Get that paperwork signed.
Posted on 08/02/2016 10:56:43 AM PDT by Scythian_Reborn
I've been married 25 years, I'm not going to go into the reasons but I just need to file for divorce, we have three kids, youngest is in high school. Love them more than I can say, to live in a different house than them is the most terrible thing I can imagine.
Already my heart is breaking just thinking about it but there's no saving this marriage. Have any of you been through such a thing? How did you cope with the loneliness. I am not a drinker and don't have a lot of friends.
Do any of you regret it terribly, I need to know ...
“the ex- missed an evening activity at the school, in order to go drink with his work buddies. Reinforced the decision, and my son was highly upset, told me he knew what was more important to dad. People might criticize, but hold your head high.”
“I’m sure convincing your son that his father’s world must revolve around him and succumb to his will has done wonders for his emotional well being, particularly now that his father is no longer around as the result of that belief.”
Exactly. My parents were never at any of my games and I turned out just fine. That is part of the problem with our kids—they think the world must revolve around them.
“she’s gained about 100 pounds since she married”
“That’s pretty much every woman once you leave the dating stage and move to committed relationship. They think being exclusive is a license to gain 25-30 lbs.”
Are you projecting, perhaps? I’m sure you’re such a prize. (sarc)
You are an egotistical, misogynistic jackass. I hope you don’t have any daughters to degrade & abuse.
Thanks. The reality is even better than my account. I was very devastated and yet, within a year I was on top of the world and remain there for the next two decades. I am almost reluctant to describe it sometimes as I have friends that have gone through divorce without the blessing I have received. In utter desolation I prayed to the Lord to help me, and wow, was my faith confirmed.
Not when women have literally been property to men.
There, fixed it for you.....
A husband and father's first priority is his family, not his drinking buddies or whatever else he wants or feels like indulging in.
Your response show a great deal of emotional immaturity. Marriage is not a free ride for the man. He did not get married to live as he chooses and have a live in housekeeper and baby sitter with privileges.
Time for the guy to man up and take responsibility like the man he claims to be and is supposed to be.
With the bitterness that is oozing out of your posts in your snarky replies to the women on board here?
No, you did not turn out *just fine*.
Actually, Wyoming granted it in their constitution in 1889...
Get that paperwork signed.
This is the kind of thing that Scythian needs to hear: that one can go through something like this with equanimity, despite the pain and difficulty; and that there are many possibilities for great happiness on the other side.
-JT
Actually, Wyoming granted it in their constitution in 1889...
____________________
Sure, this is wonderful. I can see how a state of possibly 5,000 women in a country of 50 million men could make a difference.
Noticing lots of women not liking that comment, mostly because it probably applies to them. BTW I am the same weight now as I was almost ten years ago.
Can you say the same for yourself?
” Once she got the ring on my finger, it was like watching Bruce Banner turn into The Hulk. “
A woman’s natural instinct is to attempt to dominate the man. It’s Biblical.
I was speaking more of generalized chivalrous treatment afforded to women generally in this nation with the right to vote given to them in 1920(144 years after the birth of this nation) so the first 200 years still fits what I said! Progressively more freedoms and rights were given to women during that time...women got more freedoms in America in that time more then women ever had anywhere and anytime in the past 6000 years! I was thinking of political rights as well...Muzzies would take that all away!
300 Spartans made a difference once...a three fold cord is not quickly undone!
So the foreign woman thing didn’t work out for you...or was it only Russian or Asian wives that are supposed to be superior?
"What?"
Once the kids are out of the house - then they seem to do better if their parents divorce.
___________________
Don’t you believe it.
I worked at a college counseling center.
We used to call it the annual Thanksgiving Day Massacre.
Freshman the youngest child, goes home for Thanksgiving.
Mom and Dad inform the freshman that they are divorcing and selling the homestead.
Kid comes back to college devastated, lost family and family home and is very displaced. Usually loses the rest of the year pulling himself together.
In my observation, most marriages that fail do so because people got married for the wrong reasons in the first place.
When I was young, and falling-in-love romantically every six months, the best advice I ever received was from a minister who told me: ‘Marry the man who feels like your best friend.’
I waited a long time to get married, because I couldn’t find that ‘best friend’. It got to where I thought I’d be an ‘old maid’. I wasn’t a wallflower, or ugly - men often told me that I was beautiful, and some even told me that beauty can frighten the best men away.
But looks can be false advertising, in women: a beautiful woman can be very serious, and not interested in fooling around; a plain woman can be very fascinating, if you give her a chance, and get beyond your need for the ‘hot’ factor.
I waited and waited, and then one day, I found my Best Friend. Twenty-three years, now, and going strong.
My brother has been through two painful divorces. He admits, now, that he was looking for the wrong thing in the first place. (Women look for the wrong thing, too.)
I think it’s wonderful when very young people fall into innocent love, get married, and have great families; but nowadays that innocence is thwarted by the culture. Too many people marry before they even know who they are, and their choices are based on nutty notions ingrained by popular culture before they’re old enough to realize they’ve been brainwashed.
Take your time - think of the thousands of redundant leaves on any tree: God didn’t make this a paltry world, He made it overabundant with possibility, and you don’t have to rush into anything, you don’t have to feel that there’s only ‘so much time.’ There’s all the time in the world. Take time to find your Best Friend.
And Parents: raise your kids to respect and EXpect *character* in a mate. If you instill character in your child, they will want that in their complement; and there will be far fewer sad divorce stories.
-JT
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.