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Sick Of Same Old Crime And Violence, Chicago Tries Electing A Democrat This Time
BabylonBee.com ^ | Babylon Bee Staff

Posted on 04/05/2023 8:38:26 AM PDT by servo1969

CHICAGO, IL — After a century of electing nothing but Democrats and getting only corruption, death, and poverty in return, Chicago residents have decided to make a change to the status quo by electing a different Democrat this time.

"Maybe this Democrat will be different," said one local business owner while sweeping up the broken glass from her store after getting robbed for the 15th time this year. "We tried Democrats 4 years ago, and also before that, and before that, and before that, and before that, and before that, and before that, and before that, and before that, and before that, and before that, and before that, going back to the early 1900s. I sure wish there was some other kind of thing we could choose that would help."

"Oh well."

As violence and despair continue to rise in the city, Chicago remains hopeful that maybe this Democrat politician implementing the same Democrat policies will somehow achieve a better result than all the other times it's been tried.

"I sure hope something changes soon," said Chicago resident Oprah Winfrey from her luxury high-rise condo. "I heard a rumor that my assistant's driver's intern's errand boy got shot in the face last week! Terrible!"

At publishing time, thousands of criminals had celebrated another Democrat being elected by firing their guns in the air.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylon; brandonjohnson; chicago; gentrification; illinois; johnson; reparations; satire

1 posted on 04/05/2023 8:38:26 AM PDT by servo1969
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To: servo1969

Well, this time they elected a Communist so maybe things will be... different?


2 posted on 04/05/2023 8:39:13 AM PDT by servo1969
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To: servo1969

They deserve the government the voted for..................


3 posted on 04/05/2023 8:41:15 AM PDT by Red Badger (Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegal aliens are put up in hotels.....................)
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To: servo1969

It’s one more example that once the people are indoctrinated and therefore, sufficiently stupid, they will follow the media without question.

The major cities are taking this country down, and I don’t see any way to stop it.


4 posted on 04/05/2023 8:41:39 AM PDT by brownsfan (It's going to take real, serious, hard times to wake the American public.)
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To: servo1969

Meet the new Boss.

Same as the old Boss................


5 posted on 04/05/2023 8:41:50 AM PDT by Red Badger (Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegal aliens are put up in hotels.....................)
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To: servo1969

ALL urban democrats are basically neo-marxists now.

Its not like there is any choice.


6 posted on 04/05/2023 8:42:02 AM PDT by PGR88
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To: servo1969

I suppose that this could be seen as cruel but I hope that under this new Maoist the murder rate in $hitcago doubles!


7 posted on 04/05/2023 8:42:56 AM PDT by Gay State Conservative (Two Words: BANANA REPUBLIC!)
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To: servo1969

So Chicago voters had the choice between: (1) a tough-on-crime candidate offering hope of at least trying to change the status quo; and (2) a defund-the-police-type hack politician who promises more of the same but happens to check the right skin-color box. And, of course, chose @2.

This is reminiscent of the Los Angeles mayoral election last year wherein voters had the choice between a law-and-order, pro-business candidate who happened to be white and the more-of-the-same-liberal-crap black candidate. And again, they chose the latter.


8 posted on 04/05/2023 8:44:40 AM PDT by irishjuggler
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To: servo1969

The definition of insanity is “ doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results “.

If Chicago replaced Lightfoot with this nut, they’ve jumped out of the frying pan, and into the fire.


9 posted on 04/05/2023 8:46:13 AM PDT by BrexitBen
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To: servo1969
That city is RUINED!!

We now have 3 CHOCOLATE cities....New Orleans, New York and Chicago.....WHITE PEOPLE NOT WELCOME!

10 posted on 04/05/2023 8:46:22 AM PDT by Ann Archy (Abortion....... The HUMAN Sacrifice to the god of Convenience.)
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To: Ann Archy
We now have 3 CHOCOLATE cities....New Orleans, New York and Chicago.....WHITE PEOPLE NOT WELCOME!

And the suburbs aren't even vanilla anymore.

11 posted on 04/05/2023 8:47:04 AM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: dfwgator

Neapolitan.


12 posted on 04/05/2023 8:48:19 AM PDT by Ann Archy (Abortion....... The HUMAN Sacrifice to the god of Convenience.)
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To: Gay State Conservative

I think you could be correct, and this will not deter them from electing a democrat.

My theory is that these people are used to the murder and violence much the same way a hardened combat vet is used to the combat environment. Soon it becomes a way of life. People know who the good guys are and the bad guys and adjust accordingly. The Chicagoans are born into this and know no other way of life.

The difference is the incentives the rat party offers, which is likely payments and projects that benefit the inner city crowd.

This is my theory. To back it up I met a young black girl who felt unsafe at Minot, ND because there were no sirens going off such as police and ambulances. The sirens told her she was being protected. This is a sad way to live.


13 posted on 04/05/2023 8:51:50 AM PDT by redfreedom (You can vote your way into socialism, but you may have to shoot your way out.)
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To: redfreedom
It cannot be denied that minorities are victims of crime...particularly violent crime...in numbers that are way out of line with their representation in the general population. And that probably goes double for minority women and girls. So it's understandable that this girl would find the sound of sirens reassuring.
14 posted on 04/05/2023 9:24:21 AM PDT by Gay State Conservative (Two Words: BANANA REPUBLIC!)
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To: servo1969

Chicago is gone


15 posted on 04/05/2023 10:35:22 AM PDT by Lee25 ( )
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To: servo1969
Hey Jackass!!!
16 posted on 04/05/2023 10:37:05 AM PDT by NorthMountain (... the right of the peopIe to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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