Posted on 07/18/2016 6:54:26 PM PDT by WhoisAlanGreenspan?
Looking for some comments and any advice.
I lost my only son to this horrible addiction to heroin just a few months ago. 4/2/16 Now I've been contacted by a nephew (in-law) who shares the same problems.
I want to help him if I can.
The thought I had was in addition to gathering his papers from another location, driving him with those papers to the Secretary of State office and paying for the new ID, that he needs to get a (for sure) new job. I would also give him a five dollar bill. And tell him he is to hold that same bill if he ever wants me to help him again.
The thinking is that an addict spends everything he has on getting high, but if he can maintain some self control by saving the five bucks in his pocket I loaned him, I'll talk with him and continue trying to help.
Im sorry for your lose, i know the pain of it very well.
Best thing you can do for someone suffering from opiate addiction is to get them into treatment. If he’s still getting high, that 5 bucks is getting spent.
You need to understand once they are addicted, it no longer has anything to do with will power or discipline. I’ve read about Navy Seals getting madly addicted to this stuff, it has nothing to do with mental fortitude, because his mind is controlled by the chemicals. He can no longer think his way out of it, because the mind is damaged.
If he’s really addicted, get him to detox and then into rehab for 30 days. If it’s just a 5 day detox, there’s a 90% of relapse.
Also, the Suboxone program is another good option. Some may look down on this method as still using a medication and not being clean, but I’ve seen it saves lives and turn people around.
I wish you the best, I would not wish addiction on my worst enemy...well, maybe Hillary Clinton ;)
Recovery brother, I love you.
Thanks. That does put a somewhat different perspective on it. But it could have been very, very dangerous both you and he were fortunate that nothing worse happened. I still think it was torturous for him but I was harsh in writing you had tortured him as if that was your goal. My apology.
I’m so sorry you lost your son.
I can safely say that there is no one "magic formula" that will fix this problem, including "tough love". No matter how well-meaning everyone's comments are, each situation is different, and the process for one person will be different for another.
Nowadays, there is a drug called buprenorphine (Brand names "Suboxone" and "Subutex") which is used to treat opiate addiction. Needless to say, it's become a big industry. But for those who are willing to stay committed, it can be effective. Suboxone contains a small dose of Narcan (naloxone) to prevent IV abuse. An addict who injects it will not get the desired effect. Subutex is simply buprenorphine without the Narcan mixed in, and is therefore subject to IV abuse.
The option mentioned above is the modern day replacement for Methadone maintenance.
Forcing someone to go through "cold turkey" heroin withdrawal can be dangerous in and of itself. For those who are not in the flower of youth (say, over 30), it can be much more than simply uncomfortable. As with alcohol, severe withdrawal symptoms in older addicts can cause deadly trauma to the human body. That's why I mention the medication above.
So what I'm saying is take all the advice to heart, but don't for a moment presume you have to subject this person to excessive physical or emotional trauma, because that can cause unintended consequences that can spiral out of control in and of themselves. I've seen it.
Aggregate all the info you receive, and then follow your own (and the Lord's) guidance in dealing with this problem.
Setting aside the "tough love" dogma for a moment, consider trying to get this person into a Subox clinic. The cost is not excessive. I know of at least a couple of instances in my circle of family and friends where such treatment has been very effective, and it can be done on an outpatient basis. After all, not everyone is wealthy enough to go to afford a "rehab" resort.
It is true that an addict can only undertake these steps when they are truly ready to, and it's also true that many addicts indeed can't get to that point until they do hit rock bottom. But to believe that someone can't be helped right where they happen to be at the moment is rather nonsensical. Some people can and do receive effective help before hitting "rock bottom".
God bless,
Sargon
As insensitive as it sounds, nobody put a gun to his head and told him to start using. He made the choice. The consequences are his and his alone. If he is to climb out of the hole, he has to do it on his own merit. Otherwise, he won't learn the terrible cost of making that decision. Sorry, but that's how the real world works.
I say that as a father of a daughter who used. It was a very painful lesson for my wife and me. But she now says that our refusal to rescue her helped her to turn herself around.
She's doing great now, and is a wonderful mother to our granddaughter.
Pennsylvania is have its heroin crisis, the Dept., of Corrections is releasing the so-called non-violent drug dealers back into the neighborhoods because the Sed. of Corrections thinks that they can be productive! Well they are, getting more people hooked on the drugs!
One cannot put anyone anywhere. There are no such things as sanitariums for addicts.
There are programs but they are voluntary.
“There is no hardwiring. It is all software. It is just erroneous programming.”
I LOVE this. Absolutely true, perfectly stated.
Laz is being gentler with you than I want to be.
Unless you have been there you have zero knowledge of what happens to a person who would give anything to do different but cannot. It is not a matter of choice. The alcoholic processes the drink differently than a normal drinker. They are bodily and mentally different from other people.
One can pontificate all they want, it doesn’t change the science.
Blowing off other people’s life experience as an opinion is an example of contempt prior to investigation.
Would you stop if your only child,only eight years old, was suicidal? Would you stop f your marriage was falling apart? Would you stop if every morning you woke up you cursed whatever God there maybe because you were still a live? I was at the darkest point of my life when grace gave me a chance. I had to do the work. I am glad I did and do
Hey Laz....you are an inspiration to folks like me
An addict at my church once said to me
“I quit lecturing people about addiction long ago because I figured out that we are very good at hiding it. “
IOW don’t say “You don’t know...” to someone because....they might know. They just might not want YOU to know they know.
One of my friends is a bad alcoholic (i.e. he does stupid stuff when he drinks). He quit booze and took up running. When someone asked if he was clean, he said “I’m just addicted to different stuff now”.
Your definition of an alcoholic is odd at best
I was not lecturing anyone. I was responding to a post.
The addictive personality can get addicted to sex, shopping, reading, running, religion, whatever. It is only by working the Steps that we begin to chip away at our addictive nature.
I'm a work in progress. I got addicted to guns recently, but unfortunately, boating accident yadda yadda yadda. :)
I thought I was gentle.....
I frequently say that I never did one of anything in my whole life
you probably tried this, but have you tried checking him into rehab?
Hi, I was a practicing alcoholic for 56 years.
Ummmmm....ok
True
Prison is often a favor
What you said.
I put 2 family members through rehab. One for heroin, one for meth.
One rehab “took”. That person is now a successful member of society.
The other rehab did not take. That person is a failure and a loser in life, and steals from family to this day.
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