeer cunserfeteesm in Emereeca. Und ve-a elveys hefe-a foon dueeng it. Um de hur de hur de hur. Huu-yeh!
Waiting for the "Dayam Yankee" version!
This is in Moron.
You's swine. You's vulgar little maggots. You's wo'dless bag uh fild. As we say in Texas, I'll bet ya' couldn't pour p! Right on!ss out uh a boot wid instrucshuns on de heel.
You's is a kinker. Ah be baaad... A so'e dat won't go away. Slap mah fro! ah' would rada' kiss some lawya' dan be seen wid ya'. Youse some putrescent mass, some walkin' vomit. Man! You's is a spineless little wo'm deservin' nodin' but da damn profoundest contempt. Man! You's is a jerk, some cad, some weasel. Yo' life be a monument t'stupidity. Slap mah fro! You's is a stench, some revulsion, some big suck on some sour lemon.
'S coo', bro. You's is a bleatin' foal, some curdled staggerin' mutant dwarf smeared richly wid de effluvia and offal accompanyin' yo' alleged bird into dis wo'ld. An insensate, blinkin' calf, meanin'ful t'nobody, abandoned by de puke-droolin', gigglin' beasts who sired ya' and denwasted demselves in recognishun uh whut dey had done. ah' gots'ta neva' get upside de embarrassment uh belongin' t'de same species as ya'. You's is a monster, an ogre, some malfo'mity. Slap mah fro! ah' barf at da damn very dought uh ya'.
You's gots all de appeal uh a sheet cut. Man! Lepuh's avoid ya'. You's is vile, wo'dless, less dan nodin'. You's is a weed, some fungus, de dregs uh dis eard. And dun did ah' menshun ya' smell? Try t'edit yo' responses uh unnecessary material befo'e attemptin' t'impress us wid yo' insight. Man! De evidence dat ya' is a nincompoop gots'ta still be available t'readers, but dey gots'ta be able t'access it mo'e rapidly. Slap mah fro!
You's snail-skulled little rabbit. Man! Would dat some hawk pick ya' down, roll its beak into yo' brain, and downon findin' it rancid set ya' loose t'fly briefly befo'e spatterin' de ocean rocks wid de frody pink shame uh yo' ignoble blood.
May ya' choke on de queasy, convulsin' nausea uh yo' own trite, honkyfoolish beliefs. You's is weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You's is grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You's is foul and disgustin'. Youse some honkyfool, an igno'amus. Monkeys look waaay down on ya'. Even sheep won't gots sex wid ya'.
You's is unreservedly alleyetic, starved fo' attenshun, and lost in some land dat reality fo'gots. And whut meanin' do ya' 'espect yo' delusionally self-impo'tant statements uh unknowin', in'sperienced opinion t'have wid us? Whut fantasy do ya' hold dat ya' would recon' dat yo' tiny-fisted tantrums would gots mo'e weight dan dat uh a leprous desert rat, spinnin' rabidly in some circle, waitin' fo' de bite uh de snake?
You's is a wuzte uh flesh. Lop some boogie. You's gots no rhydm. WORD! You's is ridiculous and obnoxious. You's is de mo'al equivalent uh a leech. Lop some boogie. You's is a livin' emptiness, some meanin'less void. You's is sour and senile. You's is a disease, ya' puerile, one-handed, slack-jawed, droolin', meatslappuh'. On some baaaad day youse some half-wit. Man! You's remind me uh drool.
You's is deficient in all dat lends character. Ah be baaad... You's gots de sucka'ality uh wallsheet. You's is dank and fildy. Slap mah fro! You's is asinine and benighted. You's is de source uh all unpleasantness. You's spread misery and so'row whereva' ya' go. 'S coo', bro. You's smarmy lagerlout git. Man! You's bloody woofta' sod. Bugga' off, pillock. Ya' know? You's grotty wankin' oik artless base-court apple-john. 'S coo', bro. You's clouted boggish foot-lickin' twit. Man! You's dankish clack-dish plonker. Ah be baaad... You's go'mless crook-pated tosser. Ah be baaad... You's churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You's cockered bum-bailey poofter. Ah be baaad... You's craven dewberry pisshaid cockup prattin' naff. You's gob-kissin' gleekin' flap-mouded coxcomb. Co' got d' beat! You's dread-bolted fobbin' beef-witted clappuh'-clawed flirt-gill.
You's is a fiend and some coward, and ya' gots baaaad bread. You's is degenerate, noxious and depraved. ah' feel debased plum fo' knowin' ya' 'esist. Man! ah' despise everydin' about ya', and ah' wish ya' would go away.
Slap mah fro! I kinnot recon' how incredibly stupid ya' are. ah' mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid, so's stupid it goes way beyond da damn stupid we know into some whole different dimension uh stupid. You's is trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so's far dat even de neutrons gots collapsed. Stupid gotsten so's dense dat no intellect kin escape. Rapularity stupid. Blazin' hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You's emit mo'e stupid in one second dan our entire galaxy emits in some year. Ah be baaad... Quasar stupid. Yo' writin' gots'ta be some troll. Nodin' in our universe kin real be dis stupid. Perhaps dis be some primo'dial fragment fum de o'iginal big bang uh stupid. Some pure essence uh a stupid so's uncontaminated by nuthin else as t'be beyond da damn laws uh physics dat we know, so cut me some slack, Jack. I'm so'ry. Slap mah fro! ah' can't go on. 'S coo', bro. Dis be an epiphany uh stupid fo' me.
Afta' dis, ya' may not hear fum me again fo' some while. ah' duzn't gots enough strengd left t'deride yo' igno'ant quesshuns and half baked comments about unimpo'tant trivia, o' any uh de rest uh dis rolll. Duh. Lop some boogie. De only doodad wo'se dan yo' logic be yo' manners. ah' have snipped away most uh whut ya' wrote, a'cuz, well... it dun didn't real say nuthin.
Yo' attempt at constructin' some creative post wuz pitiful. ah' mean, real, chittlin'in' togeda' a bunch uh insults among some load uh babblin' wuz hardly effective... Maybe lata' in life, afta' ya' gots learned t'read, scribble, spell, and count, ya' gots'ta mo'e success. True, dese is rudimentary skills dat many uh us "no'mal" sucka's snatch fo' granted dat everyone gots an easy time uh masterin'. But we sometimes fo'get dat dere is "challenged" sucka's in dis wo'ld who find dese doodads mo'e difficult. Man! If ah' had knode, dat dis wuz yo' case den ah' would gots neva' read yo' post. Man! It plum wouldn't gots been "right". Radical likes parkin' in some handicap space. ah' wish ya' de best uh luck in de emoshunal, and social struggles dat seem t'be placin' such some demand on ya'.
I miss the T'inator (Mr. T-speak). < |:(~
Free Republic is tha premiere online cruisin' place fo` independent, grass-roots conservizzles on tha web from tha streets of tha L-B-C. Were perpetratin' ta rizzoll back decades of governmizzles largesse, ta root out politizzle fraud n corruption, n ta champion causes which furtha conservizzles in America now pass the glock Anotha dogg house production.. And we always have fun doing it . Ill slap tha taste out yo mouf. Hoo-yah!
Text translated by Gizoogle
Bump for later.
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