Posted on 04/22/2005 7:37:04 PM PDT by SevenMinusOne
Rangers Versus Special Forces: Hostage Rescue
Discussion Board on this Military Joke
The Chief of Staff of the Army asked his Sergeant Major, who was both Ranger and Special Forces qualified, which organization he would recommend to form a new anti-terrorist unit. The Sergeant Major responded to the General's question with this parable: If there were a hijacked Boeing 747 being held by terrorists along with its passengers and crew and an anti-terrorist unit formed either by the Rangers or the Special Forces was given a Rescue/Recovery Mission; what would you expect to happen?
Ranger Option
Forces/Equipment Committed: If the Rangers went in, they would send a Ranger company of 120 men with standard army issue equipment.
Mission Preparation: The Ranger Company First Sergeant would conduct a Hair Cut and Boots Inspection, while the officers consulted SOPs and held sand table exercises.
Infiltration Technique: They would insist on double timing, in company formation, wearing their combat equipment, and singing cadence all the way to the site of the hijacked aircraft.
Actions in the Objective Area: Once they arrived, the Ranger company would establish their ORP, put out security elements, conduct a leaders recon, reapply their camouflage, and conduct final preparations for Actions on the OBJ.
Results of Operation: The Rescue/Recovery Operation would be completed within one hour; all of the terrorists and most of the passengers would have been killed, the Rangers would have sustained light casualties and the 747 would be worthless to anyone except a scrap dealer.
Special Forces Option
Forces/Equipment Committed: If Special Forces went in, they would send only a 12 man team (all SF units are divisible by 12 for some arcane historical reason) however, due to the exotic nature of their equipment the SF Team would cost the same amount to deploy as the Ranger Company.
Mission Preparation: The SF Team Sergeant would request relaxed grooming standards for the team. All members of the team would spend a grueling afternoon at a quality spa ensuring physical abilities would be honed.
Infiltration Technique: The team would insist on separate travel orders with Max Per Diem, and each would get to the site of the hijacking by his own means. At least one third of the team would insist on jumping in HALO.
Actions in the Objective Area: Once they arrived , the SF Team would cache their military uniforms, establish a Team Room at the best hotel in the area, use their illegal Team Fund to stock the unauthorized Team Room Bar, check out the situation by talking to the locals, and have a Team Meeting to discuss the merits of the terrorists' cause.
Results of Operation: The Rescue/Recovery Operation would take two weeks to complete and by that time all of the terrorists would have been killed, (and would have left signed confessions); the passengers would be ruined psychologically for the remainder of their lives; and all of the women passengers would be pregnant. The 747 would be essentially unharmed, the team would have taken no casualties but would have used up, lost, or stolen all the "high speed" equipment issued to them.
I guess you gotta be military to really appreciate the humor.
That's true - Or at least closely associated - There is a lot of truth in the joke (now only if they would have thrown in some of the jackas$ procedures put in by the JAGs who are ruining the military it could have been perfect).
And now for the rest of the story.....
Meanwhile, newly appointed Chairman of The Joint Chiefs of Staff, Marine General Pace sends in one United States Marine Corps Recon Team who kills all the terrorists, and saves the day.
Mission Accomplished.....
Semper Fi!
Regards,
Joe
PS - Good Joke though.... lol
You sir are an idiot...having been both SF & Ranger, I can tell you that your jocular approach to this situation is stupid!...You posted BS, and I'm calling you on it.
Have a great American day.
Naw, you just have to have read Black Hawk Down.
Either your wit was a little to dry on me and I'm not sensing your humor - Or I'm calling you on your claim. Because had you been either (SF or Ranger) you'd be laughing your as$ off.
While trotting past a double-timing unit of Airborn Rangers, a bunch of us soldierettes sang the cadance of, "I wanna' be an Airborn Ranger...Run like hell in the face of danger...Thunder and lightening make me cry."
It was evil, and I'm almost embarrassed. We had no idea how seriously the guys were about their well-deserved eliteness.
"You sir are an idiot...having been both SF & Ranger, I can tell you that your jocular approach to this situation is stupid!...You posted BS, and I'm calling you on it."
If you have actually been in the military, I would advise you to take a trip to the VA and see how hard it would be to have that stick removed.
Why would I be laughing my arse off? I don't see the humor in posting a joke such as this... Regardless, this type of competition between the two entities (SF is a branch for officers & enlisted, Ranger is MOS immaterial), is stupid, bullets hurt people...it is not a joke.
I don't see the humor...people die, others live!
Democratic response to everything....see the VA
Sir, move on (it's a joke) - You obviously have one sad life - and Thank god you are "former" - Best regards -
What was your point in doing it if you couldn't stand your ground?
So the SF guys are primadonnas...but still worth it.
Darn it! Beer out the nose! LOL!
Best Regards
Sergio
Sad Life...no, just attacking anyone who doesn't have a clue when posting "jokes"....have a great day...out here.
I'm sending the thread/link to my brother. He was a Ranger first then SF. He'll get a kick out of it.
Some rules for a SF guy are:
1 Dont get lost
2 Look cool
3 If lost, look cool, heh I always liked that one
Anyway, GreenCell, you would know there are plenty of differences in Ranger Regiment or in Group if you were in any of them. The thread joke has been in the military since time began so don't act like you haven't heard it before. So relax, and chill out.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.