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Progressive Researchers Claim They Are 15-20 Years From Finding Out What A Woman Is
babylonbee.com ^ | 1/15/26 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 01/16/2026 10:52:31 AM PST by GrandJediMasterYoda

Progressive Researchers Claim They Are 15-20 Years From Finding Out What A Woman Is

U.S. โ€” Progressive researchers working with the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU ) said they were only a mere 15-20 years away from finding out what a woman is.

"We're very close," said Dr. Nina Rangleford, a medical doctor and biology expert. "We've studied hundreds of human bodies and cross-referenced those findings with what people feel. We're confident we'll be able to provide an accurate definition of what a woman is in just 15 years. Twenty, max."

Researchers said they have left no stone unturned in their experiments, even deigning to look up the definition of woman in a dictionary.

"Well, this is obviously wrong," one researcher said after examining a Webster's Dictionary. "We've got our work cut out for us, boys. I mean girls. I mean... whatever."

In an effort to maintain professional neutrality, the ACLU made sure to recruit one scientist from each and every one of the 437 known genders. The team was then sequestered to avoid recent political discussion on the matter so they could focus on what really matters: their feelings.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; bee; canmengetpregnant; satire; whatisawoman
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

“More grant funding needed!!!”


21 posted on 01/16/2026 11:50:38 AM PST by misterdarcey (Abandon all nuance, ye who enter here.)
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To: TnTnTn
Look at this, this is real. I just asked Chatgpt Ai what a woman is, and look at the first answer it gave back: "A human who identifies and lives as a female" So in other words THAT definition is more important than the biological definition? WHAT?


22 posted on 01/16/2026 11:52:38 AM PST by GrandJediMasterYoda (As long as Hillary Clinton remains free, the USA will never have equal justice under the law)
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To: al baby

Ha! I saw that episode last month, I love that show. “Alicia!!”


23 posted on 01/16/2026 11:53:34 AM PST by GrandJediMasterYoda (As long as Hillary Clinton remains free, the USA will never have equal justice under the law)
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To: drwoof

I saw that episode last month, that show is brilliant. They filmed so many episodes in the California desert. I like the one with Cliff Robertson who plays the settler going cross country with his family in the 1800s and somehow he ends up in the future and walks into a diner LOL!


24 posted on 01/16/2026 11:57:34 AM PST by GrandJediMasterYoda (As long as Hillary Clinton remains free, the USA will never have equal justice under the law)
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

This feels like a punchline we used to say as kids for the nerds that couldn’t get girlfriends.


25 posted on 01/16/2026 11:59:48 AM PST by Marko413
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

If it wasn’t for the progressives hand lotion and sex toys wouldn’t be selling as well.


26 posted on 01/16/2026 12:05:32 PM PST by Vaduz (?.)
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

We’ll probably have fusion energy before they find out.


27 posted on 01/16/2026 12:20:06 PM PST by budj (Combat Vet, second of three generations.)
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

Unfortunately this is not actually satire


28 posted on 01/16/2026 1:22:28 PM PST by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: Lazamataz

Take my money!

Take it! ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜œ

Seems like there was a thread ๐Ÿงต๐Ÿงต๐Ÿงต...๐Ÿ˜œ


29 posted on 01/16/2026 1:28:55 PM PST by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: Bob434

I zink your Z Key z Brozen bzdly.


30 posted on 01/16/2026 4:15:20 PM PST by Lazamataz (The quickest and easiest way to untold riches is to be elected to national office.)
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To: Lazamataz

my thumb is on strike- it’s been gettin lazy lately anyways


31 posted on 01/16/2026 5:23:51 PM PST by Bob434 (NYWAYS)
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To: Lazamataz

sheesh- just reread the post- that was a purty bad post of mine


32 posted on 01/16/2026 5:24:51 PM PST by Bob434 (NYWAYS)
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