Posted on 01/09/2005 5:46:48 PM PST by Ultra Sonic
Why? Can YOU think of anything to add to the list? And can you think of what John Kerry, Jacques Chirac...or perhaps Richard Simmons...would say? Post here! (Funny stuff)
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You To get to the other side.
George W. Bush We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.
Al Gore I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.
Colin Powell Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
Hanz Blix We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road.
Mohammed Aldouri (Iraq ambassador) The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.
Saddam Hussein This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
Ralph Nader The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
Pat Buchanan To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
Rush Limbaugh I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.
Martha Stewart No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
Dr. Seuss Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, But why it crossed, I've not been told!
Ernest Hemingway To die. In the rain. Alone.
Martin Luther King, Jr. I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
Grandpa In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
Barbara Walters Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.
John Lennon Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
Aristotle It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
Karl Marx It was an historical inevitability.
Voltaire I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.
Ronald Reagan What chicken?
Captain Kirk To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Fox Mulder You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
Sigmund Freud The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
Bill Gates I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
Albert Einstein Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
Bill Clinton I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?
Colonel Sanders I missed one?
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What can YOU think of?
The chicken crossed the road before he didn't cross the road. How bout that?
Bill Clinton: 'Cause I choked it left.
John Kerry: To collaborate with other chickens in the name of peace.
The Peacenik war protesters: To get to safety and avoid the unprovoked war of the Americans.
Gah. Pressed post instead of preview.
Repost.
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You: To get to the other side.
George W. Bush: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.
Al Gore: I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.
Colin Powell: Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
Hanz Blix: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road.
Mohammed Aldouri (Iraq ambassador): The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.
Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
Ralph Nader: The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
Pat Buchanan: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
Rush Limbaugh: I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.
Martha Stewart: No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
Dr. Seuss :Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, I've not been told!
Ernest Hemingway :To die. In the rain. Alone.
Martin Luther King, Jr.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
Grandpa: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
Barbara Walters: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.
John Lennon: Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
Aristotle: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
Karl Marx: It was an historical inevitability.
Voltaire: I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.
Ronald Reagan: What chicken?
Captain Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Fox Mulder: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
Sigmund Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
Bill Gates: I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
Albert Einstein: Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
Bill Clinton: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?
Colonel Sanders: I missed one?
Hillary Clinton: There is no road. We took it away from the chicken on behalf of the common good.
Sure was good with tater salad
Gilligan:
"The traffic started getting rough;"
The chicken had to cross.
If not for the plumage of its peerless tail
The chicken would be lost.
The chicken would be lost!"
Sir Isaac Newton:
"Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross the road."
Ayn Rand:
"It was crossing the road because of its own rational choice to do so. There cannot be a collective unconscious; desires are unique to each individual."
Michael Moore: The chicken is trying to cross the road because it made a mess of its coop. And to clarify how much of a mess it made, I've compiled several documentaries of facts easily proven to be false.
Bill Clinton: "I did not, and I repeat, I did not have sex with that chicken."
Abraham Lincoln: Four roads and seven miles ago, our chickens brought forth on this continent a new recipe.
Nostradamus: Chickens ferocious from hunger will run across roads, The greater part of the region will be against the Sanders, The great one will cause it to be dragged in a paper bucket, When the American Colonel will observe a culinary empire.
Al Bundy: "It was married... With children!"
Thomas de Torquemada: "Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out."
Buddha: "If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature."
Mark Twain: "The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated."
Dr. Emmett Brown: "Road? Where we're going we don't need roads!"
Rene Descartes: They think, therefore they cross.
Bill O'Reilly: To enter the No Fried Zone.
Ted Kennedy: To get out of the way of my car.
The Hulk: HULK SMASH CHICKEN!
Captain Picard: THERE ARE...FOUR...CHICKENS!
H.P. Lovecraft: To answer the call of Cthulu.
bttt
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