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Biden Says He Can't Wait To Find Out Who He Picked For VP
babylon bee ^ | August 3rd, 2020

Posted on 08/03/2020 6:00:20 PM PDT by Mount Athos

According to sources in the Biden campaign, the presidential candidate is on pins and needles waiting to see who it is he picked to run for vice president on his ticket.

Campaign aides say it's been Biden's most anticipated event since he found out he was running for president a few weeks ago.

A reporter asked Biden if he could hint about his VP pick during a brief interlude from his stay in the basement, where he was allowed to come upstairs to get some snacks.

"Oh boy -- I hope it's a real classy broad," he said as he drank straight from the milk jug. "I bet I picked somebody good and smart. A chick with class and style. You know, in my day, dames were dames and guys were guys. None of this 'guys becoming dolls' and 'dolls becoming guys' stuff. We would go down to the hop and do the mashed potato. You know, there's lots of good nnnn-- nutrients and stuff in potatoes. Potato is a funny word."

"Po - ta - to."

"OK, Joe, let's go," said an aide, shoving him down into the basement. "What Joe was trying to say is that he's chosen a well-qualified candidate who will run the country -- err, I mean, help him run the country -- with excellence."


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: bidenmentia
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To: Mount Athos

This time I don’t think it’s satire.


21 posted on 08/03/2020 6:36:51 PM PDT by captain_dave
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To: Leaning Right

At least she is used to being with a honky.


22 posted on 08/03/2020 6:38:32 PM PDT by shelterguy
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To: Mount Athos

Biden forgot he was running for President. He also forgot what day it is, and where he is now.


23 posted on 08/03/2020 6:43:29 PM PDT by FreedBird
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To: Mount Athos

He should pick Assata Shakur.


24 posted on 08/03/2020 6:44:26 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: shelterguy; Leaning Right

Indeed. Lenny Kravitz’ mom.


25 posted on 08/03/2020 6:53:17 PM PDT by irishjuggler
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To: Leaning Right

Too bad the actress died 25 years ago.


26 posted on 08/03/2020 7:00:22 PM PDT by Disambiguator
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To: Sacajaweau

It’s great! They have such rich Biden material to work with.


27 posted on 08/03/2020 7:00:55 PM PDT by pigsmith (Liberals can't make the connection between their politics and the decline of everything around them.)
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To: Mount Athos

Expect calls to replace Biden to start gearing up... The press knows he’s a loser and now they need a replacement. The only question is... Who? Hillary? Romney maybe? Could they do a Hillary Romney ticket maybe?

And under what rule would they replace him? I assume they could always come up with doctor’s diagnoses of dementia and have Biden step aside for the good of the Democrat party, and of course the country.


28 posted on 08/03/2020 7:01:59 PM PDT by jerod (Nazi's were essentially Socialist in Hugo Boss uniforms... Get over it!)
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To: Mount Athos

Does he mean who Soros picked?


29 posted on 08/03/2020 7:02:54 PM PDT by doorgunner69 (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading - T Jefferson)
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To: Mount Athos

If Shirley Chisholm was still alive.


30 posted on 08/03/2020 7:16:23 PM PDT by political1 (Love your neighbors)
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To: jerod

Biden does not look well. Is he slipping a bit?


31 posted on 08/03/2020 7:21:47 PM PDT by FreedBird
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To: stars & stripes forever

His decline, just from February of this year, is stunning.


32 posted on 08/03/2020 7:24:34 PM PDT by Jane Long (Praise God, from whom ALL blessings flow.)
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To: Mount Athos
Biden Selects Aunt Jemima As Running Mate

https://babylonbee.com/news/joe-biden-chooses-aunt-jemima-as-running-mate

33 posted on 08/03/2020 7:48:23 PM PDT by TChad (The MSM, having nuked its own credibility, is now bombing the rubble.)
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To: EvilCapitalist
The only problem for Joe is that his VP pick must be 35 years old. From the pictures I’ve seen of him with females, he likes them a LOT younger.

He's been in Congress for fifty years.

There must at least one black female daughter of some politico he molested back when she was maybe eight at a Congressional Oath Taking Ceremony? Not one?

34 posted on 08/03/2020 7:48:42 PM PDT by Tunehead54 (Nothing funny here ;-)
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To: Tunehead54

Oops, meant to mention that BB is a satire site but a good one. ;-)


35 posted on 08/03/2020 7:50:57 PM PDT by Tunehead54 (Nothing funny here ;-)
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To: Leaning Right

Too bad Geraldine isn’t around any more (Flip Wilson).


36 posted on 08/03/2020 7:52:54 PM PDT by Spirit of Liberty (It's morning in America again!)
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To: stars & stripes forever
Joe Biden has to be the creepiest Potus candidate in the history of our country.


37 posted on 08/03/2020 7:58:49 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (Does anyone know of any Democrat, who does the right thing for America/Americans today?)
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To: Mount Athos

Does a black transgender count as a woman of color?


       

38 posted on 08/03/2020 8:02:13 PM PDT by Songcraft
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To: TigersEye
Dan Quayle misspelled potato

Actually the teacher who gave the card to him with potato ( potatoe) on it mispelled it.

39 posted on 08/03/2020 8:10:20 PM PDT by TheCipher (To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature Congressman. - Mark Twain)
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To: stars & stripes forever
Joe Biden has to be the creepiest and most mentally ill Potus candidate in the history of our country.

Anyone supporting or voting for Joe Biden versus Donald Trump hates Americans/America and is mentally ill!

They deserve to be treated as mentally ill traitors now and for the rest of their miserable lives!

40 posted on 08/03/2020 8:13:08 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (Does anyone know of any Democrat, who does the right thing for America/Americans today?)
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