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Trump Indicted For Murdering Elderly Man On CNN
The Babylon Bee ^ | June 27, 2024

Posted on 06/28/2024 6:33:30 AM PDT by Ciaphas Cain

ATLANTA — Tonight's presidential debate ended abruptly when Donald Trump was served with papers notifying him that he had been indicted for the murder of an elderly man on CNN.

"Hey, I didn't do anything!" Trump told authorities. "He was like that when I got here!"

Trump, who had planned to debate President Joe Biden, argued that the strange old man keeled over all on his own.

"The very idea..." the old man said before slumping over onto a nearby podium. It was also at this point that Trump discovered the man had been propped up by an apparatus and could not stand on his own.

"You know, I got here and everything was fine. CNN is fake news, but I'm here and they've been nice tonight," Trump said. "But then there was this dead old man in the corner. And I thought, wow, the game must be afoot, you know? And believe me, I was about to solve this murder before you got here."

"Yeah, yeah," said Officer Nolan of the APD. "Why don't we talk about this downtown."

At publishing time, Trump had been indicted again for the murder of the Democratic Party.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; biden; cnn; presidentialdebate; trump

1 posted on 06/28/2024 6:33:30 AM PDT by Ciaphas Cain
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To: Ciaphas Cain

BTTT!!!


2 posted on 06/28/2024 6:35:07 AM PDT by musicman (The future is just a collection of successive nows.)
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To: Ciaphas Cain

HaHa!!!


3 posted on 06/28/2024 6:37:32 AM PDT by fwdude ( )
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To: Ciaphas Cain

Time to call Georgy Soros’ affirmative action water buffalo and see which one wants this case. Depends on if it comes with a free love life or not.


4 posted on 06/28/2024 6:42:43 AM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (When did WE decide to make America a UN 5-Star Asylum Paradise for Socialist losers?)
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To: Ciaphas Cain
I thought the Democrat (non Democratic) Party had already suicided in an effort to keep up with the RINO Party.

I guess this will be another extension of the Statute of Extended Limitations and Special Upgrade to Felony clauses in the US Constitution (Brussels copy).

5 posted on 06/28/2024 6:43:42 AM PDT by Navy Patriot (Celebrate Decivilization)
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To: Ciaphas Cain
"He was like that when I got here!" LOL!

*TRUMP BUMP*

6 posted on 06/28/2024 6:43:43 AM PDT by Diana in Wisconsin (I don't have, 'Hobbies.' I'm developing a robust Post-Apocalyptic skill set. )
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To: Ciaphas Cain

👍👍👍Bee!!!!


7 posted on 06/28/2024 6:44:23 AM PDT by mad_as_he$$ (" Life is hard!" Tom Brady)
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To: Ciaphas Cain

“The game must be afoot, you know?” is a line I will remember and laugh about for a very long time.


8 posted on 06/28/2024 6:49:42 AM PDT by katana
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To: Ciaphas Cain

Ok, I spit my coffee out my nose on this headline. ROFLMAO!


9 posted on 06/28/2024 6:50:04 AM PDT by DCBryan1 (Inter arma enim silent leges! - Cicero )
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To: Ciaphas Cain

For once, I got the Bee before it could sting me.


10 posted on 06/28/2024 6:51:28 AM PDT by Socon-Econ (adi)
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To: All
Another

Fox News Declares Biden Winner Of Tonight's Debate

11 posted on 06/28/2024 6:53:58 AM PDT by mykroar ("It's Not the Nature of the Evidence; It's the Seriousness of the Charge." - El Rushbo)
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To: Ciaphas Cain

The Bee nails it again.


12 posted on 06/28/2024 6:58:34 AM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus…)
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To: Ciaphas Cain
Thank you CC.

Needed a good laugh after that fiasco last night.

13 posted on 06/28/2024 7:00:42 AM PDT by Churchillspirit (Pray for President Trump)
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To: Socon-Econ
LOL!

Me too.....

14 posted on 06/28/2024 7:03:40 AM PDT by Churchillspirit (Pray for President Trump)
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To: Ciaphas Cain

LOL!


15 posted on 06/28/2024 7:06:45 AM PDT by silent_jonny (Mene, mene, tekel, upharsin, Joe. The feet are at the door (Acts 5:9) 9-18-21)
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To: Ciaphas Cain

It says he was also indicted for murdering the Democrat Party.


16 posted on 06/29/2024 5:58:12 PM PDT by gitmo (If your theology doesn't become your biography, what good is it?)
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