Posted on 03/02/2017 10:08:03 AM PST by blueunicorn6
I talked to a Russian.
I admit it.
I'm not particularly proud of it, but so be it.
It was at EXPO 1974 in Spokane, WA.
Me and a couple of my high school buddies snuck into the Russian pavilion.
We were in back when the Russian security guys caught us.
They asked us what we were doing back there.
I told them, "Looking for your spy equipment you filthy commies!"
They chased us outside.
There you have it.
I expect to be denounced by the Democrats.
I talked to a Russian.
I'd have talked to the Chinese if they'd given me a suitcase full of bribe money like they gave Democrat Vice President Al Gore.
I have absolutely no problem talking to filthy commies and calling them filthy commies.
Al did it for money, so I guess he's just a whore.
You work at New Orleans Alcoholics Anonymous?
Good thing.
Judging from the posts, we have a lot of drunks at FR.
Well, I went home with the waitress
The way I always do
How was I to know
She was with the Russians, too
When I was a GI stationed in Germany in 1988, I stuck my tongue in a cute Russian girl named Irina’s ear in Szekesfehervar, Hungary. I didn’t get any farther because the chaperone lady took her away. It was in a club and a bunch of Russian engineering students were there. True story.
Aha!
I demand that you recuse yourself from bringing Russian waitresses to your home!
Just go to her place. Your place is probably a mess anyway.
Back in 88 I also got shitfaced with a Russian officer in Kapolnasnyek, Hungary. Cold vodka, pickled vegetables and Janice Joplin albums.
Lol
LOL
Thank you
I remember when I talked to two Russians three years ago. They stopped at a farm I was managing and bought about fifty pounds of tomatoes. I sold them the tomatoes, but the whole thing seemed mighty suspicious to me. I mean, what are two grown men going to do with fifty pounds of fresh tomatoes? I think they were really visiting the farm to scout out a place to set up spy equipment.
Needless to say, they could tell I was a patriot and abandoned their quest to use my farm for a spy base.
Aha!
So you were stationed in Germany, and there you are playing tongue fondue with some commie girl’s ear in Hungary?
That violates so many laws, rules, regulations, orders, and standards of good hygiene that I don’t know where to begin.
I demand that you recuse yourself from spear-tonguing defenseless commie girls in Hungary!
Jeez, how did you know?
You Russian spies must have a camera hidden in my house somewhere!
Well, evidently, with that fancy spear-tongue of yours, you didn’t need a pickle fork.
The Russians love Janis Joplin.
“Me and Bobby McGee riding a tank through Budapest.”
So.
You’re the one.
Did you ever hear of the T-93 Russian tank?
The “T” stands for tomato.
They use them for weapons.
Have you ever been thunked by a tomato?
Well, I have.
That’s how my act ended most nights.
It’s not fun.
I suppose that now we are in a tomato race with the Russians.
I demand that you recuse yourself from throwing tomatoes!
I’d probably be better off if I actually did, but no, I work at the government agency as a contractor. I feel sad that they distort the record on how much global warming is taking place. Fortunately, the branch I work for is not in charge of that, so at least I don’t have to feel ashamed as well.
Hey, I was just doing my part to improve US-Soviet relations. You could travel to Hungary on a passport at the time, but needed a Visa.
It would be foolish to trust the Russians. However, I know for certain that Trump is no fool and especially not a wimpy lead from behind, red line in the sand, Obama or reset button Hillary.
I demand that Sarah Palin recuse herself from dressing!
God rest her sweet departed soul
All with backwards letters that the Russians are famous for I bet.
Wow, you too?
My Russian was a petite blond.
She was selling homemade jewelry at a street fair.
In Sierra Vista, AZ.
I said, “Dobry Den’.”
She said, “Nu, konyeshno!”
“I expect to be denounced by the Democrats...I talked to a Russian.”
Actually, you should be in the DEMOCRAT HALL OF FAME, for trying to achieve PEACE in our (their) day, when Russia was trying to blow us off the map.
But now 1984 has passed and Russia is OUR ENEMY (this week)...so maybe they won’t accept you after all.
I represented an Afghanistan war veteran in Court on a DUI. He was there in the 1980s. Yep, he was Russian. Had some very interesting stories from the other perspective of fighting there. Nice guy. Just another soldier trying to do his duty and serve his country. Serious PTSD issues which should come as no surprise.
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