Posted on 12/27/2021 2:39:48 PM PST by rightwingintelligentsia
Is there anything positive we can say about 2021? Yes. We can say that it was marginally better than 2020. Granted, this is not high praise. It’s like saying that somebody is marginally nicer than Hitler. But it’s something.
What was better about 2021? For one thing, people finally emerged from their isolated pandemic cocoons and started connecting with others. Granted, the vast majority of the people who connected with us this year wanted to discuss our car’s extended warranty. But still.
Another improvement was that most stores got rid of those one-way anti-COVID arrows on the floor. Remember those, from 2020? You’d be halfway down a supermarket aisle, and you’d realize that you’d gone past the Cheez-Its, but you couldn’t turn around and go back because you’d be going AGAINST THE ARROWS, which meant YOU WOULD GET COVID.
Ha ha! Was that stupid, or what? Fortunately in 2021, we followed the Science, which decided that the coronavirus does not observe floor arrows. On the other hand, the Science could not make up its mind about masks, especially in restaurants. Should everybody in the restaurant wear them? Should only the staff wear them? Should people who are standing up wear them, but not people who are sitting down, which would seem to suggest that the virus can also enter our bodies via our butts? We still don’t know, and we can’t wait to find out what the Science will come up with for us next.
(Excerpt) Read more at miamiherald.com ...
2020 sucked and 2021 said hold my beer. I think 2022 will make you long for the good old days of 2020.
Jeez. Just stop, Dave. Even after excising the stupid Trump jokes your essay is not at all funny. Just stay in retirement so we can just remember when you were funny.
I’m with you. Dave Barry is not funny anymore. I actually wondered if he had died since I never see or hear of him.
Dave Barry’s still alive? Jeez…
I have no respect for political correctness in comedy.
maybe the real dave barry is actually no longer with us and this was really written by a zombie dave barry.
with sundown syndrome humor— quite appropriate to the times, actually.
ha, ha.
Yes, boring.
The only reason I scanned the whole thing was to see if Barry mentioned resident Brandon’s dementia. Nope! Of course not.
Barry is a liberal hack who left what talent he did have in the past.
Two big news items happened today. 1) Biden said there is no federal solution to COVID. 2) CDC shortened quarantine to not adversely impact the economy.
This signals that the democrats know they are going to lose bigtime if they don’t change something. And they are now moving to end the pandemic. They will lose control over our lives, but they will all be out of power if they keep up this charade. Better to have some power than no power.
I liked the excerpt you posted. Made sense. Didn’t read the rest.
It goes downhill from there.
I will need to check to see if this important event was covered on FR.
Don't remember it ...
Figured as much from the posts. Whew!
I agree completely.
Once you’ve read the Bee, all other attempts at satire seem sad and lifeless.
There were a couple threads on it:
Camels Kicked Out of $66M Beauty Pageant for Using Botox
Saudi camel beauty pageant cracks down on cosmetic enhancements
It was 2018 or 2019 but Dave Berry did make me laugh out loud when he described ransomware as “like a Windows update...except someone knows how to fix it.” Hasn’t happened since.
That is hilarious!
I thought the word was “Unity” for the year! It was always disingenuous.
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