Posted on 05/26/2020 4:44:05 PM PDT by DFG
The Bible contains several accounts of Jesus dealing with lepers, but these historical narratives might not be telling us the full story, some scholars are now claiming.
"Rather than healing and cleansing the lepers, it seems Jesus actually just gave them an air high five and said, 'Stay home, save lives' before moving on so as not to get infected," said Dr. Robert Belling, Dean of Doubt Formation at Yale Divinity School. "It was the smart thing to do. It's how Jesus loved His neighbor. And may we all live by His example by not ever going back to work again."
One account comes from the newly discovered Gospel of Bob. According to this perspective on Jesus's life, the Messiah was approached by a leper and immediately jumped back. "Whoa, bro, social distancing!" Jesus said, giving the man a wide berth.
"But Rabbi, I can't earn a living for my family. I'm dying! What should I do?" the leper responded.
"Stay home, save lives. This ain't hard."
Dean of Doubt Formation <— very good!
Got me! I fell for it before I saw the byline, you rascals.
Is it really satire though?
Lol!
Next, they’ll be saying there is historic evidence He wore a mask during The Last Supper.
>>Is it really satire though?<<
No, not really.
I thought that was the Gospel of Karen
It is a powerfully relevant satirical point.
Jesus actually broke a lot of levitical law including hand washing.
It was not because he was opposed to the law.
It was because he was opposed to how the law was being interpreted.
That is the key and is also our current problem.
“And wear your masks”.
LOL! I fell for it, too. I was thrown by ‘Dean of Doubt Formation’ - but that it seemed plausible these days says something pretty sad.
the newly discovered Gospel of Bob:
“Whoa, bro, social distancing!” Jesus said, giving the man a wide berth.
Matthew 8 King James Version (KJV)
2 And, behold, there came a leper and worshipped him, saying, Lord, if thou wilt, thou canst make me clean.3 And Jesus put forth his hand, and touched him, saying, I will; be thou clean. And immediately his leprosy was cleansed,4 And Jesus saith unto him, See thou tell no man; but go thy way, shew thyself to the priest, and offer the gift that Moses commanded, for a testimony unto them
New symbol of Government Religion and Submission: Dorky, stupid looking, ineffective, anti-American face mask. Let’s all just wear beenie copters.
ROFL!!!
So far the left over the past few years has had Jesus in favor of gay marriage, abortion, gun control and now social distancing :)
Amazing how one can twist words as a means to an end
Or as the Oregon slogan goes, “Don’t accidentally kill someone!”
“Dean of Doubt Formation <— very good!”
Missed that first time through.
So clever. But really, so true.
Blessed are the social distancers, for they shall inherit the flattened curve.
As business keep treating people as Lepers, they’ll find we’ll stay home just fine.
Totally fooled me, Ya Bastas!!! You had me raising my fists, oh wait, Babylon Bee Byline, i’m an idiot........Good Job.
Thank you sooo much for not adding /SATIRE in the title.
Makes it much more fun!
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