Posted on 09/16/2021 3:26:48 PM PDT by DFG
LOS ANGELES, CA—One day after Governor Newsom fended off recall and secured the continuation of his reign, swarms of Californians descended upon Los Angeles International Airport desperate to escape. As planes filled and people began getting turned away, mothers attempted to pass their babies over the fence of the tarmac, and others clung to the landing gear of the last departing planes.
Timothy Sawchuck of Pomona, who released his grip on the landing gear just before it became too late, said, “Grabbing the landing gear is what you do when you’re fleeing an authoritarian regime, right? I’m pretty sure I saw that on TV recently.” When asked why he felt such urgency to get out of California, he explained: “Newsom has been playing it cool during the recall, but now all bets are off. There’s going to be lockdowns, water rationing, power outages—all that third-world stuff California has become famous for.”
Rebecca Anderson of Encino agreed: “Fire season is coming. From what I’ve seen, Newsom spent all his time preparing for that by calling Larry Elder a white supremacist and claiming that he was running against Donald Trump. Not sure how that’s going to thin out the dead trees and brush. I have to get out of here before the rest of the state goes up in flames!”
Those lucky enough to make it out are being transported to military bases around the country to await relocation to one of the remaining states that have not been completely run into the ground.
LOL
LOL #2
The Bee just keeps nailing it.
Try finding a U-Haul trailer/truck to rent; and if you do, it’ll cost a premium over and above the rental.
It is usually only hours before a BB satire becomes reality.
Just sayin’
Two parodies for the price of one.
They’re going to have to set up an underground railroad once the barbed wire goes up. The coyotes are going to make a fortune.
Satire is satire.
Sometimes funny.
Sometimes macabre.
That’s Funny Right There!
I suspect that PODS could make a killing by running its micro-containers on railroad flatbed cars — satisfying both the urge to exit the insanity AND be environmentally friendly about it, particularly over the Sierra ranges.
Brilliantly funny!
It’s times like this I wish I were still on Fakebook so I could post this for all my California relatives.
“Try finding a U-Haul trailer/truck to rent; and if you do, it’ll cost a premium over and above the rental.”
https://babylonbee.com/news/gavin-newsom-named-u-haul-salesperson-of-the-year/
At first I thought this was satire. 😂
Yeah - funny that.
LOL...So this is why I’m hearing rumors that airports in southern Utah have been closed to arrivals from LAX.
“Hmmm...I live in south Reno, Nevada. Could smuggling in U-Haul trucks into the SF Bay Area be a cool side hustle?”
We have a system already in place. The border coyotes can just fill the truck up on the return trip.
There might be a need for dispatchers though.
The Newsom Taliban freezing flights out of LAX?
Here’s how you know that’s a fake photo: you cannot see the “HOLLYWOOD” sign from LAX.
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