Posted on 10/01/2024 5:04:44 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum
Christians, it's time for us to throw our full support behind Kamala Harris for president.
Here are the best reasons to vote for Kamala:
She can't talk very good, just like Moses: She has clearly been chosen by God.
David French is voting for her: As David French goes, so goes all of Christendom.
You can get sent to maximum security prison for protesting an abortion clinic — a great witnessing opportunity: Think of all the good you can do.
Speaking of abortion, murdered babies go straight to Heaven: Don't you want babies in Heaven?
The church has always grown under persecution: We need persecution now more than ever.
God will be impressed by your superior righteousness: If Jesus were here, he would support Kamala to make the Republican party turn on Trump and go back to much better people like Dick Cheney, even if that requires killing thousands of children and letting the world become engulfed in war. It's in the Bible.
She is totally brat: We're not sure what this means, but it's a word the hip kids are saying and we Christians should strive to remain culturally relevant.
She will usher in the end times so that we can meet Jesus sooner: Nice!
Trump is literally Satan: And Hitler and Stalin and Judas.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
😂
The BEE has it’s moments, but this is not one of them. Don’t find this funny at all.
LOL!
Will they cry? If yes, no.
And she loves yellow school busses. Only a Philistine or a scientologist could hate yellow school busses.
Lol
Generally, the Bee is pretty close.
“murdered babies go straight to Heaven”
That is not exactly an agreed point in Catholic theology. While the post-Vatican II crowd has expressed that this can be hoped for, the more traditional view is that they end up in Limbo. Preventing baptisms may, from this perspective, explain the satanic obsession with promoting abortion.
Nor do I.
I’m sorry, but this just hits too close to home.
10. Jesus said the meek shall inherit the earth. Most people don’t know what “meek” means, so it goes well with Kamala’s word salad.
Maybe the B is making fun of all the “Christians” who say they are voting for Commiela.
Probably a fake group of propagandists hired by the evil Marxist Democrats.
😊
Meek people? Probably means poor. And commiela will make everyone except her and her cronies poor.
Meekness is actually power or influence held in check.
It’s a joke.
My bad. lol
When I saw the title, I thought this would be an article written by one of those goofball “Christians” who couldn’t possibly vote for Trump.
Thank God it’s the Bee!
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