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Iran Urges Americans to Vote Democrat
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 4 October 2026 | John Semmens

Posted on 10/05/2026 10:14:51 AM PDT by John Semmens

The Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC) wrote a 26 page "open letter" to the American people saying "Islam requires believers to stand up to tyrants. By electing Democrats who will oust Trump from office the people of America will prove themselves worthy of membership in our faith and will not be killed after an Islamic regime supplants the evil, deceitful, and violent politicians who are responsible for America's current state."

The letter went on to assert that "the defeat of Zionist candidates by democratic socialists in this year's Democratic primary elections shows that more Americans are aligning themselves with the values and beliefs that Iran has been espousing and promoting around the world since our triumph in the 1979 revolution, the kidnapping of the members of the US embassy, and our righteous jihad against all infidels who resist becoming part of the Islamic Ummah. Americans who take action against Trump and his minions need not feel threatened by our promise of 'death to America' that your media have been broadcasting everywhere. The benevolence of our Supreme Leader will ensure you are spared."

IRGC spokesman Hossein Mohebbi added "we find much encouragement from the polls that show Democrats will take control of the House and Senate in America and will restore the magnanimous policies that prevailed under Presidents Obama and Biden. Both of these previous leaders saw that modern America has slipped into a pit of immorality and crime. Wives disobey their husbands. Homosexuals lure righteous men into sin. Mothers are empowered to murder their unborn children. Christianity has lost its power to inspire good behavior. Islam is the answer to the rot that pervades the American way of life. Electing an Islam-friendly Democratic majority is the most humane way to end America's decline."

The letter ended with an invitation for "Americans who have an open mind toward Iran to make a short visit to our country to see for themselves that their real enemy is Trump and his Republican henchmen. Almost everything Americans are told about Iran—that it's a dictatorship, that the government is massacring its own people, that Iran is scientifically backward and economically bankrupt, that the people have given up on their government, etc.—is a lie. We don't have 'no kings' protests here. Every good Iranian supports our government. The same sort of paradise awaits every American who converts to Islam. We guarantee it."

In related news, it appears that the Trump Administration's "Operation Economic Outcast" may be working. Oil exports from the Persian gulf region are almost back to where they were before the US-Iran war began. Iranian exports of oil have diminished to close to zero. Domestic opposition to the regime has taken up arms against the IRGC. The American media that just a few weeks ago were declaring Iran the victor in the war are now noticing that "Iran's choke hold on the Strait of Hormuz has broken down, its currency has hit a record low, and the war has eroded the country's economic stability."


TOPICS: Government; Military/Veterans; Politics
KEYWORDS: islam; oil; satire; trump

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1 posted on 10/05/2026 10:14:51 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Along with the press...lol


2 posted on 10/05/2026 10:16:23 AM PDT by Sacajaweau
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To: John Semmens

....or else..............


3 posted on 10/05/2026 10:16:40 AM PDT by Red Badger (Iryna Zarutska, May 22, 2002 Kyiv, Ukraine – August 22, 2025 Charlotte, North Carolina Say her name)
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To: John Semmens

The Red-Green Alliance. The Greens fully intend to slaughter the Reds after they are no longer useful.


4 posted on 10/05/2026 10:17:24 AM PDT by MtnClimber (For photos of scenery, wildlife and climbing, click on my screen name for my FR home page.)
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To: John Semmens

“By electing Democrats who will oust Trump from office the people of America will prove themselves worthy of membership in our faith and will not be killed after an Islamic regime supplants the evil, deceitful, and violent politicians who are responsible for America’s current state.””

.

“will not be killed after an Islamic regime supplants ~ politicians”

Sounds like the usual death threats to me.

.


5 posted on 10/05/2026 10:19:40 AM PDT by TLI (ITINERIS IMPENDEO VALHALLA)
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To: TLI

who in their right mind would want membership in your faith?


6 posted on 10/05/2026 10:23:10 AM PDT by redcatcherb412
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To: John Semmens

Heh, you see John Semmens, I used to read your satire daily, often without realizing it was satire, and the way you write it is sometimes subtle enough that it doesn’t initially come across as satire, and my blood pressure would spike!

Now, if you added something about Democrats eating babies, it would be immediately recognizable as satire, and...oh, wait. I don’t think that is outlandish enough, now that I think of it...


7 posted on 10/05/2026 10:35:18 AM PDT by rlmorel (Gas prices are Temporary. Communism is Forever. Vote Republican.)
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To: John Semmens

“Death to America - Vote Democrat!”

Democrats, or specifically the Democrat Socialists, are not real Americans anyway.


8 posted on 10/05/2026 10:51:38 AM PDT by alloysteel (Strength to make change happen, humility to accept reality, and wisdom to know the difference.)
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To: John Semmens

9 posted on 10/05/2026 11:03:57 AM PDT by PROCON (Sic Semper Tyrannis)
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To: John Semmens; lightman; Navy Patriot

......The Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC) wrote a 26 page “open letter” to the American people saying “Islam requires believers to stand up to tyrants. By electing Democrats who will oust Trump from office the people of America will prove themselves worthy of membership in our faith and will not be killed after an Islamic regime supplants the evil, deceitful, and violent politicians who are responsible for America’s current state.”.......

The deceitful Iranian islamists want us to vote for “Noo” Socialists, and lie to us about what would happen should an islamist regime takes over the USA.

The real truth is that should an islamist regime the over, they will slaughter anyone who does not submit to them!

Vote the “Noo” Socialists down, and totally resist islam! islam is false and weak, and Lord willing Iran itself will be made free and majority Christian! Amen!


10 posted on 10/05/2026 11:25:10 AM PDT by Honorary Serb (Kosovo is Serbia! Free Srpska! Abolish ICTY!)
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To: John Semmens
"Iran Urges Americans to Vote Democrat"
That about sums it up
11 posted on 10/05/2026 11:40:41 AM PDT by ProudDeplorable (Concentrated power has always been the enemy of liberty. ~ Ronald Reagan)
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