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NEW BUMPER STICKERS

Posted on 08/28/2002 6:19:27 PM PDT by drunknsage

Bumper Stickers

1. Jesus loves you. . . everyone else thinks you're an a$$hole. 2. Impotence: Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings" 3. The proctologist called, they found your head. 4. Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film. 5. Save Your Breath. . . You'll need it to blow up your date! 6. Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them. 7. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. 8. WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship. 9. Hang up and drive. 10. If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you! 11. Heart Attacks. . . God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends 12. Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted. 13. Try not to let your mind wander. It is too small to be out by itself. 14. Some people just don't know how to drive. I call these people "Everybody But Me. " 15. Don't like my driving? Then quit watching me. 16. Guys, just because you have one, doesn't mean you have to be one. 17. Welcome to America. . . Now speak English


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS:
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I just saw this one yesterday!:

SURE YOU CAN HAVE MY GUN
bullets first.

101 posted on 08/29/2002 3:26:44 PM PDT by HighWheeler
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To: HighWheeler
"GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE, THEY JUST MAKE BULLETS GO REALLY FAST"
102 posted on 08/29/2002 3:30:12 PM PDT by misanthrope
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I My Wife.

I My Cat

(I'm not married, can you tell?)

103 posted on 08/29/2002 3:31:12 PM PDT by HighWheeler
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To: drunknsage
One of my favorites is, "Lottery, A Tax On People Who Are Bad At Math"

I have the above sticker, but it's not on my car.

104 posted on 08/29/2002 3:45:14 PM PDT by Darnright
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To: AppyPappy
Nope...that's the way I wrote 'em....
105 posted on 08/29/2002 4:19:53 PM PDT by crusher999
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To: Travis McGee
Re:"VISUALIZE WORLD POLICE"

I prefer "VISUALIZE WHIRLED PEASE"

106 posted on 08/29/2002 4:24:48 PM PDT by ChadGore
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To: drunknsage
DEMOCRATS 'R' ASSHOLES
107 posted on 08/29/2002 4:26:30 PM PDT by wattsmag2
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To: Squantos
LOL!!
108 posted on 08/29/2002 5:39:23 PM PDT by wardaddy
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To: drunknsage
one of my all-time favorites:

It takes a Viking to raze a village!
109 posted on 08/29/2002 6:31:59 PM PDT by lump in the melting pot
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To: lump in the melting pot
"My Kid Just Beat Up Your Honor Student"
110 posted on 08/29/2002 6:46:13 PM PDT by ninenot
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To: drunknsage
This one from the 80s has always been one of my favorites:

"Formula to Prevent AIDS--Sit on your a$$ and keep your mouth shut"

Two other favorites are "If you don't believe in God, you'd better be right" and "I still miss my ex-husband but my aim is getting better"

111 posted on 08/29/2002 6:52:56 PM PDT by DaBroasta
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To: FreeTally
Nice link; thanks!


112 posted on 08/29/2002 7:45:42 PM PDT by BraveMan
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To: FreeTally
Honk if you have never seen an Uzi fired from a moving vehicle!

CLASSIC!!!

113 posted on 08/29/2002 7:52:23 PM PDT by Travis McGee
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To: misanthrope; wardaddy; Squantos; Poohbah; harpseal; Lazamataz
"GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE, THEY JUST MAKE BULLETS GO REALLY FAST"

I love that one too!

114 posted on 08/29/2002 7:53:38 PM PDT by Travis McGee
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To: Cap'n Crunch
There's a couple of great ones on this thread!

How about a "practical joke" where you slap them on the bottom of your buddies bumper?

115 posted on 08/29/2002 7:56:45 PM PDT by Travis McGee
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To: drunknsage
If you like Hanson, honk 3 times and run into a tree

Money talks, but mine only says goodbye

I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable

(From Florida) When I retire I'm gonna move up North and drive real slow

DRIVE IT LIKE YOU STOLE IT

(On a clunker) Honk If Anything Falls Off

My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips

Next mood swing: 6 minutes

A day without sunshine is, like, night

My mind is like a steel trap: rusty and illegal in 37 states

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke

If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?

116 posted on 08/29/2002 7:59:50 PM PDT by petuniasevan
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To: Travis McGee
My old Land Rover has a Ruger spare tire covering, a Marsha Blackburn for US Congress (conservative mom here in middle TN) sticker, a VMI decal,an NRA seal, a Black Powder decal, a "No State Income Tax in TN" sticker, and a Bonnie Blue front tag. My wife thinks I'm a bit redneck with all that so she won't let anything on her new Green Suburban K1500 but I snuck an HK emblem trailer hitch cover on and she hasn't complained....yet.

I always liked "Cat....the other white meat"....and I own two cats.

I did have a "Gore Free TN" sticker in 2000 but in the spirit of civility...I took it off spring of 2001. Some folks are still sporting those around here.

I'd buy a pro-life tag if TN sold them like FL does.

117 posted on 08/29/2002 9:36:58 PM PDT by wardaddy
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To: ErnBatavia
:o) ......... Stay Safe Ern !!
118 posted on 08/29/2002 10:06:41 PM PDT by Squantos
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To: NordP
REPUBLICAN WOMEN MAKE GREAT LEADERS
You're Following One Now

You GO girl! I like that one!

119 posted on 08/29/2002 10:08:07 PM PDT by SuziQ
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To: DaBroasta
"I still miss my ex-husband but my aim is getting better"

Now THAT'S funny!!!

Our #2 son has a T-shirt that reads "Your village called, their idiot is missing". That would make a good bumper sticker!

120 posted on 08/29/2002 10:18:45 PM PDT by SuziQ
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