Posted on 01/16/2024 8:54:41 AM PST by Twotone
With the Iowa Republican Caucus in full swing, it's time for us to confront our deepest, darkest fear: Donald Trump may actually get re-elected in November. As painful as it may be to face that fact, this reality means there are things liberals may need to think about buying up and hoarding.
The Babylon Bee is here to help with the following helpful list of things you should stockpile in case Trump takes the White House and kills democracy AGAIN:
1. "Gun-Free Zone" signs: To scare off the roving gangs of MAGA voters.
2. Bricks: For throwing through the windows of a local small business. For democracy.
3. Books that say "gay": You need to build up a stash before Trump burns them all.
4. Freeze-dried mail-in ballots: You'll need them to take back our democracy in 2028.
5. Every episode of Brian Stelter's Reliable Sources on DVD: There's no way those will be available for purchase in Trump's fascist America.
6. Masks & COVID tests: To provide you with peace of mind while in your bunker.
7. Emergency puberty blockers: In case you or a loved one ever need to trans a kid.
8. Kleenex: To use as you mourn the loss of our precious democracy. And while watching your Brian Stelter DVDs.
9. Pictures of Trump: To stare at hatefully every day.
Go! Get out there, hit every store you can find, and get all of this stuff while you still can!
They need eviction letters to get Trump out of their heads.
They left Xanax off the list.
I was thinking wire coat-hangers....
(Apologize in advance for my very dark sense of humor...)
10. A spare bedroom to hide the illegals who do their lawn.
10. Feminine hygiene products, because men can bleed, too.
11. Extra traffic lights for all of Generation X’ers who’ll retire and drive around during the day after 401K’s go up in value.
Updated passports.
What? No diapers on that list?
Whiskey and sleeping tablets?
Blurry pictures of a Bigmouth, Aunt TeeFah Sasquash stumbling through the tall trees in Oregon’s mountains wearing a I (heart) Democrat Democrazy T-shirt.
12. An updated “Only X years left” countdown after yet another warmageddon clock exprires.
At first I thought your were referring to do-it-yourself emergency lobotomies.
Good one!
13. A pantry full of rice boxes and syrup without black people on them so they can eat through the Trump years without being racist.
The bricks ain’t a joke....that WILL happen......AGAIN
didn’t see duct tape on the list. they will need lots of duct tape to try to keep the recovered parts of their brains together as much as MAGA voters will need “braincoats” if one is in a liberal crowd when it all blows up.
ROFL thanks for posting.
Make Liberals Scream Again!
Cats…they all have cats.
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