Posted on 08/18/2020 6:31:47 AM PDT by BipolarBob
SACRAMENTO, CA—The state of California, home to some of the world’s most innovative technology companies, is struggling to provide a steady flow of electricity to its residents, sources confirmed Monday.
"We will continue to be the most advanced hub of technological progress as soon as we get the power back on here," said Governor Newsom.
Electricity, which first made its debut in 1882, is a luxury Californians have come to rely upon for modern indulgences such as dishwashers, laundry machines, and indoor lighting. A recent heatwave has sparked the need for rolling blackouts throughout the state that is home to Silicon Valley, technology’s most advanced center for research and development.
Experts hope the collective brainpower housed in these technology meccas might be harnessed to solve the crisis. Sources predict these geniuses will one day provide Californians with enough reliable power to toast some bread while their neighbor runs the vacuum cleaner.
Residents of the 49 other, less advanced states hope California’s efforts might benefit them as well, and they have been glued to their televisions and computers around the clock hoping to hear some good news.
Remember Gray Davis? We have heard this song before, and it did not end well then, either.
No fossil fuels? Then, pray tell, what will be the primary energy source that may be turned into electricity in sufficient quantities to maintain and expand the “California life style”?
If any such thing still exists. Maybe they DESERVE to be Venezuela.
You don’t miss the water until the well runs dry.
What, windmills and solar power isn’t cutting it? Maybe they need more batteries.
The shut down their nukes and did not let allow sufficient fossil fueled generator stations to be built.
The did it to themselves. No sympathy from me.
California is progressively progressing downward, victims of their own success.
Can’t they plug the grid into a Tesla Supercharger and fix this problem?
The way to keep the lights on is to VOTE EVERY SINGLE DEMOCRAT OUT OF OFFICE.
He should encourage fracking and drilling in ANWR, //sarc//
Issue one to every teacher that refuses to go to work..
Wait, I thought the Bee was a satire site.
Yeah, so why go from satire to being a real news site? I don’t get it.
To be fair, it's all about timing. Today's satire is tomorrow's (or the evening's) headlines. Maybe they missed the window of satire opportunity on this one.
Maybe the windmills will run a little faster when the Santa Anna winds start up.
Wait....
I thought the Babylon Bee was a satire site.....
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