Posted on 04/05/2016 5:38:26 PM PDT by Phinneous
Tell your FNG story!
I just saw a locked thread so couldn't post there-- wherin one FReeper calls another NOOB.
How young must one be on FR to be a NOOB? So I looked... 2010!! I figured it was a joke as the accuser's account was a 2016 sign-up. SO....
At my first squadron as an ensign, fresh outta Electronic Warefare school (se habla espanol.. any guesses where? Second hint, ground-based naval aircraft...) I showed up at the O-club for lunch. I'm a normal guy, not too much attitude for a typical JO. When allofa sudden, another fella I recognized from flight school (we were both NFOs... back of the bus, self-loading-baggage, not pilots) with a funny last name, RIPE for hazing (Muckenthaller-- "What the F*ck, MUCK?!" was common speech I'd come to find out.") Muckenthaller, himself with one month in the squadron sees me come in and announces very loudly to all assembled,
"Hey guys, here's [Phinneous,] the NEW GUY"
You couldn't imagine the abuse that still-obvious-FNG took for both of us for piping up like that while still being an obvious FNUGA, NOOB, NOOBIE, F'in NEW GUY.
So who has a shorter NOOB story??
If I recall correctly, A+Bert wanted to take you to a taxidermist. Based on the Texas Cowboy threads, I don’t think you’d make a good addition to a trophy room. Better you stay here. ;)
The CHENG's first words were to ask me if I had all my uniforms with me. I said that they were in my car. He told me to go check into the Bachelor Officer's quarters. I was NOT to actually go to my room but wait for the ship's driver to come get me. I was to bring my uniforms and any valuables back to the ship.
45 minutes later PO Jones and fireman Schmedlap (not their real names) picked me up. 30 minutes after returning to the ship we got under way for a week with me on the bridge as Junior Officer of the Deck (JOOD) under instruction. 30 minutes after we cleared the outer marker the Officer of the Deck (OOD) tells me to report to the Goat Locker (Chief's quarters) and sends to messenger of the watch to show me where it was.
I knew better than to enter the Chief's quarters without knocking. Even the Captain knocks and requests permission to enter. I quickly found out why I was there. I was to act as defense council for a Lieutenant being initiated as an honorary chief. He had been selected for Chief before getting his commission but never had a Chief's initiation.
Talk about getting thrown into the deep end of the Navy. I come from a Navy family and knew to play along with what ever they told me to do. All went well. Evidently the Chiefs thought I was a good sport about the whole thing as they went out of their way to help me for the 2 months I was there. I learned a lot and appreciated my Navy schools more.
Later when I was a Lieutenant myself and had two members of my division make Chief. The Chiefs wanted me to be the defense council for them. When they learned I had already done it I got to sit next to the CO while my numerical replacement played defense council.
"Ceterum censeo 0bama esse delendam."
Garde la Foi, mes amis! Nous nous sommes les sauveurs de la République! Maintenant et Toujours!
(Keep the Faith, my friends! We are the saviors of the Republic! Now and Forever!)
LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)
BZ. Great story.
Are ya still wearing them?
If you hate a n00b, send them to the religious forum.
That will fix them.
LOL. The Catholic Caucus LOVES to hear about the Torah....
Most everyday guys have no idea what they are getting into in that forum.
Hoo wee!
MurrayMom and A+bert! Those were Not the days!
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