Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

The Babylon Bee Presents: COVID Christmas Carols
Babylon Bee ^ | 12/13/2021 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 12/13/2021 3:30:17 PM PST by DFG

This season, it's important to focus on the true meaning of Christmas: compliance.

Christmas caroling, once a holiday tradition of family and friends spreading joy and cheer to neighbors and communities, is now illegal, and rightfully so. We are—and will forever be—in the midst of a dangerous pandemic, and nothing spreads lethal viruses more virulently than through friends, family, singing, and joy.

Dismay not! You can still find a sliver of Christmas cheer while isolated in your sanitized home, double-masked and quadruple-vaccinated, by listening to some of these COVID-19 Christmas Carols:

“I'll Be Vaxxed for Christmas” - A merry, joyful reminder that only the vaxxed are allowed to enjoy Christmas.

"It Came Upon A Mandate Clear" - Sing this beautiful carol and remember your first mandate. Precious memories...

"Baby, There's COVID Outside" - That's a billion times worse than it being cold outside!

"Silent Media" - The Wuhan Virology Lab released a virus upon the world... and the media fell reverently silent.

"Do You Fear What I Fear" - If it's not COVID, you're killing Grandma.

"What Variant is This?" - Yeah, we lost track too.

"Have Yourself A Lonely Little Christmas" - OR ELSE.

"God Rest Ye Boosted Gentlemen" - The only gentlemen who have a right to rest are the ones who are boosted.

"mRNA In a Manager" - Remember the birth of the savior: mRNA.

"Fauci Baby" - As sung by Brian Stelter.

"Carol of The Bell's Palsy" - Completely unrelated to the vaccine, Pfizer assures us.

"It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Wuhan" - Unsurprisingly, this carol is illegal in Wuhan.

“Santa Claus Is Staying at Home” - “He sees you defying lockdowns, he knows when you’re not vaxxed, he is not coming anyway, so stay home and wear a mask!”

"All I Want For Christmas Is Ivermectin" - A conservative favorite.

"Jab to the World" - Who needs "joy" when you got that jab?

"Fauci the Vaxman" - Why hasn't he melted away yet?

"Ave Moderna" - AAAAAVVVEE MO-DERRRRRR-ERRRRR-NAAAAAA

“Have an Omi-Cron-y Christmas” - The hit single of 2021 is raging through the world after its South Africa debut!

"Good King Brandon" - Let's go Brandon!

"Grandma Got COVID By A Cuomo" - An unsettlingly peppy song.

"Variant Both Meek And Mild" - As pretty much all the variants were...

“Christmas (Baby Please Stay Home)” - We highly recommend the version recorded by The National Karens Choir.

“Mary Did You Know (About the Vaccine Mandate)” - Sometimes a Christian holiday mansplainer is needed to spread the joy of mandates.

“Masked Christmas” - This Christmas pop song will have you singing along in your own muffled, sad way.

“Sanitize The Halls” - “Fa-la-la-la-la-la wash your hands!”

“O Come, O Come, Dr. Fauci” - This old classic choral number sings reverence to our Lord and Savior and director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases.

Jingle Bells, Biden Smells: Fauci laid an egg!

Now sing some carols, and have yourself a safe, socially distanced, vaxxed, masked, remote zoom call little Christmas!


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; carols; christmas; fauci; vaxxed

1 posted on 12/13/2021 3:30:17 PM PST by DFG
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: DFG

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I ❤ The Bee!


2 posted on 12/13/2021 3:31:54 PM PST by mewzilla (Those aren't masks. They're muzzles. )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG

The Bee’s the best.


3 posted on 12/13/2021 3:38:48 PM PST by Rocky (The forces of tyranny expand inexorably to fill the space made available for their existence. )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG

That’s gold Jerry gold


4 posted on 12/13/2021 3:41:44 PM PST by xp38
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG

very clever

:)


5 posted on 12/13/2021 3:43:24 PM PST by Tennessee Nana
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG
So funny.

Genius.....

6 posted on 12/13/2021 3:43:56 PM PST by Lakeshark (Trump. He stands for the great issues of the day. Stay the course!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG

“I Saw Mommy Snitching on Santa Claus” - Sorry, but a fake beard doesn’t pass as a mask.


7 posted on 12/13/2021 3:51:24 PM PST by CatOwner (Don't expect anyone, even conservatives, to have your back when the SHTF in 2021 and beyond.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG

It turns out that the songs write themselves! To wit:

Dismay not! You can still find a sliver of Christmas cheer while isolated in your sanitized home, double-masked and quadruple-vaccinated, by listening to some of these COVID-19 Christmas Carols:

“I’ll Be Vaxxed for Christmas” - A merry, joyful reminder that only the vaxxed are allowed to enjoy Christmas.

“It Came Upon A Mandate Clear” - Sing this beautiful carol and remember your first mandate. Precious memories...

“Baby, There’s COVID Outside” - That’s a billion times worse than it being cold outside!

“Silent Media” - The Wuhan Virology Lab released a virus upon the world... and the media fell reverently silent.

“Do You Fear What I Fear” - If it’s not COVID, you’re killing Grandma.

“What Variant is This?” - Yeah, we lost track too.

“Have Yourself A Lonely Little Christmas” - OR ELSE.

“God Rest Ye Boosted Gentlemen” - The only gentlemen who have a right to rest are the ones who are boosted.

“mRNA In a Manager” - Remember the birth of the savior: mRNA.

“Fauci Baby” - As sung by Brian Stelter.

“Carol of The Bell’s Palsy” - Completely unrelated to the vaccine, Pfizer assures us.

“It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Wuhan” - Unsurprisingly, this carol is illegal in Wuhan.

“Santa Claus Is Staying at Home” - “He sees you defying lockdowns, he knows when you’re not vaxxed, he is not coming anyway, so stay home and wear a mask!”

“All I Want For Christmas Is Ivermectin” - A conservative favorite.

“Jab to the World” - Who needs “joy” when you got that jab?

“Fauci the Vaxman” - Why hasn’t he melted away yet?

“Ave Moderna” - AAAAAVVVEE MO-DERRRRRR-ERRRRR-NAAAAAA

“Have an Omi-Cron-y Christmas” - The hit single of 2021 is raging through the world after its South Africa debut!

“Good King Brandon” - Let’s go Brandon!

“Grandma Got COVID By A Cuomo” - An unsettlingly peppy song.

“Variant Both Meek And Mild” - As pretty much all the variants were...

“Christmas (Baby Please Stay Home)” - We highly recommend the version recorded by The National Karens Choir.

“Mary Did You Know (About the Vaccine Mandate)” - Sometimes a Christian holiday mansplainer is needed to spread the joy of mandates.

“Masked Christmas” - This Christmas pop song will have you singing along in your own muffled, sad way.

“Sanitize The Halls” - “Fa-la-la-la-la-la wash your hands!”

“O Come, O Come, Dr. Fauci” - This old classic choral number sings reverence to our Lord and Savior and director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases.

Jingle Bells, Biden Smells: Fauci laid an egg!

Now sing some carols, and have yourself a safe, socially distanced, vaxxed, masked, remote zoom call little Christmas!


8 posted on 12/13/2021 4:01:11 PM PST by one guy in new jersey
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG

Yikes! I really like this list!


9 posted on 12/13/2021 4:32:30 PM PST by AFPhys ((Liberalism is what Smart looks like to Stupid people - ® - Mia of KC. Rush - 1:50-8/21/15))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG

Can I get these on a CD or is everything streamed from the cloud now?


10 posted on 12/13/2021 5:26:13 PM PST by TigersEye (Ray Epps didn't kill himself.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DFG

All Hail the Bee!


11 posted on 12/13/2021 5:30:54 PM PST by griswold3 (When chaos serves the State, the State will encourage chaos)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: TigersEye
One Christmas during the Clinton era, Rush played an ad (fake or real, I don't remember) for a collection of Politically Correct Christmas songs.

Examples:

I forget the rest.
12 posted on 12/13/2021 6:26:30 PM PST by CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC (Unity? Of course! I pledge to respect your President as much as you respected mine the past 4 years.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 10 | View Replies]

To: CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC

Rush was great! Thanks for bringing back a good memory. :)


13 posted on 12/13/2021 6:31:06 PM PST by TigersEye (Ray Epps didn't kill himself.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 12 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson