Oops! I forgot to supply the link. More stories there.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=626509
Such jokes are a betrayal of trust. The person so duped may never believe the joker again. Nor can anyone else trust that person.
Back when I worked in the bindery, the boss sent some idiot on a 200 mile round trip to get a paper stretcher from another shop.
Don’t forget a.spool of flight line.
In the sixties, I’d take the Greyhound from Camp Pendleton up to L.A. for weekends..........one driver laughingly told me he couldn’t count how many times he’d been saluted.
I was once sent to get a part from Will Call.
Ask for Will Call they said.
One of the funniest stories I ever heard was from a guy I knew who had enlisted in the Navy, and was sent to look for prop wash on the day they had to wash the helicopters.
He almost got taken in, but some joker said “and while you’re there, get 50 feet of shoreline”. He knew what “shoreline” was, and then immediately figured out what “propwash” was.
This was not a direct order from his CO.
He went back to his CO and said “they sent me to look for propwash. I don’t think I’m going to find any. If I don’t find any by the end of the day, can I just go home? The CO said “sure”.
He called in from home and told the guys who sent him a story about going hither and yon, and being told “we’re fresh out”, or “I think the guys on the other side of the base have some”, really laid it on thick, and concluded by saying “I don’t think anyone has prop wash. Can I go home?” They let him go home.
They did this a few more times, and he played “Mickey the Dunce” each time. The last time they sent him out in the morning, so he couldn’t go home. Instead he went to the enlisted mens’ club.
The guys who sent him found him in there at lunch time shooting pool. They asked him what he was doing. He said “looking for propwash. I looked everywhere else, I thought they might have some here, but they don’t.”
The guy shooting pool with him said “Yeah, last time he was in here looking for it, they didn’t have any either.”
He said after that they stopped treating him like “the new guy”.
Don’t forget getting the newbies in the Navy up on deck to look in the box to see the “Seabat”..
Friend of mine in the Air Force (years ago), used to send newbies out for a can of “cloud eradicator” so they could take photos from the plane, put the “eradicator” on it so they could see through the clouds..
We used to put newbies on the bow of the ship and tell them to look for the mail buoy..
Good times..
And do not forget to go get 50 feet of waterline! Oh, and get some relative bearing grease, too! ;-)
AWOL Private Returns After Seven Years With Box Of Grid Squares
I take it your dad was in the merchant marine?
I was an ordinary seaman on a Great Lakes iron ore carrier and I remember the chief engineer sent me on a twenty minute trip looking for sky hooks.
That poor wiper-he should never have been fired for following what he thought were legitimate orders of the third assistant engineer and the third mate.
I worked at a garden store /nursery and my first task was to get a “branch straightener” for my manager.
On a boomer, I fell for the “go back aft and get a filament repair kit” ruse.
I need a gallon of RADAR paint.
Would a submarine have a Hide-a-Key under the hull?
I’m betting You got one or two for this...
Army
Great stuff to play on NUGS (New Ugly Guy)
Helicopter watch on top of the barracks
Go get a box of LOBS (direction finding - Line Of Bearings)
Got a new girl in. Sent her to maint. to get a Receiver Prophylactic Cover. They sent her to another section. Everyone played along and she was sent all over the station before someone had pity on her and let her know there was no such thing :)
We had a know it all city punk who caused a lot of problems in our division onboard our ship. He was a grade-A PITA. His rating was GMT, which was Gunner’s Mate Tech (ASROC).
His fellow GMTs were tired of his constant mouthing off so they set him up. They told him that a school billet had opened up for someone from the Division for “ASROC In-flight Maintenance Technician” School. The ASROC was a ballistic, un-guided weapon payload (torpedo or depth charge) with a rocket booster. The only way you could affect it in-flight was by riding it (could only be done once).
Well, Mr. Know It All got all fired up and submitted the chit requesting the school which made it to the XO before he was finally brought back to reality. He was extremely embarrassed, as he should have been.
