"This is not Mel Tormé."
Posted on 12/18/2021 6:26:46 AM PST by WeaslesRippedMyFlesh
It’a that time of year again — that very special season when you can’t walk into a grocery store without getting ambushed by “Jingle Bell Rock” or dive-bombed by Paul McCartney wishing you a “Wonderful Christmastime.” Every artist who ever sells more than two records eventually tries a Christmas tune. The amount of great Christmas music out there is staggering. But along with all that Yuletide goodness comes plenty of Yuletide dreck.
Our list of the worst Christmas songs includes psychotic butcherings of beloved classics, horrific attempts at new standards, hideous novelty tunes, and more. At the family Christmas party in hell, this is what’s on shuffle. All that’s missing is your blowhard uncle up n your face yelling about how Biden stole the election. Happy Holidays!
It made the Freeper worst 20 Christmas Songs list.
High bar for entry. Clarence sounds like he’s crying in agony with his opening ho ho ho’s.
I’ll publish when we get to 20, currently 17...
Listened to Stewball for the first time. I’m surprised he didn’t get stewed.
"This is not Mel Tormé."
“I absolutely hate, despise, abhor “The Little Drummer Boy””
Probably the difference between us is that I don’t pay that much attention to the words.
I’d say also give the writers of the words of the hymns some latitude in their expression.
Happy Christmas - not only the worst song ever written, but in fact the worst song ever plagiarized.
I liked it!
Good Call.
I’ll rent in on Amazon tonight to decorate the tree.
Heading to Frankenmuth shortly to get some new ornaments, and a chicken dinner.
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Anything by Frank Sinatra with a Christmas theme.
Anything by Andy Williams because it is already someone else's song.
Actually, that’s Number 2, mangled by Maroon 5.
I don’t think that would have been so bad if he had not repeated the refrain over and over and over . . .
Great day for Bronner’s, Zenders/Bavarian Inn, main street shopping.
Jealous now.
They did list that one at No. 2.
“All I Want for Christmas is You NOT Play Mariah Carey”
This song hasn’t been written or recorded yet, but I’m pretty confident with a decent melody it would be a big holiday hit.
We made it to 18 Christmas stink bombs.
Freeper top 18 Worst Christmas Songs in no particular order:
Wonderful Christmas Time – Paul McCartney
War is Over – John Lennon / Yoko Band Wrecker
Last Christmas – George Michael
Jingle Bells – Barbara Streisand
Ho, Ho, Ho – Elton John
Dominic the Donkey – Lou Monte
All I want for Christmas – Mariah Carey
Christmas in Jail – The Youngsters
Christmas at Denny’s – Randy Stonehill
Christmas Song – The Chipmunks
Christmas Wrapping – The Waitresses
Santa Tell Me – Ariana Grande
Mary did you know – various, all crap
White Christmas – Katy Perry (drunk)
Santa Baby – Eartha Kitt
The Christmas Shoes – NEWSONG
Santa Clause is Coming to Town – Bruce Springsteen
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas – Gayla Peevey
Full name:
Happy Christmas (War is Over) John Lennon
Absolutely. All of the above.
Santa Baby. The WORST.
“Santa Baby” is a criminal assault on the ears and comes in a distant second to marbles in a blender.
“The Little Drummer Boy” is basically this.
“ Pardon me ma’am, I know you just spend all day riding a donkey and then gave birth in a cold drafty barn but I thought you and your child would enjoy a drum solo”
While I like Emerson, Lake, and Palmer, I’m not a fan of “Father Christmas.” It’s a cynical tune if you listen to the lyrics.
Yes’ “Run With the Fox” is a tune I like as a Yes tune. But I wouldn’t put it on any Christmas playlist.
However, when the BBC did their radio adaptation of The Lord of the Rings back in 1978 or so, many songs and instrumental pieces were composed for it. One of my favorites is “A Elbereth Gilthoniel.” (Which is played when The Fellowship is staying in Rivendell, IIRC.) It is not in any way a “Christmas” song. However, the music, melody, singing, and sleighbells evoke the spirit and sounds of Christmas-time. I’d put it on any playlist if only to have listeners guess which tune doesn’t really belong.
Santa Baby by anyone, but especially Mariah Carey, is the absolute worst in my opinion.
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