Posted on 12/06/2016 11:08:19 AM PST by conservative98
DEAR man on the street,
I’m writing to ask for your help.
As a female runner, I am constantly aware of my safety when I’m out on an evening run. What is behind me? Do I hear anything strange? Why is that man running towards me? What is making those bushes rustle?
And I am always home before dark.
Author Margaret Atwood said, “Men are afraid women will laugh at them. Women are afraid men will kill them.”
You may think that’s hyperbole, but I promise you, it’s not. Every woman I know has been in a situation at least once in their life when they thought their life was actually in danger.
Can you imagine that?
When we go out running, we are putting ourselves in a vulnerable situation. We’re out of our comfort zone, and often on our own.
While the stories of rape and murder are the ones that gain the most media attention, we’re aware that it’s unlikely to happen to us. Unlikely, but always possible.
What we’re more like to encounter, though, is sexual harassment: catcalls, leering, suggestive comments and gesticulations … the list goes on.
What that harassment does is remind us that we are forever vulnerable. That we can never feel truly safe.
A recent study conducted by Runner’s World found that a whopping 43 per cent of women sometimes experience harassment on the street when they run. That’s in contrast to the 4 per cent of men who experienced the same.
The problem with harassment is that it isn’t just lighthearted banter — and it’s certainly not a compliment. (Has a call of ‘nice tits’ ever been the start of a great love story?) Harassment is all about power, and letting us know we’re in that man’s space.
Why am I telling you this? Because as a man, you fall into one of two categories:
1. You’re a genuinely nice guy who needs to be more aware of this problem
2. You’re a man who makes women feel unsafe when she’s running in public (shame on you!).
Either way, the fact that women feel unsafe when they’re out running in public is directly attributable to men. Victorian teen Masa Vukotic was murdered while out on a regular evening walk. She was in a park, in daylight, only a 500 metres from her home when she was killed. Source: Facebook
So why are all the articles and safety tips aimed at women? Why are we gathering safety groups to run with, running with personal alarms, and cutting our runs short so we’re not out after dark?
Why aren’t we asking men to fix what they broke?
I know, I know it’s #notallmen, but the thing is, it’s some men. Runner’s World reported that it was men in 94 per cent of cases where women felt threatened. And there are enough men out there contributing to this problem to make most women at least wary when they go running by themselves.
The problem is that women can’t tell the difference between those problem men and the genuinely nice guys.
If you’re one of the good guys, you probably don’t think of yourself as intimidating but your presence in certain circumstances can make a woman feel unnerved. If you don’t believe me, ask the women you know. Like many other women in Australia, Masa Vukotic regularly exercised in a local park But being alone she was vulnerable, and she was killed here at Koonung Creek Linear Park, in Doncaster, Melbourne. Picture: Chad Van Estrop
The good news is you’re in a great position to help us to feel more safe when we’re out running. Here’s what you can do:
• Don’t run directly behind us at the same pace. Either overtake or fall behind.
• When you’re overtaking us, say something like, ‘Passing on your left’. And then pass quickly.
• Don’t hang around running trails or paths wearing a hoodie and doing nothing in particular.
• Smile and/or wave as you run past us — we like feeling like we’re part of a community. But ignoring us works fine too, if that’s your thing.
• Don’t stop and chat. Mid-run is no place to strike up a new friendship.
• Keep eye contact to a minimum. Anything longer than two seconds is creepy.
• If you see a woman who could be being harassed, stop and ask if she needs help. At worst, you’re wrong and you feel a little sheepish. At best, you could stop something terrible from happening.
• Tell us if you’ve seen something threatening ahead. Are the lights under the bridge out? We love to know stuff like that.
• If a woman is wearing headphones, and you absolutely must approach her for some reason, do it from the front.
• Don’t ask us for help if your car or bike has broken down. Find someone else.
• Give us a wide berth when you’re passing and share the footpath. Even better, step off to the side. You already have global domination; you can give us a bit of concrete.
• There is no reason to gesticulate towards your crotch. Don’t even scratch yourself until you’ve passed us.
• Don’t spit anywhere near us please.
• If you have a female partner or friend who runs, ask her if she’d like some company.
As for the smaller set of men, who have contributed to this feeling of being unsafe for women everywhere, I have a special set of requests for you:
• Stop leering.
• Stop commenting on our bodies.
• Stop catcalling.
• Stop propositioning us.
• Stop groping us.
• Stop flashing us.
• Stop raping us.
• Stop murdering us.
So please, share the responsibility for making women feel safe, and make the streets a fun place to run again.
Open carry can be a great equalizer.
• Stop groping us.
• Stop flashing us.
• Stop raping us.
• Stop murdering us.
Wow, she starts out sounding sort of reasonable, and then ends up THERE?
Hm. I am all for not making people uncomfortable. But how about this?
How about you stop with all the “women can do anything a man can do” nonsense, and we go forward from there.
If no, you do just like us, then, and go out and run and take what comes.
What a load of tripe.
Dang that’s a lotta rules!
Shut up and run, yoga pants.
I guess that “equality” thing doesn’t stand up to scrutiny.
“Equal except when we aren’t” is more like it.
Why doesn’t she just get her exercise in the kitchen...making sammiches...?
My daughter and granddaughter are runners———I just keep my fingers crossed and pray.
.
• It will help if you’re psychic, too.
Buy a gun. learn how to properly use it, get a concealed carry permit and buy a fanny pack. Now you can run without any more fear than you would have going shopping.
So much wrong with this.
1. You’re not gonna “educate” rapists and murders out of being rapists and murderers.
2. Asking men to make you “feel” more safe isn’t gonna me you BE more safe.
And then the usual BS, where the author demonstrates reckless activity in the face of predators who dong GAF. Like wearing headphones while running? YOU are putting yourself at risk and no man is gonna make you feel better about that.
Open carry can be a great equalizer.So can a german shephard.
It’s my job to make strange women feel safe?
Unbelievable.
Exactly. Hey lady, take responsibility for your own safety and start packing.
I stopped reading at “You already have global domination”.
Listen. You have nothing to fear from me. I resent your lumping all men into your all-inclusive category “rapist.”
If I ever saw someone trying to hurt you, I would kill them. Your welcome.
Otherwise go to hell.
My advice after reading all that - find another place to jog...: )
OK, there was some over-the-top stuff there. But the article made many good points. Well worth reading!
As a side note, I’ll never walk close to a lone woman who is in an isolated area (a parking garage, etc.). I’ll hang back a bit and give her plenty of space. But I’ll keep a lookout, just in case.
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