Posted on 07/18/2014 5:26:53 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
During a World Economic Summit, Barack Obama, Mexican President Felipe Calderón, Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin, and French President Nicolas Sarkozy are ceremonially riding in Japan's newest bullet train. As you might know all of these political leaders have big egos and this is what ensued.
Barack Obama says, "This is a fine bottle of wine Nicolas".
Upon hearing this, President Nicolas Sarkozy throws out a case of France's finest wine and says, "In France, fine wine is bountiful and plenty!"
Not to be outdone by Vladimir Putin, who then throws out two cases of Russia's finest Vodka, "In Russia, premier vodka spirits flow like the Volga River".
President Obama not wanting to seem weak, thinks for a moment, looks at Mexican president Felipe Calderón, and throws him out the window.
A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal immigrant in the bushes right by the border fence in Texas, he pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now."
The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senior, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!"
The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I'm going to make it hard for him and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use 3 english words in a sentence."
The Mexican, of course, agrees.
The Border Patrol Agent tells him, "The 3 words are Green, Pink and Yellow.......Now use all them in 1 sentence."
The Mexican man thinks really hard for about 2 minutes, then says, "Hmmm, Ok...... The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?"
A Russian arrives in New York City as a new immigrant to the United States . He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you Mr. American for letting me into this country, giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care, and a free education!"
The passerby says, "You are mistaken, I am a Mexican."
The man goes on and encounters another passerby. "Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in America ."
The person says, "I not American, I Vietnamese."
The new arrival walks farther, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand, and says, "Thank you for wonderful America !
That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East . I am not American."
He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?"
She says, "No, I am from Africa ."
Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the Americans?"
The African lady checks her watch and says, "Probably at work.."
Should be a new one out today...
http://www.vulture.com/2014/07/weird-al-yankovic-releasing-8-videos-in-8-days.html
I had to go back and show my two older kids the original videos first, then show them the parody vids.
Nirvana Teen Spirit. Jacksons Bad and Beat it. Green Day’s American Idiot.
Much funnier when you know what is being made fun of...
We all know about Pavlov’s experiment. Every time he rang a bell, the dog would drool. What isn’t recorded was the effect on Pavlov. For the rest of his life, every time he heard a bell, he was overcome by the urge to feed a dog.
I have a rewritten a poem that updates the one at the statue of Liberty:
A former Colossus
Not like the old liberty of American fame
With her torch light shinning reason across the land
Here at parched desert, no law will stand
A falling giant puts out his flame
A corrupt elite who hates his name
Lover of moochers with open hand
gives world-wide welcome with sick command
Using and abusing children for their game
Use ancient lies, some storied pomp! cries he
With scheming lips Give me your lazy, your poor,
Your spoiled masses yearning for stuff thats free
The criminal rejects of your teeming shore.
Send these, the worthless, train mangled to me,
just vote for me to open our door!
You are so insane! I LOVE it!
Too bad the didn’t collaborate to prevent someone else...
Ro , Ah and Ma are not valid symbols. Ra is radon but it’s number is 86. The elemental essentials of silliness are still valid however.
I know. Right!?!
;-)
love your tag line...I hate the word “hashtag” (actually don’t think it’s a real word) it’s like nails on a chalkboard to my ears
# is the pound or number sign!!
Anyone else out there think that twitter (especially tweets by adults) is the most stupid form of communication ever invented?
also love your photo!
picture.....giggle....giggle
great pic!
Outside a small Macedonian village a lone Catholic nun keeps a quiet watch over a silent convent. She is the last caretaker of this site of significant historical developments, spanning more than 2,000 years.
When Sister Maria Cyrilla of the Order of the Perpetual Watch dies, the convent of St. Elias will be closed by the Eastern Orthodox Patriarch of Macedonia.
However, that isnt likely to happen soon, as Sister Maria, 53, enjoys excellent health. By her own estimate, she walks 10 miles daily about the grounds of the convent, which once served as a base for the army of Attila the Hun.
In more ancient times, a Greek temple to Eros, the god of love, occupied the hilltop site.
Historians say that Attila took over the old temple in 439 A.D., and used it as a base for his marauding army.
The Huns are believed to have first collected and then destroyed a large gathering of Greek legal writs at the site.
It is believed that Attila wanted to study the Greek legal system and had the writs and other documents brought to the temple.
Scholars differ on why he had the valuable documents destroyed either because he was barely literate and couldnt read them, or because they provided evidence of a democratic government that did not square with his own notion of rule by an all-powerful tyrant.
When the Greek church took over the site in the 15th century and the convent was built, church leaders ordered the pagan statue of Eros destroyed, so another ancient Greek treasure was lost.
Today, as has been said, there is only the lone sister, watching over the old Hun base.
Thats right
there are no Huns, No Writs, No Eros, and Nun on base.
Two minds...forget the “age difference!”
;o]
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