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Dennis Quaid Retires From Acting To Appear In Christian Films
Babylon Bee ^ | 12/13/2024 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 12/14/2024 11:30:25 AM PST by DFG

AUSTIN, TX — Bringing a critically acclaimed career to a close, movie star Dennis Quaid announced his retirement from acting to start appearing in Christian films.

The fan-favorite actor, who starred in such popular films as The Right Stuff, The Parent Trap, and Jaws 3, revealed that he was leaving professional acting behind and would instead spend the rest of his days starring in Christian movies.

"It's time I found something to do other than telling compelling stories with really good scripts," Quaid said. "I've enjoyed my time as a movie star, but you eventually reach a point where you've got to move on. That's why I'll be making Christian films from now on. It's a complete departure from acting."

Christian movie studios were thrilled with the news. "Yes! We've got another person who can be in our films!" said River of Life Pictures founder Bob Clifton. "A lot of time, we hear from Hollywood actors who want to branch out and appear in faith-based movies, but we have to turn them away because it's an entirely different skill set. Starring in movies is acting. This is something very different."

Hollywood sources said the film industry would miss Quaid but find a way to soldier on with other actors who were willing to remain mired in a morally questionable business.

At publishing time, every Christian movie in pre-production announced that it would now star Dennis Quaid.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; dennisquaid; satire
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1 posted on 12/14/2024 11:30:25 AM PST by DFG
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To: DFG

Looks like he does not want to work for the dark side any more.


2 posted on 12/14/2024 11:32:30 AM PST by MtnClimber (For photos of scenery, wildlife and climbing, click on my screen name for my FR home page.)
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To: MtnClimber
Looks like he does not want to work for the dark side any more.

It's the Bee!

3 posted on 12/14/2024 11:39:34 AM PST by Auntie Dem (Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Terrorist lovers gotta go!)
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To: DFG

Well, we enjoyed the Reagan Movie, and bought the Blu-Ray disc!


4 posted on 12/14/2024 11:39:43 AM PST by Navy Patriot (I Voted For President Trump, Celebrate Recivilization!)
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To: Auntie Dem
"It's the Bee!"

(That feeling of being 'set up')
5 posted on 12/14/2024 11:42:01 AM PST by clearcarbon (Fraudulent elections have consequences.)
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To: All

6 posted on 12/14/2024 11:45:16 AM PST by Liz (As West Texas ranchers occasionally say: “THAT boy had one too many years of college.”)
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To: DFG

(and would instead spend the rest of his days starring in Christian movies.)

Good

✝️🙏🛐


7 posted on 12/14/2024 11:48:20 AM PST by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Day's of Lot; They id Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: SaveFerris

Oh it got me LOL 🤣🤣🤣


8 posted on 12/14/2024 11:48:53 AM PST by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Day's of Lot; They id Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: Auntie Dem

It got me!

Because a few Hollywood actors have been in Christian films lately


9 posted on 12/14/2024 11:50:46 AM PST by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Day's of Lot; They id Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: DFG

Another Bee screwup. This is a slam at Christian films. About 10% of the Bee misses the mark.


10 posted on 12/14/2024 11:57:19 AM PST by DesertRhino (2016 Star Wars, 2020 The Empire Strikes Back, 2024... RETURN OF THE JEDI..)
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To: SaveFerris

He needs to get his brother to play cousin Eddie and Christian films. He can live in his trailer or RV.

But first I would like to see both play in a remake of Death Blow.


11 posted on 12/14/2024 12:14:40 PM PST by Larry Lucido (Donate! Don't just post clickbait!)
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To: DesertRhino
Another Bee screwup. This is a slam at Christian films. About 10% of the Bee misses the mark.

Count it as self-deprecating humor to have Christian-run Babylon Bee making fun of Christian movies (rightly so IMHO, with the cheesy writing of many Christian movies).

12 posted on 12/14/2024 12:27:31 PM PST by Tell It Right (1 Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: DesertRhino
This is a slam at Christian films.

Not completely. While it hints that the production values of Christian films may not always be the best, I found it more along the lines of a suggestion that those who act in Christian films no longer are offered parts in regular releases by the big movie companies.
13 posted on 12/14/2024 12:43:35 PM PST by Dr. Sivana ("Whatsoever he shall say to you, do ye." (John 2:5))
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To: DFG

The Bee is makin satire, but it might be true.

Dennis Quaid did do a great job in the character of the father of the principle character in the movie “I Can Only Imagine”, about the songwiter of the song I Can Only Imagine, and its about the song itself.

Quaid plays a beast of a dad to a son who becomes a singer song writer in a Christian music group. The father and son become estranged but their relationship begins to change after the son departs permanently but on a brief return learns the dad has cancer. The dad himself changes as he seeks Christ and redemption.

The story has some great lines in it, and the whole thing is based on the real life of the song writer and his eventual writing of I Can Only Imgagine.

Quaid does a a great job in it.


14 posted on 12/14/2024 12:44:39 PM PST by Wuli
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To: DesertRhino

Which they’ve earned fair and square.


15 posted on 12/14/2024 12:47:37 PM PST by Romulus ( )
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To: DesertRhino

I didn’t quite get it either.


16 posted on 12/14/2024 12:54:40 PM PST by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: MtnClimber
"Looks like he does not want to work for the dark side any more."

Dennis just hosted a History Channel series titled "Holy Marvels." He's got four new movies coming out, and a TV series called "Happy Face" in which he plays the real-life serial killer.

17 posted on 12/14/2024 1:00:40 PM PST by mass55th (“Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway.” ― John Wayne)
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To: DesertRhino

I think the unstated joke is that, in Hollywood, you have to be a convincing phony. Actors in Christian movies can be themselves.


18 posted on 12/14/2024 1:32:20 PM PST by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: BradyLS

The article stretches that point.


19 posted on 12/14/2024 2:35:21 PM PST by HIDEK6 (God bless Donald Trump)
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To: Wuli

I loved the scenen in “I Can Only Imagine” when he teaches the father to play a chord on the guitar. Quaid looks up once he got it and says “You’re in trouble now. I can play guitar.”


20 posted on 12/14/2024 2:49:38 PM PST by wbarmy (Trying to do better.)
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