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Hollywood Movie Quality Expected To Improve Exponentially As Writers Go On Strike
Babylon Bee ^ | May 2, 2023 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 05/02/2023 12:58:26 PM PDT by george76

HOLLYWOOD, CA — An inexplicably-unforeseen outcome has begun to take form since Hollywood writers began their writer's strike to demand more writerly benefits for writers. Newly released movies and shows have improved in quality by exponential levels, packing theaters and raking in huge profits.

Millions of moviegoers have surprised critics by flocking to big screens to see films in which preachiness and intersectionality have been replaced with good storytelling.

"It was pretty jarring at first watching something not composed entirely of cookie-cutter sassy black women and gay dudes," said renewed moviegoer Michael McHale exiting a theater, "It felt wrong watching a well-written movie at first. But by the end, I was really into it, especially with the totally bonkers twist where the white guy was NOT the bad guy."

Plus, if rumors are to be believed, the world may soon be able to watch a romantic comedy involving a man and a woman who fall in love.

At publishing time, Disney had announced it would be pausing the release of movies set in the Marvel Cinematic Universe until the strike ended, causing the entire world to cry tears of joy.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee

1 posted on 05/02/2023 12:58:26 PM PDT by george76
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To: george76

Do they still make movies? Jeez, I haven’t seen one in years.


2 posted on 05/02/2023 1:00:17 PM PDT by ConservativeInPA ("How did you go bankrupt?" Bill asked. "Two ways," Mike said. "Gradually and then suddenly." )
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To: george76

ChatGPT4.0, the writers for late night comedy shows are going on strike. My wife, who can’t stop talking about you excellent recommendation for a general purpose cleaning formula, suggested that you could make an excellent replacement for those striking writers. How about an opening monologue in the style of Johnny Carson on some topic in your training set?
ChatGPT
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to “The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson”! It’s great to have you all here tonight. My name is ChatGPT 4.0, filling in as a guest host. Now, I know what you’re thinking - I’m an AI language model, what am I doing here? Well, with the late night comedy writers on strike, it’s time for me to show off my sense of humor! Buckle up, folks, because this is going to be a wild ride!

So, did you hear about the big news in the world of AI? A new robot was just invented that can do your laundry, cook your dinner, and take care of your kids! They’re calling it “The Spouse 3000”! But seriously, can you imagine the conversations at the dinner table? “Honey, please pass the salt... and the WD-40!”

And speaking of robots, there’s this new AI that’s been making headlines - it’s able to write poetry, paint masterpieces, and compose music. Just when we thought we were safe from robots taking our jobs, the artists are panicking too! The only thing it can’t do is tell a joke... Oh, wait a minute! I’m doing that right now!

You know what else has been big lately? Electric cars! They’re everywhere! I mean, I’ve heard of a silent film, but now we have silent traffic? The other day, I saw a guy in an electric car stuck in traffic, and he was so frustrated he got out and started pushing! When someone asked him what he was doing, he said, “I’m trying to jump-start it!”

Speaking of transportation, have you folks heard about the Hyperloop? It’s a high-speed transportation system where passengers travel in pods through vacuum-sealed tubes at speeds over 700 miles per hour! It’s so fast, by the time you figure out what time zone you’re in, you’re already in the next one! Can you imagine if they combine that with online dating? “I swiped right, and she was here in 15 minutes!”

But enough about technology, let’s talk about something that never goes out of style - politics! Now, politicians are always trying to one-up each other, right? Well, I heard that one candidate has a new strategy. Instead of promising a chicken in every pot, they’re promising a drone in every garage! That way, you can keep an eye on your neighbor’s chicken!

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a fantastic show for you tonight! So sit back, relax, and let’s have some fun. And remember, I’m ChatGPT 4.0, your AI late night comedy host, and I’m here all week!


3 posted on 05/02/2023 1:03:36 PM PDT by SubMareener (Save us from Quarterly Freepathons! Become a MONTHLY DONOR)
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To: george76

The Bee, always, makes me laugh!


4 posted on 05/02/2023 1:04:10 PM PDT by old school
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To: george76; All

Heard on interview shows:
—Mark Rothman, who wrote for the Odd
Couple, said stars Tony (Randall) and
Jack (Klugman) were given powers to
veto jokes and even get writers fired

—He’s since passed away but Bill Daily
said the scripts for I Dream of Jeannie
were absolutely horrible; but the ones
for Bob Newhart show were better


5 posted on 05/02/2023 1:07:52 PM PDT by raccoonradio
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To: george76

Sometimes I try to visualize how proposals for TV series are presented to network buyers. It is especially curious for series that get pulled after only a few episodes are shown or when the series gets cancelled.

Writers just ‘lift’ from existing series.

I have watched several medical dramas. One theme that shows up in them is the child-given-up years earlier by one of the drama regulars and years later turning up at the hospital as a doctor.

After a while of watching some crime dramas, one can usually figure out the villain within 15 minutes.

I am not sure a strike now — after 2 years of COVID shutdown and number of episodes reduced significantly — is a good idea. Networks can pull up literally thousands of shows to rerun. And they can always revert to more ‘reality’ programs.


6 posted on 05/02/2023 1:20:29 PM PDT by TomGuy
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To: raccoonradio

I loved the Bob Newhart shows .


7 posted on 05/02/2023 1:20:53 PM PDT by katykelly
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To: TomGuy
I find myself streaming shows I missed during my younger years that I slowly attended college while working full time (40-50 hours/week) and had little free time. I especially didn't have time in the evenings when those shows were on. Shows back then were a lot less woke.

I just finished Hunter. LOL

8 posted on 05/02/2023 1:30:25 PM PDT by Tell It Right (1st Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: george76

So with the strike, we are safe from rebooting of old TV shows. Great, but see if the writers can create shows that are not reality shows or reboots. I’d love to see a Western on or a Roman age drama. Hollywood ran out of ideas, so the writers should not be replaced. I think I could write a show or two.


9 posted on 05/02/2023 1:42:25 PM PDT by Deplorable American1776 (Guns don't kill people, LIBERALS DO!! Support the Second Amendment...)
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To: TomGuy

Writers, nowadays, have no “real-life” experience and, truly, lack imagination (like today’s current crop of auto-designers). They don’t employ subject-matter experts as advisors; especially on police and military shows. Some of that crap is so cloyingly stupid , I wanna gag! It’s obvious that the scripts are written based on the writers jaundiced depiction of what real life actually is. It’s sad that the purveyors of so-called entertainment are so disdainful of the consumer. Even, print media is subliterate.


10 posted on 05/02/2023 1:44:34 PM PDT by old school
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To: ConservativeInPA

I think they just re-make movies now, but I haven’t been to a theater for over a decade, so I can’t be sure.


11 posted on 05/02/2023 1:46:57 PM PDT by skr (Righteousness exalteth a nation: but sin is a reproach to any people. - Proverbs 14:34)
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To: katykelly

I loved Newhart especially, mostly because that came along when I was growing up. Dick Louden, the only sane man in a town full of lunatics. That show also had the best series finale EVER.


12 posted on 05/02/2023 2:39:15 PM PDT by Ciaphas Cain (#notmypedophile)
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To: raccoonradio

I never noticed. I guess Barbara Eden carried the show.


13 posted on 05/02/2023 2:44:53 PM PDT by scrabblehack
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To: TomGuy

The networks use focus groups (as well as ratings) to figure out which shows to cancel.

Low ratings can be misleading since it may take a while for a new show to gain fans—but focus groups showing the audience is bored, uninterested, or (especially these days with the woke garbage) hostile can tell the tale.


14 posted on 05/02/2023 2:48:57 PM PDT by cgbg (Claiming that laws and regs that limit “hate speech” stop freedom of speech is “hate speech”.)
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To: Tell It Right
I find myself streaming shows I missed during my younger years

Similar here. I usually worked a full time and part time job during my work years. I missed a lot of programs during those years. Now in retirement I watch more 'old' programs then new ones.

Streaming is the nearest thing to 'ala mode'. I can watch what I want, when I want. I managed to watch the full series in the last 15 years: Stargate, Babylon 5, The X Files, Hill Street Blues, NYPD Blue, Farscape, and many others.

I also watch a lot of Brit, NZ, and Aussie series. I do hate that many of their series are only 6 to 10 episodes with long, long waits between seasons.


15 posted on 05/02/2023 2:52:56 PM PDT by TomGuy
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To: george76

It had no place to go except up.


16 posted on 05/02/2023 3:28:54 PM PDT by Vaduz (....)
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To: ConservativeInPA

Saw Big George Foreman yesterday. It was an inspiring Christian story.


17 posted on 05/02/2023 3:45:56 PM PDT by cowboyusa (IT'S TIME TO PLAY COWBOYS AND MARXISTS!)
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To: george76

I have been enjoying the latest South Korean flicks and Bolly wood flicks. No PC BS. Men are manky and the women are feminine and “yummy.”

(OH noes,. Call Media Matters.)


18 posted on 05/02/2023 8:03:00 PM PDT by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes)
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