Posted on 07/07/2009 12:41:27 PM PDT by marthemaria
I am struggling with a very selfish grief. I am loosing it really. Everybody seems to be going on. But I am still in the middle of my grief. It is just a month ago. But I miss my mother so much. I know she would want me to be happy . But I am not there yet. I am in this selfish grief of why why why. I cant accept it. I miss her so much. I am sitting on her grave every day. I am crying and I am grieving. I talk to her. I look at her picture and listen to her voice on my cellphone.
When can I accept it and let her go. Right now I am clinging to her. I am at her grave all the time. I look at her pictures. I listen to her voice on my cellphone, I look at pictures of here. I just miss her so much
And I should not judge those who grieve for mr jackson. but it still feels absurd.
I would be fully lost without my mom.
Bless your heart. I am sending prayers your way. I know it must be tough. I know other FReepers will be better with words than me. Sorry I’m kind of short-winded.
I am so sorry. No words.
I pray that God gives you comfort. He is the only one that can in this situation.
It is right and proper that you grieve for your mother, who passedaway just a month ago. It takes a long, long time toassuage the grief of losing the most important person in your life.
I lost my mother 25 years ago, and I still long for her every day.
Having lost my Mom at age 24 and my Dad fairly recently..
There is no right way to grieve, there is no wrong way to grieve...
Honor your feelings and pray a lot.
You hurt because you loved deeply.
Trust that one day that every tear will be wiped away.
Your mom left a very special gift on this Earth. She left her heart and soul with that gift. Take care of that gift for your mom. That gift is you.
I’d say the thing you need to figure out how to do is to move on without giving up your connection with her. Maintain the emotions you now feel (missing her, loving her, grieving for her) without letting it dictate your actions. Life must go one. I’m sure that what she’d expect from you...
Grieving is difficult. However, if you have children, you must not neglect them in your grief. They need you.
Think of your mother often. Try to act as she would. Handle the situation as she would. Talk to her anytime (you can now).
And rest assured that she is the one now enjoying paradise, and you will surely see her again.
Time will separate you from the minute by minute grief flow...changing it to hourly, daily, weekly and even monthly. Softening the memory until when it smacks you, it makes you smile.
You, too, are going to die. And no doubt be with her, and what stories you will have to tell...
Cry and grieve, there is a reason for it. Soon enough, you will find yourself letting go.
I understand it takes a while. I lost my mother when I was in my 20s and I still miss her.
The pain will lessen in time and you will be able to go on. This is actually quite normal, as difficult as it is. In the meantime, you have our prayers.
Prayers for your loss.
/johnny
My prayers are with you. Keep in mind that your mother would no doubt urge you not to let your grief become disabling or otherwise divert your from your tasks in life.
Prayers for your mom, for the repose of her soul in the loving arms of Almighty God. And prayers for you, for consolation in your sad loss.
It’s alright, take as long as you wish to be sad. Your mom will understand, God will understand. You just have to remember to soldier on. Be good to yourself and don’t blame yourself for being sad.
Someday you will think of your mom and be happy again. It just takes time.
Like when I whipped out my phone to call dad for a technical question about pouring concrete... only to realize that he's been gone these 8 years.
/johnny
Remember that each moment.
I lost my mom in 1979 to breast cancer when she was 52 years old. I miss her daily, but I'm reminded that she would not want me to grieve.
Please let your mom rest....not by forgetting, but by letting go. It takes love to let go. Show her that you do.
Prayers for strength and comfort.
(((marthemaria)))
I know. I thank god for giving me such a loving mother. I have so many good memories.
But I am still selfish. I want more. I want her kind hugs and comfort. I cant let go yet. Even though I have to.
It’s ok to still be grieving, and grieving hard. You’ll wake up one morning and you will feel better. You’re fortunate to love someone so much.
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