The Ultimate Vanity Thread

My brain | 11/22/02 | FTH

[FreeTheHostages]

This vanity thread exists to accept edits from interested persons in anticipation of a December Freeper's Finest discussion of the Free Republic phenomenon commonly known as "Mudboy Slim."

[FreeTheHostages]

I can't EVEN BEGIN to discuss what's wrong with THAT idea because I have no idea what you're saying. :)

[ru4liberty]

Whuppin' Lib'rals is a favorite pasttime of mine...MUD

Incited, no doubt, by Rush Limbaugh. ;-)

[FreeTheHostages]

Build it and they will come.

[Aquamarine]

You have mail.

[Balata]

Here's my nomination for Mudboy Slim's biography lyrics. It's my favorite.

"Vile Forces"
(To be sung to the Rolling Stones' "Wild Horses")

Bill thinks this Country is easy to fool,
Abusing his power, obstructing the truth!
Shameless traitor, Presidency's a sham,
You know we can't let this High Treason stand!
Vile forces hold Bill's critics at bay,
But wild, wild horses couldn't drive me away!

America's sufferin' a dull, achin' pain,
Networks can't hide it, their power has waned.
No explanation, no compromise...
Will make us feel better until Slick resigns.
Vile forces try to lead us astray...
Lib'ral "choices" drain our freedoms away!

It must concern you, Bill's sins and his lies,
But now Slick's beholden to his Communist spies.
Our faith's been broken, Bill must be tried,
He'll rot in prison to pay for his crimes!
Vile forces try to excuse it away,
Democrat voices remain silent today.

Vile forces mustn't lead us astray...
Righteous forces, they'll triumph someday!!

Muchas Gracias...MUD

[FreeTheHostages]

Thanks!!

[Balata]

I think it's a common thread that binds all FReepers.:-)

[FreeTheHostages]

"I think it's a common thread that binds all FReepers.:-)"

I think this is a good point that should make into the Bio. And then we'd just say "Mudboy Slim just does it more vigorously and exuberantly than most!"

I live near a Starbucks. Methinks I want a gingerbread latte. You all take good care of the thread and make sure it's nice and spruced up and manicured for Mudboy when he comes home from music-ing and drinkin' tonight and starts smashing all our faces in! :)

[Balata]

Sure, stir the pot then run and leave it to us to take it on the chin. Mudboy Slim will find you. #;^)

[tgslTakoma]

I know this isn't the usual type of thread that I ping the troops to, but since Mudboy Slim is a beloved member of the DC Chapter I thought that you all might like to add fact (or fancy) to the story/history of Mud.

Remember, since this thread is authored, monitored and maintained by our dear pal FreeTheHostages, creativity counts!

[tgslTakoma]

I've been told (OK, Mud's the one that told me this, so it may be embellished a bit) that for some time during the seventies he was involved in the Roller Derby, a career in which he earned the fortune that now allows him to write the radical songs he is now famous for.

I did a little searching on the 'net and found a couple of photos of Mudboy Slim in his Roller Derby days...

Mudboy in his early days, (notice the baby fat) wore the #36 jersey of the Richmond Renegades. Shortly after this photo was taken, Mud went on a diet and was soon traded to...

...the Petersburg Patriots, where he became a star member of the team, and it is with the Patriots that Mud made his vast fortune; which allowed him the small indulgence of buying the house of his dreams...

...which he shares with his better half, Mrs. Mud and all the little Mudrats.

That's all I have to offer of Mudboy's history for now. More to come when I can make it up...

:-)

[Gore_ War_ Vet]

Wasn't he the one, who when we were on the White House tour asked the guide if he could go to the bathroom.

If I recall when the guide told him "Of course" ol Mud just stood there awhile and mumbled 'thank you'.

[FreeTheHostages]

WOW!!! The roller derby stuff is *very* helpful. And the photograph of the MudCave is extremely useful. (If only to help all the CPAC attendees find their way to his house, where he's graciously agreed to host a big CPAC party!)

[FreeTheHostages]

I refer you to post 71. Our biography of Mudboy is shaping up nicely!! (And don't worry, Mudboy takes jokes very well, it will all be in food fun.) I do think my final write-up is probably going to have to include a link to this thread so everyone can see the solid journalistic/investigative techniques we employed.

So everything's going nicely, I insist. Then why am I nervous about what will happen when Mudboy next logs on? ;)

[FreeTheHostages]

I have independently verified that your photo does in fact reveal the MudCave through a Bob Woodward journalistic technique of telepathy. I was able, by concentrating and focussing, to read Condi's mind as she watched television alone and discern from her thoughts the MudCave's location.

I think it's very important for all my information to be cross-checked so we can be as accurate as the New York Times.

[FreeTheHostages]

"LOL! You have a head start on Mudboy Slim, but I don't think it's enough. Since I'm doing this from a distance, ping if you need some close air support.#;^)
Here's to responsible journalism! "

Hmmm, I'm getting the most curious Freepmails!

[FreeTheHostages]

FINAL DRAFT OF SEGMENT ONE: THE INTRO
An Introduction to Mudboy Slim:
Or, How the Libertarian Lyricist Acquired His Label

Here on Free Republic, there is a fine line between Republicans posting drunk and Libertarians posting sober. I realized this for real when I discovered Mudboy Slim's posts. Was he joking? Would it be less scarey and interesting if he wasn't joking? These are questions that many who encounter his posts are prone to ask.

He's been gracing our Freeper's Finest thread for a while now, so it's time for a proper introduction to Mudboy Slim. Indeed, it's time for an unauthorized biography -- I believe a new genre for this thread. But hey, you asked for volunteer guest hosts and I guess you can't be picky. So, with apologies to Bob Woodward, here is my highly accurate, highly telepathic account of Mudboy Slim. What's the real story behind those brilliant reworked song lyrics you see him post? What about the exuberance and the practical jokes that make one nostalgic for Junior High School? And is it really true that he'll be hosting a big party at his house with free drinks during the CPAC conference?

C'mon, join in! If you're owed money by Mud (and who here isn't?) or just in the mood for some holiday roast Mud, pile on! Read this highly accurate account of Mudboy Slim and add your own poignant memories of Mudboy Slim's youth and adult political adventures to this lore. Then without further adoo, let us begin, on the What, Where, How, When, and especially WHY of Mudboy Slim.

Ok, that's my final draft of the intro. Any comments?

[Teacup]

Did that really happen? That is too funny. Way to go Mudboy.

[Teacup]

Let me tell you about how they came to call me "Septic Tank Bill..."

BAWAWAHAHA! Stop! You're killing me! (tears rolling down my face.)

[FreeTheHostages]

FINAL DRAFT OF SEGMENT TWO:
Mudboy Slim's Adolescence: The Roller Derby Years and
A Very Dirty Neigborhood Prank

According to a highly placed source (OK, someone who posted here), for some time in the 1970s, Mudboy was involved in the Roller Derby. (Our source adds that "Mud's the one that told me this, so it may be embellished a bit.") He was wildly successful. His roller derby career earned the fortune that now allows him to write rework the lyrics of popular songs to reflect his conservative/libertarian views in contravention of this nation's copywright laws.

Mudboy in his early days, (notice the baby fat) wore the #36 jersey of the Richmond Renegades. (in final, do: img src="http://home.globaleyes.net/cbuck/midi/boydblock.jpg")
Shortly after this photo was taken, Mud went on a diet and was soon traded to... (in final, do: img src="http://www.multiboard.com/~rdpa/PHOTOS/SKATERS/63.jpg") ...the Petersburg Patriots, where he became a star member of the team, and it is with the Patriots that Mud made his vast fortune; which allowed him the small indulgence of buying the house of his dreams... (in final, do img src="http://spec.lib.vt.edu/imagebase/norfolksouthern/F1/NS4278.JPG") He shares this manse in the line that time forgot, Richmond Virginia, with his better half, Mrs. Mud and all the little Mudrats.

But apparently the fortune did not last . . . . Several Freepers, including ChadGore, Chad Fairbanks, Landru, and dubyagee, claim that Mudboy Slim owes them $ or at least an Ann Coulter book. Something about being denied a prize in a contest, which gives you a fair idea of the amount of trouble this guy can cause here. Actually, no it doesn't, he can cause MUCH more, but that will be the subject of our Part III below.

But what about the name? Ah, yes the name. Well, as our intro photograph suggests, Mudboy Slim got his name due to his daring-do in a little known field in Virginia called "the mudpits." There, many of his neighbors and friends decided to play a practical joke by claiming that they liked to belly-flop in mud. They all got themselves Muddy, and then invited Mudboy along, and Mudboy took the bait. The rest is history. Mudboy realized that in fact he really enjoyed this activity. To this day, after a 'specially heated discussion with a liberal progressive, Muddy (as he is known to his many fans on Free Republic) likes to just go SPLAT!

Lurking behind the surname "Slim" is an even dirtier tale. I was in a dingy Mississippi Delta bar last year and I overheard this old black bluesman whispering about a "Howlin' Harp" northerner who got his moniker of "Slim" by selling his "vote" to a DemocRAT named "Slick" in some Arkansas blues joint return for incomparable musical ability. Slick gave Mudboy the name "Slim."